What is considered a striver?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A hard worker finds something they love to do and work at it because they love it and are successful.

A striver looks at what others do to gain money and/or power and they try to imitate it.

A striver finds out what all the check boxes are for success and try to check all the boxes.

My son, for example, loves to play the trumpet and he excelled at it. He begged me to practice and we begged him to stop. 😀 He got a scholarship to a top university because of his passion. He as kss as I pl as us 10 other instruments but not as well.

Other kids hated playing an instrument but did because they thought it would help with college admissions. They checked every box... SAT prep.., check, instrument check, sport... check ... volunteer, check. None with more EC’s, better SATs, higher GPA got into as better university. They are going to a great colleges and they are fine with where they ended up (their parents... not so much). But they (thr parents) all bemoan that my son with just Trumpet 🎺 got into a better college.

This is basically what 10:19 was talking about.

+ 1. The PP uses the term to talk down others who work smart because (s)he doesn't like it. what's wrong with imitating others to become rich of be more successful?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is a slam against people who plug away and try. Strivers are people who are diligent, exert effort, dot their i's and cross their t's, they do the right things, they try to do/say the right things, they are the backbone, they obey the laws, etc. My husband and I are strivers.

None of that sounds striver-y to me. That’s just normal person stuff. I think of strivers as erroneously believing that people in such-and-such neighborhood/school/job/etc are better/happier/cooler than they are and they’re dying to fit in. It comes from a place of insecurity and the ultimate point, should they ever “arrive,” is just to rub it on the faces of people they left behind. Joke’s on them though, because it turns out none of those people are better/happier/cooler and everyone they left behind will laugh at them and call them strivers.

You would think it’s normal, but it really depends on who you associate with. A lot of our friends are like this, but I would say DH’s and my siblings just aren’t. Paying bills on time, having steady jobs, and the like are a challenge for whatever reason.

+1. It should be normal, but it isn't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A hard worker finds something they love to do and work at it because they love it and are successful.

A striver looks at what others do to gain money and/or power and they try to imitate it.

A striver finds out what all the check boxes are for success and try to check all the boxes.

My son, for example, loves to play the trumpet and he excelled at it. He begged me to practice and we begged him to stop. 😀 He got a scholarship to a top university because of his passion. He as kss as I pl as us 10 other instruments but not as well.

Other kids hated playing an instrument but did because they thought it would help with college admissions. They checked every box... SAT prep.., check, instrument check, sport... check ... volunteer, check. None with more EC’s, better SATs, higher GPA got into as better university. They are going to a great colleges and they are fine with where they ended up (their parents... not so much). But they (thr parents) all bemoan that my son with just Trumpet 🎺 got into a better college.

This is basically what 10:19 was talking about.

+ 1. The PP uses the term to talk down others who work smart because (s)he doesn't like it. what's wrong with imitating others to become rich of be more successful?

The world is not black and white.

There is no right and wrong here.

Strivers tough through stuff they hate to get money and/or power.

Others work hard at things they love whether money and/or power follows doesn’t matter to them. It might it might not.

I think striving for money and/or power will bring you unhappiness spiritually/emotionally. I don’t think it’s wrong it’s just that there are decisions and consequences... if you know the consequences and are good with them, go for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is a slam against people who plug away and try. Strivers are people who are diligent, exert effort, dot their i's and cross their t's, they do the right things, they try to do/say the right things, they are the backbone, they obey the laws, etc. My husband and I are strivers.

None of that sounds striver-y to me. That’s just normal person stuff. I think of strivers as erroneously believing that people in such-and-such neighborhood/school/job/etc are better/happier/cooler than they are and they’re dying to fit in. It comes from a place of insecurity and the ultimate point, should they ever “arrive,” is just to rub it on the faces of people they left behind. Joke’s on them though, because it turns out none of those people are better/happier/cooler and everyone they left behind will laugh at them and call them strivers.

You would think it’s normal, but it really depends on who you associate with. A lot of our friends are like this, but I would say DH’s and my siblings just aren’t. Paying bills on time, having steady jobs, and the like are a challenge for whatever reason.

Still, what you describe are not strivers.

It’s not like there are 2 groups strivers and non strivers. There are a myriad of type of people.

[Anonymous]

Anyone who upsets a WASP who's annoyed that their way of life is going the way of the dinosaurs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who upsets a WASP who's annoyed that their way of life is going the way of the dinosaurs.

Pardon me while I clutch my pearls

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is a slam against people who plug away and try. Strivers are people who are diligent, exert effort, dot their i's and cross their t's, they do the right things, they try to do/say the right things, they are the backbone, they obey the laws, etc. My husband and I are strivers.

None of that sounds striver-y to me. That’s just normal person stuff. I think of strivers as erroneously believing that people in such-and-such neighborhood/school/job/etc are better/happier/cooler than they are and they’re dying to fit in. It comes from a place of insecurity and the ultimate point, should they ever “arrive,” is just to rub it on the faces of people they left behind. Joke’s on them though, because it turns out none of those people are better/happier/cooler and everyone they left behind will laugh at them and call them strivers.

You would think it’s normal, but it really depends on who you associate with. A lot of our friends are like this, but I would say DH’s and my siblings just aren’t. Paying bills on time, having steady jobs, and the like are a challenge for whatever reason.

