Being told you look 'sick' at your ideal weight?

[Anonymous]

OP here thanks for the responses. I used to be 50lbs overweight and was fat thru most of my childhood, teens, and young adulthood. These ladies knew me when I was fat and the comment struck a cord with me. One of the ladies used to be very thin herself but gained a lot of weight in her butt mostly. I actually haven't felt discriminated for my weight but I was ridiculed for it as a kid. The sick comment though stinged more than any fat shame I may have received.

Agree they may have been jealous or they may have a different perception of what a normal weight might be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jealous. You don’t look sick. I’m 5’7” and I used to be 107. I didn’t even look sick. I looked skinny.

I mean, this is clinically underweight (BMI of 16.8). I'm 5'7 too and a former varsity athlete. At my absolute lowest I was 118-120 and didn't get my period, was getting injured constantly, and looked fit but my face looked sick and I was getting thick hair on my arms while losing chunks of my hair from my head. I had to get into the 125 range on the advice of our medical team to stop getting stress fractures.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here thanks for the responses. I used to be 50lbs overweight and was fat thru most of my childhood, teens, and young adulthood. These ladies knew me when I was fat and the comment struck a cord with me. One of the ladies used to be very thin herself but gained a lot of weight in her butt mostly. I actually haven't felt discriminated for my weight but I was ridiculed for it as a kid. The sick comment though stinged more than any fat shame I may have received.

Agree they may have been jealous or they may have a different perception of what a normal weight might be.

So this isn't a question of whether it is you or them, but a thread for talking about fat people being jealous of thin people?

Or is there anything more involved in this conversation?

[Anonymous]

It's 100% because they are used to seeing you fatter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's 100% because they are used to seeing you fatter.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's 100% because they are used to seeing you fatter.

Possibly but I didn't make any remarks about their weight gain and they had seen me just a few months ago when I was a little less thin and didn't say anything. Prior to this I hadn't experienced skinny shaming in my life. It is worse than fat shame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's 100% because they are used to seeing you fatter.

Possibly but I didn't make any remarks about their weight gain and they had seen me just a few months ago when I was a little less thin and didn't say anything. Prior to this I hadn't experienced skinny shaming in my life. It is worse than fat shame.

It depends on how much weight you lost in that few months. If it was enough weight loss that they noticed (when they didn’t comment before) Maybe the drastic change is what they were concerned about. Give them the benefit of the doubt . Why automatic assume they were jealous. Sounds like you all are friends if you meet up every few months at the salon. Maybe they were reaching out to you in case you needed help and were in fact sick.

Also have you considered that maybe you do “look” sick?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, honest question: are you *asking* if it could be them, as in you think it might be that you actually looked sick, but maybe not -- or are you telling people you were treated badly, and you think it was out of jealousy for having lost weight while they gained?

I mean, is talking about anything other than "fat women are jealous of thin women" even relevant? I can't tell, but it seems like your mind is already made up, no?

This. What’s your point, OP? Yes, they’re terribly jealous of you. Does that feel good?

[Anonymous]

Depends on your age- it does seem like older women who lose a bunch of weight look a bit ill but younger people who lose weight look healthier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's 100% because they are used to seeing you fatter.

Possibly but I didn't make any remarks about their weight gain and they had seen me just a few months ago when I was a little less thin and didn't say anything. Prior to this I hadn't experienced skinny shaming in my life. It is worse than fat shame.

It depends on how much weight you lost in that few months. If it was enough weight loss that they noticed (when they didn’t comment before) Maybe the drastic change is what they were concerned about. Give them the benefit of the doubt . Why automatic assume they were jealous. Sounds like you all are friends if you meet up every few months at the salon. Maybe they were reaching out to you in case you needed help and were in fact sick.

Also have you considered that maybe you do “look” sick?

We aren't friends. They work in the salon. I haven't been told by anyone else I looked sick. I am also in my 30s and everyone in my family ages well so can't be due to age. No wrinkles, gray hairs, or saghyness. The thought that people are used to seeing certain bigger body types instead of thinner ones did cross my mind. But at that weight I felt my best and looked my best. I gained back 8 and its not the same. I feel fat now and wide! But I felt so thin in comparison to most people in the regular everyday dmv. To be called sick though by people who are used to seeing bigger stung.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's 100% because they are used to seeing you fatter.

Possibly but I didn't make any remarks about their weight gain and they had seen me just a few months ago when I was a little less thin and didn't say anything. Prior to this I hadn't experienced skinny shaming in my life. It is worse than fat shame.

It depends on how much weight you lost in that few months. If it was enough weight loss that they noticed (when they didn’t comment before) Maybe the drastic change is what they were concerned about. Give them the benefit of the doubt . Why automatic assume they were jealous. Sounds like you all are friends if you meet up every few months at the salon. Maybe they were reaching out to you in case you needed help and were in fact sick.

Also have you considered that maybe you do “look” sick?

We aren't friends. They work in the salon. I haven't been told by anyone else I looked sick. I am also in my 30s and everyone in my family ages well so can't be due to age. No wrinkles, gray hairs, or saghyness. The thought that people are used to seeing certain bigger body types instead of thinner ones did cross my mind. But at that weight I felt my best and looked my best. I gained back 8 and its not the same. I feel fat now and wide! But I felt so thin in comparison to most people in the regular everyday dmv. To be called sick though by people who are used to seeing bigger stung.

My sister is a stylist and tells me her coworkers are mean, bitter and petty.

[Anonymous]

You probably have a flatter stomach but you probably also have a flatter butt, boobs and sullen face.

I find it’s almost impossible to have a perfect body.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they were worried that you might have had Covid?

Some people have lost a lot of weight when they have been sick with Covid and it’s not that crazy to think of that since we’re in the middle of a pandemic.

[Anonymous]

1. They’re jealous. Ignore.

2. You look pale and tired. Get outside a bit, take multivitamins.

3. Well done on your weight loss!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe you looked tired or stressed out. The comment, rude as it was, was not necessarily about your weight.

It was because they commented on my weight loss.

The salon full of ladies knew you lost weight? You knew they gained weight? All of them gained weight? Troll.