Let Wife Decide?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're buying her the home? Meaning she doesn't work and didn't bring any assets into the marriage?

OP here. We are buying a home. She works but I make more than her.

Then you are not buying her a home.

+1, exactly

The audacity of men...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why has she fallen in love with it and why do you think the other house is better? This is the kind of question that requires knowing the pros and cons of both choices.

OP here. She prefers the layout to the other home. Her choice is a little smaller ( not by much) than the home I want. I like the floors and the layout of the bedrooms more in the other house. She prefers the layout and floors in the other home. She likes that her choice has a fireplace. Both are very nice and not much of a difference bedroom or size wise.

You mention her choice is a condo. Is yours?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH here. Absolutely many times over.

This. Great husband.

[Anonymous]

You are not buying her a home. Sheesh.

Yes, absolutely go with her choice since she feels so strongly and you don't.

Again, you are not buying her a home.

[Anonymous]

In our marriage, we have an "enthusiasm wins" approach. So, you like one house a little more than the other. But she LOVES one house. So she should win.

Genders and income shouldn't matter here. If you LOVED one house, and she liked one a little more, then go with the one you love.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why has she fallen in love with it and why do you think the other house is better? This is the kind of question that requires knowing the pros and cons of both choices.

OP here. She prefers the layout to the other home. Her choice is a little smaller ( not by much) than the home I want. I like the floors and the layout of the bedrooms more in the other house. She prefers the layout and floors in the other home. She likes that her choice has a fireplace. Both are very nice and not much of a difference bedroom or size wise.

In this case, yes, I’d go with what she likes better.

[Anonymous]

If you really don't care that much then I'd definitely go with her preference. How would you want to be treated if it were you who cared more?

Happy wife happy life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In our marriage, we have an "enthusiasm wins" approach. So, you like one house a little more than the other. But she LOVES one house. So she should win.

Genders and income shouldn't matter here. If you LOVED one house, and she liked one a little more, then go with the one you love.

I like this way of putting it. Go with this.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Happy wife, happy life, as the saying goes.

It's a saying for a reason!

[Anonymous]

This is so crazy. Why would this be crowd-sourced? This is how compromises work. You give a little when someone else cares a lot, they do the same for you on another thing.

[Anonymous]

don't fall into the trap of "happy wife happy life" when it comes to buying things some else wants.
Also you are getting biased opinion on this website.


Assuming you are each contributing the same proportion of you income towards the home then fairness says each of your votes should be weighted according to your contribution. In other words, you make more so you contribute more so your vote carries more weight. No different than owners in a business where one owner has a greater % ownership share.

[Anonymous]

Yes you should!

[Anonymous]

Of course! Happy wife, happy life. I’ve been married a long time and whenever my wife has a stronger preference about something then I do we go with her preference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your preference is only slight, then yes. If you have a strong preference, I would say to keep looking.

+1

[Anonymous]

Happy wife happy life is a really sexist saying. Toxic masculinity at its finest.


However OP it doesn't sound like that is what you are doing. You are considering both people's feelings and hers are stronger. I agree with others that when one person has no strong feelings and the ther does, the stronger feelings lead.