Still, what you describe are not strivers.

It’s not like there are 2 groups strivers and non strivers. There are a myriad of type of people.

Don’t most people not love their jobs but they work to live. I would say this is the vast majority of people.

[Anonymous]

Means the same thing as tryhard except used by 30 something soccermoms instead of 15 year old teens on fortnite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Means the same thing as tryhard except used by 30 something soccermoms instead of 15 year old teens on fortnite.

I just asked my kid what a try hard was and he said someone who thinks he is better and competitive but is actually not better and everyone dislikes him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Means the same thing as tryhard except used by 30 something soccermoms instead of 15 year old teens on fortnite.

I just asked my kid what a try hard was and he said someone who thinks he is better and competitive but is actually not better and everyone dislikes him.

I think we used to call this person a "tool."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Means the same thing as tryhard except used by 30 something soccermoms instead of 15 year old teens on fortnite.

I just asked my kid what a try hard was and he said someone who thinks he is better and competitive but is actually not better and everyone dislikes him.

I think we used to call this person a "tool."

I thought a tool was an unpopular person who was taken advantage of.

[Anonymous]

I just asked my kid what a try hard was and he said someone who thinks he is better and competitive but is actually not better and everyone dislikes him.

This! They try hard but take shameless shortcuts. Lack ethics and morals. Also think they're there when they're not there where they want to be. It's the whole 'fake it 'til you make it" mentality. Usually they act like dipshits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone who upsets a WASP who's annoyed that their way of life is going the way of the dinosaurs.

Like new money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A hard worker finds something they love to do and work at it because they love it and are successful.

A striver looks at what others do to gain money and/or power and they try to imitate it.

A striver finds out what all the check boxes are for success and try to check all the boxes.

My son, for example, loves to play the trumpet and he excelled at it. He begged me to practice and we begged him to stop. 😀 He got a scholarship to a top university because of his passion. He as kss as I pl as us 10 other instruments but not as well.

Other kids hated playing an instrument but did because they thought it would help with college admissions. They checked every box... SAT prep.., check, instrument check, sport... check ... volunteer, check. None with more EC’s, better SATs, higher GPA got into as better university. They are going to a great colleges and they are fine with where they ended up (their parents... not so much). But they (thr parents) all bemoan that my son with just Trumpet 🎺 got into a better college.

This is basically what 10:19 was talking about.

+ 1. The PP uses the term to talk down others who work smart because (s)he doesn't like it. what's wrong with imitating others to become rich of be more successful?

The world is not black and white.

There is no right and wrong here.

Strivers tough through stuff they hate to get money and/or power.

Others work hard at things they love whether money and/or power follows doesn’t matter to them. It might it might not.

I think striving for money and/or power will bring you unhappiness spiritually/emotionally. I don’t think it’s wrong it’s just that there are decisions and consequences... if you know the consequences and are good with them, go for it.

All this shows is your own arrogance and short-sightedness. Working hard to get into the best college you can isn't inherently about money and power. You don't know all of these other kids, and you have no idea what passions they may have that they want to pursue in college at the highest level they can. If playing an instrument is something they have to tough out to boost their applications so they can do the thing they really want to do, that's not "striving," that's doing the hard work it takes to pursue your dreams even when it's not fun or interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A hard worker finds something they love to do and work at it because they love it and are successful.

A striver looks at what others do to gain money and/or power and they try to imitate it.

A striver finds out what all the check boxes are for success and try to check all the boxes.

My son, for example, loves to play the trumpet and he excelled at it. He begged me to practice and we begged him to stop. 😀 He got a scholarship to a top university because of his passion. He as kss as I pl as us 10 other instruments but not as well.

Other kids hated playing an instrument but did because they thought it would help with college admissions. They checked every box... SAT prep.., check, instrument check, sport... check ... volunteer, check. None with more EC’s, better SATs, higher GPA got into as better university. They are going to a great colleges and they are fine with where they ended up (their parents... not so much). But they (thr parents) all bemoan that my son with just Trumpet 🎺 got into a better college.

This is basically what 10:19 was talking about.

+ 1. The PP uses the term to talk down others who work smart because (s)he doesn't like it. what's wrong with imitating others to become rich of be more successful?

The world is not black and white.

There is no right and wrong here.

Strivers tough through stuff they hate to get money and/or power.

Others work hard at things they love whether money and/or power follows doesn’t matter to them. It might it might not.

I think striving for money and/or power will bring you unhappiness spiritually/emotionally. I don’t think it’s wrong it’s just that there are decisions and consequences... if you know the consequences and are good with them, go for it.

All this shows is your own arrogance and short-sightedness. Working hard to get into the best college you can isn't inherently about money and power. You don't know all of these other kids, and you have no idea what passions they may have that they want to pursue in college at the highest level they can. If playing an instrument is something they have to tough out to boost their applications so they can do the thing they really want to do, that's not "striving," that's doing the hard work it takes to pursue your dreams even when it's not fun or interesting.

Yes I actually know the kids my kids are friends with and their parents. Typical striver response. You don’t get to know the kids in your child’s band/orchestra/team/class? It’s just a means to an end?

Really you should work on your personal relationship skills.