Sex on the first date...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I went out last night with a guy I really like. We met through friends and hit it off. It was a first date and I slept with him. I’m a little nervous that I ruined my chances at a good thing. He seems interested with texting me If I want to get together again tonight, but I’m worried he sees me now as just sex. I don’t sleep around but it’s been a very long time and it just felt right. I did drink some wine ( not enough to get me drunk) but I really wanted to. The sex was very good and very dirty. I don’t know if I should just let things play out or talk with I’m tonight about wanting something serious again? We both said we are looking for relationship at dinner last night.

And you have one, all about sex.

[Anonymous]

Gross

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just let it play out

I recently had a similar experience, but we didn't say we wanted a serious relationship first. I do wonder if we should have waited, but he thinks that's ridiculous. We've gone out a few more times and he texts most days. The sex is fun, even if it goes nowhere.

If the sex was good and you are still talking about other stuff, then it's probably fine. You don't want someone who is going to be judgmental for doing the same thing he did!

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

OP, go read the thread on how people met their spouses. Some sex on the first nighters! :-

[Anonymous]

I think in the middle of a pandemic people are sex starved. It could be a funny story one day when you are married. I wouldn’t stress about it. I would probably say I don’t sleep around on a first date but I haven’t had sex since this pandemic. He may have felt similarly assuming you guys have been single this whole time.

[Anonymous]

DH and I had sex on first date - married 33 years. It's not a biggie if it's the right person. In fact, DH still brings that date up from time to time.

[Anonymous]

My wife and I had sex on the first date. If he's the type of guy that categorizes women by how quickly they "put out", do you really want to pursue something with him?

You're obviously ok with having sex on the first date with someone you want to be serious with, you should be seeking someone who shares similar values. If he now envisions you as only good for "hooking up", he doesn't share your values and is not the right guy for you (at least outside of sex). No real loss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

Disagree if she ( or he) wants to slow things down now it's fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

Disagree if she ( or he) wants to slow things down now it's fine.

Let’s see how that works out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

Disagree if she ( or he) wants to slow things down now it's fine.

Let’s see how that works out.

A yes to sex once is not a liscense for sex every single time you meet.

[Anonymous]

OP,

The most important thing in a relationship is being yourself. That’s what you did and I wish you luck. Just know that if the relationship doesn’t pan out, it’s not about you and how “you” slept with him on the first date. It’s about how the two of you were not in fact compatible. You deserve someone who would have sex with you on the first date and continue to want to sleep with you.

I also find it helpful to view situations by mixing the gender. Given that you are Herero, do you imagine a man questioning sleeping with a woman in the first date and wondering if she still wants him? No. Instead of it didn’t work out, he would likely just think it wasn’t meant to be. You are entitled to the same sexual confidence even you you are a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

Disagree if she ( or he) wants to slow things down now it's fine.

Let’s see how that works out.

A yes to sex once is not a liscense for sex every single time you meet.

And not slowing down doesn’t mean you have sex every single time you meet, drama llama.


OP - let things happen naturally, whatever that means. You know better than anyone here. There are a million things you can judge a person about. This is not something you or he are judging about the other. Don’t make a big deal out of it. Be honest if you want, but don’t come up with some weird arbitrary rule that could snuff out a good opportunity for real chemistry and connection. See where it goes. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

Disagree if she ( or he) wants to slow things down now it's fine.

Let’s see how that works out.

A yes to sex once is not a liscense for sex every single time you meet.

And not slowing down doesn’t mean you have sex every single time you meet, drama llama.


OP - let things happen naturally, whatever that means. You know better than anyone here. There are a million things you can judge a person about. This is not something you or he are judging about the other. Don’t make a big deal out of it. Be honest if you want, but don’t come up with some weird arbitrary rule that could snuff out a good opportunity for real chemistry and connection. See where it goes. Good luck.

Nice try . The only dramatic one is you.

OP avoid this guy sex or no sex if he's as sneaky and manipulative as pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

Disagree if she ( or he) wants to slow things down now it's fine.

Let’s see how that works out.

A yes to sex once is not a liscense for sex every single time you meet.

And not slowing down doesn’t mean you have sex every single time you meet, drama llama.


OP - let things happen naturally, whatever that means. You know better than anyone here. There are a million things you can judge a person about. This is not something you or he are judging about the other. Don’t make a big deal out of it. Be honest if you want, but don’t come up with some weird arbitrary rule that could snuff out a good opportunity for real chemistry and connection. See where it goes. Good luck.

If you actually believed that you wouldn't have typed your initial statement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t try walking it back to “let’s go slow” because that won’t fly.

This. The cat is out of the bag...and that is fine.

And why not? Why do you act like OP would be lying if she siad she want to dial back on the sex.