If you're from a big family, 4 + kids do you have or want a big family yourself?

Anonymous
I would not. I think the only reason I'd have more than 2 is if I spontaneously became pregnant with triplets. I did not have a positive experience growing up as 1 od4, and I think many of the issues we had as a family, and as individuals was due to there being too many kids.
The "big family" moments you can capture with you camera or whatever just aren't owrth the neglect IMO.
Anonymous
My parents had 4 kids. None of us want a large family. I have the most kids - 2. Two of my siblings have one each, and one is childless by choice.

Our mom died when we were young. We learned that it's important to only have as many kids as you or your spouse can raise solo.
Anonymous
I'm an only child, DH is one of six. We always joked we would split the difference and have 3, but now that we have 2 I'm not so sure. I HATED being an only child and dreamt of having a large family myself someday to make up for that, but seeing how my attention is torn with only two I can't imagine each kid getting even less of my time.

Truthfully if we were to have more I'd rather lean into it and have another 2.
Anonymous
I have 3 siblings. 2 have no kids and are very happy with their carefree lifestyles. 1 has 3 kids and struggling with parenting. I have one and feel like it is the best of both worlds. No way I would have more than 2.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'm an only child, DH is one of six. We always joked we would split the difference and have 3, but now that we have 2 I'm not so sure. I HATED being an only child and dreamt of having a large family myself someday to make up for that, but seeing how my attention is torn with only two I can't imagine each kid getting even less of my time.

Truthfully if we were to have more I'd rather lean into it and have another 2.


I was an only child and lived with my aunt for a couple years that had 4 kids. I hated it. The chaos, messiness, lack of attention, fighting was too much. Yes, it was fun sometimes, but I definitely needed more order in my life. I guess it really depends on personality. I also have an only as a result and she is quite relieved to come home after spending time with her friends that have a lot of people in their family.
Anonymous
From a large family, have a small family, did not want a big family.
Anonymous
My DH is 1 of 5. We have 3 kids, but only planned for 2.

He feels big families mean more problems. Which is partly true. We ar
Anonymous
The world is made for families with 2 or 3 kids these days. 4+ starts getting complicated.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:The world is made for families with 2 or 3 kids these days. 4+ starts getting complicated.


So true. My DH and his 8 siblings in his Irish-Catholic, working class family all went to parochial k-8 and Catholic high school in the 1970s. His parents could not have done that today.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My DH is 1 of 5. We have 3 kids, but only planned for 2.

He feels big families mean more problems. Which is partly true. We ar


Same, same. One of 5 kids, parents were each one of 10 and one of 11. Of the 5 kids they have 3, 2, 2, 1, and 1. The first three of those are in college so that's not changing, potential for the ones to become twos but nothing more than that. Everyone seems "happy enough" with their upbringing but none chose to replicate it.
Anonymous
When /where I grew up it was not unusual to have 4-5-6 kids, but most had 3.

My bestie grew up 1 of 5 but she only had 2 kids of her own. The eldest daughter had 1, eldest son had 5, middle son none, my bestie with 2 and youngest boy had 3.

I was one of 3 and loved it. My older sister had 1, I have 3, brother has none. I if were single like my sister I would have been done at 1. I had 3 because I was/am in a strong marriage.
Anonymous
Family of 8, with 6 kids. We had many fights but closer as adults. Many financial issues that are still present today. Very fine with 1.
Anonymous
I was the middle of seven children and loved being part of a big family but my mother was a SAHM who devoted every hour to her children. We have three and I’m very content.
Anonymous
I’m the youngest of four, DH is the middle of three, and we have an only child. I have no desire to have more kids. My parents couldn’t afford four and that greatly influences my feelings about big families. I am delighted not to have to double expenses for things like childcare, activities, and especially college.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I’m the youngest of four, DH is the middle of three, and we have an only child. I have no desire to have more kids. My parents couldn’t afford four and that greatly influences my feelings about big families. I am delighted not to have to double expenses for things like childcare, activities, and especially college.


Same here, stopped at 2 for us. Grew up poor, wanted more opportunities and fun childhood for my kids.
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