When your kid doesn’t want you at Move-In

[Anonymous]

Most dorms do not have elevators. They have stairs.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know. I only wanted one parent at move in and it was the parent I was less close to. I didn’t want the parent I was (and am) closer to (and have a more fraught relationship with) there because it made the whole process too sad, and I wanted to feel excited.

Just something to think about.

Also, as a side note, my relationship with my mom sucked when I was a kid. It has truly blossomed as an adult. Don’t give up hope on having that kind of intimacy. It’s great that you’re self-aware, which many people are not.

[Anonymous]

I would have preferred my dad there. My dad was just generally a very calm and unassuming "roll with it and trust your kids if they're good kids" person while my mom is more high-strung. If we forgot something, dad would just tell me to make a list and email it to him versus freaking out. Dad also is a MUCH better/more confident driver than mom.

[Anonymous]

My daughter didn’t say that but she did tell me not to cry when we were saying goodbye. She’s also politely told us to leave at a certain point “well I'm all set; thanks for helping me, have a good flight “. She’s couldn’t wait to get her independence on! She’s facetimed us the next night and talked for an hour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: What is needed at college that a mom cannot lift?

Did you ever live in a dorm or did you just move right in to a furnished hotel?

[Anonymous]

Walking around all day in a robe doesn't strike me as glamorous but okay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Walking around all day in a robe doesn't strike me as glamorous but okay.

Oops wrong thread.

[Anonymous]

DH is 6'4" and is comfortable driving a large SUV/truck in the city and is a very efficient person when it comes to these things. He is much more useful in a moving situation than I am. I'd be happy to let him go instead of me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: What is needed at college that a mom cannot lift?

Did you ever live in a dorm or did you just move right in to a furnished hotel?

I lived in a dorm and had a mini fridge. I was and still am perfectly capable of carrying a mini fridge or a suit case. I just did not know what items were so heavy that it was thought a grown woman could not carry them. We just have different opinions or capabilities regarding mom strength. All good.

[Anonymous]

I was an absolute shit about moving in to college, 22 years ago! Made my mom cry. Luckily she never brings it up, haha. OP, nurse your wounds and let it go. This is normal late teen separation stuff.

[Anonymous]

During a typical year, freshman have specific time to move in. When you pull up to the unloading zone. a few upperclassmen are there to help. They unload EVERYTHING from the car and have the driver move to another location to park. At that point, the student goes to a line to get their room key. It’s nice to have 3rd person to stay with the belongings until dad returns from parking. 3 people is a must (for me) even if they only allow 2 into the dorm room.

[Anonymous]

Don’t worry, your kid’s college will announce online only in the next two weeks.

[Anonymous]

Are you divorced? It can be really stressful for kids to have to juggle both divorced parents at once. I'm sure there will be other occasions where you can celebrate college with your kid. Move-in isn't terribly exciting. You just drop them off, if you're doing it right. The whole idea is to get away quickly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was an absolute shit about moving in to college, 22 years ago! Made my mom cry. Luckily she never brings it up, haha. OP, nurse your wounds and let it go. This is normal late teen separation stuff.

This! Hugs to OP.

[Anonymous]

At 17 I was still super embarrassed of my parents.