530 - I wake up... spouse is already gone and at work; I sometimes workout, sometimes go back to sleep depending on what I need
615/630 - shower and get ready, have breakfast 7/715 - get kid up 730 - kid bfast 745 - out the door for daycare drop off 815/830 - home, immediately start work (sometimes have already taken a call in the car.. 1-2 days a week) Work until 5- partner has gotten home from work and then gone to get kid by now 5 through 6 - alternate playing with kid, prep dinner, mindlessly zoning out from the day 6-630 dinner 630-7 one does bathtime or play while the other cleans dinner up 7-8 playtime, maybe a movie depending on parent energy 8 - kid bedtime 8-830 clean 830-930 watch a show together; sometimes have to work during this window but it’s the exception and due to an emergency; take care of community obligations, ordering groceries, scheduling appts, etc 930 bed Repeat I try to take walks as breaks during my work day or walking meetings. Mixed success. My work days are intensive and I am constantly in meetings or barely making deadlines. It’s a grind even working a 40-45 hour week because of the intensity of my work day. So basically... go to bed earlier and wake up earlier or give up the idea for now. |
7ish - get up,, dresss
7:30 - feed dog, eat breakfast with family 8 - walk dog 8:30 - log in to work 9 - nanny arrives 1pm - break for lunch, sometimes DH joins, sometimes we eat at our desks 5 - walk dog with a kid or two 5:30 or 6 - work out 6-ish - sit with kids while they finish eating dinner nanny made them, then they play 7 - DH starts cooking dinner while I get them ready for bed, then we go in one at a time to say goodnight 8pm - DH and I eat dinner 10 - shower, change for bed |
We have a similar life. I ride the peloton or do peloton strength in the 8:15-9 block which is when my husband drops the baby at daycare. Is that an option for you? I mean he made those kids too. |
I work night shift. DH works from home normal hours. Ds is 8 and currently homeschooled. Will give you our schedule on days I work/sleep
8am DS gets up and dh makes the 2 of them breakfast (DH gets up around 7). I'll get home around 830a 830-9 I hang out with DS 9-930 DH goes over DS' schoolwork for the day. 930-11 DS does school, DH works 11-1145 dh takes a break from work and does school stuff with DS 1145-1 - lunch breaks, dog walk, downtime for DS 1-245 more work and school. At 245 DS is free to do whatever he wants. 330- I wake up and review schoolwork with DS 330-430 DS and I take the dog for a walk or hike 430-545 - we relax. DS usually calls a friend and they play games together. I relax. 545 - I leave for work. DH makes dinner for him and DS and then they hang out or do their own thing. With spring, DS will have baseball practice 3 days a week. 8p -DS goes up to bed. Lights off at 9p Dh goes to bed at 945. On my off days I do the homeschooling and do more of the hands on parts of it. It actually works out surprisingly well. |
I’m one of the people who said I didn’t think my schedule would help you, but it sounds like it might, since I don’t spend 3 hours with my kid on weekdays. We just have one 1 year old. 8am - I wake up with baby, get him dressed and fed. Husband sleeps a few extra minutes, showers, gets ready. 8:30 - Husband takes baby and unloads the dishwasher while he plays. I exercise (15 mins) and get ready. 9am - nanny arrives, we start work 5pm - we finish work, nanny leaves. Husband takes baby for a few minutes, then puts him down for independent playtime from 5:15-5:45. I have this time to myself - meditate, relax. Husband also has 30 mins to himself. 5:45pm - family walk 6:15 - I take the baby. Bath time 2x per week, cut his nails 1x per week, otherwise we just play. Husband cooks dinner. 7pm - family dinner. We eat together. A highlight of the day! 7:45pm - one of us (we alternate) does bedtime. The other will clean the kitchen at some point in the evening. 8pm - baby bedtime. From then on, we have the evening to ourselves though one of us has to clean up the kitchen. We have date night, talk to friends, relax, do hobbies etc. I would say we each have to work in the evenings maybe 1-2 nights a month. Thursday evenings we reserve for some chores, usually including meal planning, grocery delivery order, and some house projects. My husband also exercises a few nights a week (I’m fine with my 15 mins a day plus the 30 mins walk) Works great for us but 1) my husband does half the childcare and household stuff, 2) we both only work 40 hrs a week and 3) we don’t get a ton of time with our kid during the week, but we have zero guilt about it. |
You don't have a workload problem you have an unequal division of labor issue. Orange theory has 5am class, have your husband do the wake up. |
I have two toddlers as well and a really similar schedule and am also really struggling to figure out how to get workouts in. So far it's patchy as hell, but my best bet is to work out both days on the weekend (while partner is with kids, since they have a better ability to fit a time into their work day), try to book in one 45 minute online class on a weeknight and just know I'll either stay up late to work more that night or something will slip at work the next day (or if the night I reserved is just too busy, I'll try to swap it with another), and I aim to get in two 30-min audio call walks during the week. It sounds like a lot and yet doesn't really add up to much but it's something. I also try not to kick myself too much if it doesn't happen, and just try again the next week. |
Have your nanny handle the preschool drop off. |
I simply do not understand why you wouldn't have 30-60 minutes at some point in the day, at least a few days a week, for an at-home workout since you are already working from home. I have law firm and consulting firm partners, political consultants, etc. in my circle -- lots of people with long hours who work a lot and have lots of meetings. Most find time to workout during the day, assuming they have full time childcare, which OP has.
