If you have young kids and work full time what is your daily schedule?

[Anonymous]

This is NOT a sah/woh debate. I’m purely curious about the logistics of working parent schedules when the kids are too young to not be intensively supervised because I’m trying to find 45min a day to workout and can’t seem to before I’m too exhausted. Mine is below but more looking for other examples than to trouble shoot mine

- 6am up which whichever toddler is up first (sometimes 530 sometimes 630). Play with kids and get them started on breakfast by 730
- 745 nanny comes - go shower, dress, catch up on overnight work email
- 825-9 - drop preschooler off at school (only 10min away but full process with getting out door, parking at school etc takes this long)
- 9-530 - frantically work (from home - will be home post Covid) tons and tons of video calls, maybe get in a 30min walk outside while on an audio only call. Get a couple 30min blocks between calls to do actual work
- 530 -8 - dinner/ bath / play / bedtime with kids. In theory both are down by 730 but older one is often up a couple times. Clean kitchen up. If all goes well, kids and kitchen are done by 8
- 8-930 - work - get documents etc ready for meetings the next day. Get emails out. Also do any online shopping needed (grocery orders, Amazon orders etc)
- 930-1030 - great ready for bed, fiddle on phone, watch a show, can’t make myself go to bed before 1030 bc this 30min or so is the only time I really get to just do nothing

I love my job and can’t do it in a part time way. The hours aren’t actually that crazy for work given I have no commute, it’s just that between work and caring for kids every minute feels taken up. I just want to figure out a time for a good 30min workout, probably needing 45min total to change clothes / cool off

[Anonymous]

I think your best bet is to try for 45 min twice a week on weekends and call it a day. With the 30 min walk on audio calls that’s not bad. Also get a standing desk and a ball chair so you can work the core while seated.

I am about 7 years into parenting. The first couple years I exercised (nothing major — walks and yoga). Stuff got really busy with work and have just started going on occasional walks again this year — we are now juggling work and no childcare. Honestly it’s not a priority for me though I understand why it would be for some. We do hike, bike, etc. as a family and we are pretty active. Eat very healthy. I’ve gained maybe 2-3 lbs since having kids but some of that is just aging. I’ll try to work out when we have childcare again. Right now the kids are at important ages and there always seems to be more we could do to help them grow.

[Anonymous]

Two kids, ages 6&3.

Wake up at 630. Get ready and make breakfast for everyone.

Dress 3 year old and get them to the table for breakfast between 715-745. Leave with 3 year old for daycare for 815 drop off.

Come back home and prep 6 year old for virtual kindergarten school start at 900. Work with her in the same room until school is over at 230. She goes off somewhere and plays while I work until 445 (what she does during this time is mostly a mystery to me. This week she shampooed and conditioned all of her stuffed animals’ fur). Go and pick up 3 year old at daycare at 5.

Throw food at their faces for dinner.

Bedtime and associated activities between 730 and 800 PM

Collapse in a heap, but not before cleaning up any emails from the day since I’m really only working from about 9 until 445 with numerous disruptions.

It’s been mostly fine (and I have a helpful spouse who also works full time), but I’m nearing the end of my sanity

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Two kids, ages 6&3.

Wake up at 630. Get ready and make breakfast for everyone.

Dress 3 year old and get them to the table for breakfast between 715-745. Leave with 3 year old for daycare for 815 drop off.

Come back home and prep 6 year old for virtual kindergarten school start at 900. Work with her in the same room until school is over at 230. She goes off somewhere and plays while I work until 445 (what she does during this time is mostly a mystery to me. This week she shampooed and conditioned all of her stuffed animals’ fur). Go and pick up 3 year old at daycare at 5.

Throw food at their faces for dinner.

Bedtime and associated activities between 730 and 800 PM

Collapse in a heap, but not before cleaning up any emails from the day since I’m really only working from about 9 until 445 with numerous disruptions.

It’s been mostly fine (and I have a helpful spouse who also works full time), but I’m nearing the end of my sanity

All that, but did I mention that I got a tiny treadmill for under my desk? I walk less than 2mph, but it really adds up. There will be a time in my life for dedicated workouts, but this is not it.

[Anonymous]

I think you first have the reassess the urgency at which you are working and be willing to find areas to slack at. I
From your description, I think this might actually benefit your work, so don’t think of it as a negative. You also need to bite the bullet and get up at 5:30am to exercise. If a kid wakes up, train them to sit on couch and watch or join you. You will have to go to bed earlier and this means no fiddling on phone. Sorry it sucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Two kids, ages 6&3.

Wake up at 630. Get ready and make breakfast for everyone.

Dress 3 year old and get them to the table for breakfast between 715-745. Leave with 3 year old for daycare for 815 drop off.

Come back home and prep 6 year old for virtual kindergarten school start at 900. Work with her in the same room until school is over at 230. She goes off somewhere and plays while I work until 445 (what she does during this time is mostly a mystery to me. This week she shampooed and conditioned all of her stuffed animals’ fur). Go and pick up 3 year old at daycare at 5.

Throw food at their faces for dinner.

Bedtime and associated activities between 730 and 800 PM

Collapse in a heap, but not before cleaning up any emails from the day since I’m really only working from about 9 until 445 with numerous disruptions.

It’s been mostly fine (and I have a helpful spouse who also works full time), but I’m nearing the end of my sanity

Because of COVID or even before?

[Anonymous]

I would move your nanny arrival up to 7:30, and see if you can get Saturday morning childcare as well. After COVID, join a gym that has childcare and both parents work out on the weekends. Try for 10 minutes of yoga/stretching/meditation on the weekdays.

