| I think OP's XH is being the bigger person here. No, not everything is subterfuge or with nefarious intent. You need to heal yourself so you don't continue to feel these things because they will continue to amp up when they all go on getaways together. Even if it's the OW, it's still none of your business, imo, unless she is belligerent to the kids. |
| Yes. Call your lawyer. Drag him into court to get a restraining order preventing him from introducing your kids to anyone for the rest of their lives. |
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I'd be grateful that he told you. If you're going to have an emotional reaction to this, I'd think having it when the kids aren't with you would be healthier for everyone.
The fact that your first thought is about how it impacts you, and not how it impacts your kids, is a little alarming to me. |
| My kid came running into the house crying at custody exchange because her mom old her she was getting remarried. What my ex does is her business, but a heads up would have been nice before I had a sobbing kid on my hands. Agree with others to leave the door open for your kids to talk about GF and their feelings (good or bad). It does suck to still be tied to an ex this way. |
| Why on earth would you call your lawyer unless this goes against something already in your agreement?! My agreement is that I must be informed before he introduces kids, but that's it. No details or anything. Just that I'm informed before the kids meet someone. Nothing I can do about it except hope the person is good to my kids. Yeah, it's going to sting I'm sure, but it's life. |
I have the same question and if the answer is yes, does this change how everyone would respond? Also, what about the age of the kids? |
Wouldn't change my answer. |
NP who agrees with the other posters. This wouldn't change my answer either. Better to know than to not know and no, even if they cheated you cannot control what your ex spouse does. Information like that might change my overall impression of her ex, but not the advice I'd give to OP. As written it seems like the DH is the good guy here keeping it civil and lines of communication open. If say, they finalized their divorce a week ago and this is the woman who broke them up I would think he was a mega d-bag but still, it is what it is and the kids should be the priority. |
| OP is mad because new woman is thinner, younger, and prettier. |
And what did that get the new woman? The old husband? |
Kinda dickish comment, no? |
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| “Thank you for letting me know.” And hopefully someday you will stop being hurt for long enough to actually realize that he deserves thanks. |
| What do you think your lawyer is going to do? |
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This may sound left field... run a background check on the SO.
Definitely worth knowing! |