Signs your SO is a narcissist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The attention. Needed lots of attention/admiration.
Extremely flirtatious.
Fixated on himself/body
Entitled
Talked down how other men were losers
Everyone was always lame.
Felt he was special
Very critical

His father was an alcoholic, cheater and extreme narcissist. His mother was cold, borderline and in denial of everything.

He love bombed the shit out of me the first few years and could charm and make anyone believe anything.

I see it’s all a cover for how much they hate themselves on the inside. They also learn to feel no guilt/empathy.

What makes it worse is they have the ability to make even most therapists think they are wonderful. They are experts at manipulation and charm. That compounds the feelings of isolation and thinking you are absolutely crazy. Their personas at home and outside of the home are often very different. It's easy for them to portray as the 'crazy one'...and, again, they are never at fault in their eyes. It is always somebody else's fault for driving or making them do whatever ill behavior they choose to partake...

Yep. It’s eery. They also tend to target well-adjusted women for long-term relationships because these women are unsuspecting and don’t believe anyone is capable of being so covertly evil.

+2.

Divorcing a narcissist is pure hell. When you realize who they really are you wonder if you are so well adjusted to have fallen foe a person like this. Just a reminder — there is nothing wrong with YOU for BELIEVING A LIE. You were lied to, manipulated, and used as emotional bait. There are 2 people I know who feel guilt from falling for a person like this, the issue is not with you, it’s them. Be thankful you woke up and have the strength to course correct.

Also narcissists will often put you on a pedestal. Doing so will often make you think act favorably towards you, which is the total end game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm watching The Undoing and am intrigued by narcissism. How can you tell your SO is a narcissist? Any telltale signs? I suspect my DH is one.

They are on the spectrum and present as selfish, narcissistic, thoughtless, careless. Also lies, omits and gaslights to cover up mistakes, which are frequent.

In reality, they have mind blindness, no foresight, can only talk about their favorite things, and can’t care or take care of anything.

But a true narcissistic can and will use emotion to manipulate, hFA individuals don’t care and are emotionless (unless having a temper tantrum).

hFA?

High functioning autism= aspergers. Ok with the speaking and eye contact, Tho will move convos in order to lecture on fave 1-2 topics.

High functioning aspergers are in no means narcissists. Narcissists ooze charm, something somebody with asperger's is incapable of doing. Narcissists know how to use emotion to use and abuse. Asperger's are devoid of emotion and have zero EQ. They wouldn't know how to begin to skillfully manipulate and gaslight someone.

This is true! Also HFA are usually so practical and logical that they take your statement at face value and emotions don’t cloud their judgment. That is helpful when discussing or sharing criticism, but it is also difficult for them to express the same type of love and affection that makes their partner feel loved.

I have a wonderful HFA girlfriend and there is no way she could be so self absorbed as a narcissist. And the narcissist I am thinking of would immediately dismiss any possibility of self-reflection. They literally fake it until they make it. Everything they do mirrors what they see, good or bad. They learn how to piece together normal human behavior in a manipulative manner. This is also why they’re attracted to well adjusted intelligent ans particularly empathetic women. Really easy to mirror sentiments of an emoter and store those tricks in their actors manual of manipulation.

What makes it worse is they have the ability to make even most therapists think they are wonderful. They are experts at manipulation and charm. That compounds the feelings of isolation and thinking you are absolutely crazy. Their personas at home and outside of the home are often very different. It's easy for them to portray as the 'crazy one'...and, again, they are never at fault in their eyes. It is always somebody else's fault for driving or making them do whatever ill behavior they choose to partake...

[Anonymous]

The easiest way to deal with one is to make them think they are always correct and always in control and show no opinion, emotion, cafe about anything. Mirror their empty soul with your behavior. They will never change so it is simply an issue of how you manage a relationship if you’re required to interact with someone like that.

Gray rock and agree. Blink once as a response. They don’t want to mirror a gray rock. They will move on to a prettier shiny rock that refracts cool colors. Don’t be the sparkly rock. Save yourself.

🪨

[Anonymous]

One sign: if she acts just like Joan Crawford.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm watching The Undoing and am intrigued by narcissism. How can you tell your SO is a narcissist? Any telltale signs? I suspect my DH is one.

They are on the spectrum and present as selfish, narcissistic, thoughtless, careless. Also lies, omits and gaslights to cover up mistakes, which are frequent.

In reality, they have mind blindness, no foresight, can only talk about their favorite things, and can’t care or take care of anything.

But a true narcissistic can and will use emotion to manipulate, hFA individuals don’t care and are emotionless (unless having a temper tantrum).

hFA?

High functioning autism= aspergers. Ok with the speaking and eye contact, Tho will move convos in order to lecture on fave 1-2 topics.

High functioning aspergers are in no means narcissists. Narcissists ooze charm, something somebody with asperger's is incapable of doing. Narcissists know how to use emotion to use and abuse. Asperger's are devoid of emotion and have zero EQ. They wouldn't know how to begin to skillfully manipulate and gaslight someone.

I feel like there can be some overlap between autism spectrum and narcissism? It is really hard to describe and articulate though. My ex husband needs a lot of praise and learned to be very superficially charming in many situations despite some pretty pronounced social deficits. Times when he struggles with reading other people, missing social clues, or completely misinterpreting behavior (autistic tendencies?) it makes him angry and frustrated because others aren't seeing and acknowledging how great he is and giving him the validation he needs (narcissism?). I am still trying to figure out his behavior and how it has affected me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One sign: if she acts just like Joan Crawford.

No, that is just straight crazy.