I think you need to accept that something has to give. You may need to set some harder boundaries with your work. I understand you can't do part time but is the evening work really necessary? Try to at least block off one evening a week and communicate that in advance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two kids, ages 6&3.

Wake up at 630. Get ready and make breakfast for everyone.

Dress 3 year old and get them to the table for breakfast between 715-745. Leave with 3 year old for daycare for 815 drop off.

Come back home and prep 6 year old for virtual kindergarten school start at 900. Work with her in the same room until school is over at 230. She goes off somewhere and plays while I work until 445 (what she does during this time is mostly a mystery to me. This week she shampooed and conditioned all of her stuffed animals’ fur). Go and pick up 3 year old at daycare at 5.

Throw food at their faces for dinner.

Bedtime and associated activities between 730 and 800 PM

Collapse in a heap, but not before cleaning up any emails from the day since I’m really only working from about 9 until 445 with numerous disruptions.

It’s been mostly fine (and I have a helpful spouse who also works full time), but I’m nearing the end of my sanity

Because of COVID or even before?

I definitely wasn’t grateful enough for my life before covid. Both kids had daycare in the building where I worked, so I’d drop them off and go upstairs to my office. Now it’s the constant disruptions to routine that are killing me. Daycare was closed for 4+ months over the past year and virtual school for a kindergarten kid has been a really hard adjustment. We do the best we can though.

[Anonymous]

I could tell you my schedule, but it wouldn’t help you. The truth is, it sounds like you’re either a single parent or your spouse is useless, so you’re covering the kids all the time, and you work around 50 hours a week. If those two things were true, I would not have time to exercise either.

[Anonymous]

How often do you get to walk while on a call? If it's most days, you really only need to find a couple of days per week to fit in strength training.

Somewhere in your week you need an hour. That is far more doable than 45 min per day.

I would set an alarm for 5:30. If a kid wakes up and can't wait, then your 30 mins needs to come out of evening work.

Or, accept that a 30 minute walk most days is good enough for now.

[Anonymous]

Ok, like PPs, I don't think my schedule with help you because I think your issues are very specific. I have found I absolutely have to find time to work out pretty much daily or I am a terrible worker and parent. I need it for mental health, the physical benefits are ancillary. So here's what I would do in your situation, with your schedule, in order to prioritize workouts since they are that important to me.

#1 is to schedule a home workout and put it on your work calendar. I get you are in calls all day, I get it. I mean put this on your calendar, block it off so people can't schedule calls during that time. I find that lunch is a good time to do this because a lot of people run errands or take a lunch hour even in demanding fields. But depending on your job, you might find a better time. I once had a schedule where the best time for me to workout was between 4 and 5pm because there was this late day lull as people tried to wrap up projects, followed by the evening scramble of emails and calls. So I'd workout from like 4:15 to 4:45 or 5pm, and then immediately get back on my computer and finish my work day. The workout even boosted my productivity because it woke my brain up.

There just has to be a way to squeeze a workout into your workday. I'm not suggesting moving to a more part-time schedule, I'm saying you must be able to take a break in your day for something like this that matters, especially if you are otherwise productive.

Which brings me to my second suggestion, which is shorter workouts. Try shorter, more intense workouts. I love a good 30 minute barre or HIIT midday. If you set up your workout space at home ahead of time, it's really quick. And working from home means you can wear leggings and a sports bra all day -- just throw on a work appropriate top for zooms if necessary. Minimize the barrier to entry is what I'm saying.

If you want, you can even do micro workouts that are built into your day. I'm assuming that even with wall-to-wall meetings you are still getting up to get food and go to the bathroom, yes? Hang a pull-up bar in the bathroom doorway. Put a yoga mat on the floor next to your desk and tape a list of exercises to the wall right next to it (hundreds, lunges, squats, planks, boat pose holds, etc.). Every time you get up, do something. You will be amazed at what you can get out of a series of 2-5-minute exercise bursts throughout the day. You can even throw one in if you are on a call where you don't have to participate occasionally. I used to be required to attend quarterly earnings calls for work but never had to speak, so I'd workout or fold laundry straight through.

And as another PP suggested, just getting up and doing it first thing while kids eat breakfast can work too. You just have to get them acclimated to it.

Just commit to it. Being a working parent is really hard and the time crunch is real. But this is really something that you can absolutely find the time for, especially if you are full time WFH, and it will actually help with the time crunch and exhaustion because it will be so good for you. You just have to get creative and make it a top priority. Would you stop eating because of your work schedule? No, you have to eat. This is like that. You have to move your body. It is non-optional.

[Anonymous]

What do you do OP? You work a lot

[Anonymous]

Op here - I just want to see others schedules to see where people are finding the time or are they also not. I struggle with feeling like I should spend 3+ hours a day with my kids minimum, it’d be helpful to see that most people actually spend less or more or similar or whatever. Or maybe people just suck it up more on less sleep and I need to decide if I want to try that. Or go to bed earlier and get up early to do the work from the night before bc they find that more productive. Or no one is actually working out in this life stage except the Instagram influencers. I don’t think any one sample schedule will solve my problem, just curious what others are going successfully or struggling with

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How often do you get to walk while on a call? If it's most days, you really only need to find a couple of days per week to fit in strength training.

Somewhere in your week you need an hour. That is far more doable than 45 min per day.

I would set an alarm for 5:30. If a kid wakes up and can't wait, then your 30 mins needs to come out of evening work.

Or, accept that a 30 minute walk most days is good enough for now.

Most days for 30ish minutes but even with that I don’t break 5k steps most days

[Anonymous]

Be kind to yourself, OP. Us parents have been asked to do something most would balk at. This situation was unprecedented and many of us are caught in between unforgiving employers and unforgiving school districts. Both expect us to keep them in business at the expense of our own health and sanity.