I just can't imagine what you must do that is literally wall-to-wall meetings with no time at all for a 45 (or even 30 minute) workout. Heck, I subscribe to an online workout platform that has 10 and 15 minute classes. Eat lunch while working so you can get a little workout it in. I really don't see this as you needing to spend less time with your kids (though no judgment at all if that's what you need). It really seems you should be able to fit a workout into your workday, particularly given that you are at home and not commuting. |
OP, working 8.5 hours solidly with *zero* breaks is a lot. Most professionals have at least some breaks in their day/latitude with their schedules, and people who do shift work, e.g., nurses, are both on their feet all day and only do that 3-4 times/week. You’re also apparently working an additional 90 minutes, at least. If you want to prioritize working a 10 hour day, that’s your priority. But not everyone does that.
All that aside, there are multiple places you could find a workout: -Very early morning, and your spouse does kid wake-up -Nanny does preschool drop-off and you use that time to workout -Schedule a 45 minute break during the day for a quick home workout -Post-dinner walk/run in jogging stroller I have three kids (9, 7, 5) and work FT. I’ve worked out daily since I had them, as I did for many years pre-kids. Having the time to work out matters more to me than a career that requires 10 hour workdays, but again, that’s my priority. I love my job, too, and don’t do it part-time, but I also don’t do it 50+ hours/week. |
Is there a reason your husband can’t take morning a couple times a week? I work out 30-40 min 2x a week in the AM abs those are the days my husband takes. The kids are sometimes dressed funny and the kitchen can be a bit of a disaster but it is what it is. |
I also work from home, but my job is more independent than yours (not a lot of meetings) so I go for runs on my lunch break. Or DH and I swap off giving each other a half hour to work out in the basement while the other cooks dinner (kids get tv time). Plus I get an hour or so on the weekends.
My kids are a bit older though (4 and 6). It’s really hard when they’re toddlers and need constant supervision to stay out of trouble. |
I have three kids and husband and I work from home. I have a very similar schedule, but I eat while I work (whenever I can) and go forward a 30 min run in the morning (whenever I can). I almost always have an hour here and there without meetings and I run outside. I try to run fast and get as much as I can from my 30 min. It’s not perfect (nor probably enough), but it’s good for now. When I was less busy at work (6 months ago), I was able to run for 30 min and do a 20 min online class (abs, butt and legs, etc.) and my older kids would usually do it with me. |
Both kids have an incredibly strong preference and will just stand at the gate screaming for me. They’re totally fine with the nanny, dh is just kind of agitated and grouchy in the morning and they all feed off of each other and I feel guilty that the kids are starting the day on such a negative tone. I could get up at like 615 and do a 30min workout right away in my room so he wouldn’t be on his own with them for long (yes it’s a bigger problem and dh just needs to suck it up and slap on a pleasant attitude but I unfortunately can’t solve that) |
We have a 5yo and an 11mo who are in daycare at a center about 5 minutes from our house. DH and I are both WFH due to the pandemic, so of course this will likely change in a few months, but here is ours:
Up at 5:30AM. Shower and log into work by 6AM. Kids wake up between 7 and 7:15. I stop work for an hour to handle morning routine. Out the door and headed to daycare by 8AM. Work 8:15 until 4PM. One of us (usually me) stops work at 4PM to do daycare pickup. Home by 4:30. One hour to play with both girls and prep dinner. Dinner at 5:30. Bath, bottle, and bed for 11mo around 7PM. Another hour or so with 5yo one-on-one time until I start her bedtime routine around 8:15PM. She is in bed, lights out by 8:45 (late, I know...trying to shift her earlier backfires every time. She’s always been on the low end of sleep needs). I do chores around the house and prep for the next day until I go to bed at 9:30. Sometimes I end up needing to log back into work for a bit to handle emails, but I am trying to minimize that (yes, I am kind of mommy-tracked). I prioritize sleep for me, mainly because I have anxiety issues these days and just don’t sleep well anymore...I am almost always awake in the middle of the night for an hour or two. With this schedule and prioritizing sleep, I have no “me” time. I’m not happy about it, but I’ve gotten used to it. |