Everyone in family wants a dog--except for me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope. Kids can get dogs after they've grown up and moved out.

This.

Stand strong

[Anonymous]

I was you. I finally gave in two months ago. I have mostly held my ground - my husband gets up every morning with the dog, and is also the one doing the training.

For us, though, the dog has been a really nice addition (I'll even admit that!) We also have a cat, and the two are doing fine. We got a lab mix puppy. Biggest issue has been the mouthing/jumping, but that seems to have gotten much better over time.

[Anonymous]

I was in the “No” camp for years because I knew I wouldn’t get any help and the last thing I needed was someone else to take care of - especially because unlike children, the dog will never become more self sufficient. However, my kids are older now and actually are helpful. We’re in the process of adopting a retired racing greyhound. Greyhounds don’t shed a ton, require little grooming, don’t usually bark a lot, and don’t require a ton of exercise. They’re not susceptible to hip dysplasia and bloat, like other large breeds. Retired racers come already crate trained. They do need frequent tooth brushing, and they need training because they’ve never used stairs, don’t know that windows are solid, and they don’t know what’s expected of them as a pet (they’ve never played with toys!) but they usually learn pretty quickly and become very loving. I’m excited to get a dog now, but I couldn’t have handled it in the past.

It’s good that you know yourself and what you can handle and enjoy, as well as what you can’t. I’m so glad I didn’t get a dog when I didn’t want one.

[Anonymous]

My boring old Labrador is super mellow and never barks. I think we just lucked out.

[Anonymous]

I was you OP and I held out for years. I love animals but didn’t want the responsibility. I finally gave in and we’ve had our dog for several years now- I am his person and I absolutely adore him. He has really added a lot to our lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boring old Labrador is super mellow and never barks. I think we just lucked out.

When did s/he get out of the puppy stage?

[Anonymous]

OP, my family acquired a dog in March and our pup is somewhere between 1-2 years old. She has a terrific temperament and is great with the kids, calm in the house, housebroken, and doesn't chew or bark or jump. She has been a really positive addition to our house during this weird time and given the kids something happy to focus on. And she's forced our household to maintain a good quarantine.

However, despite passing the "cat test" at the shelter, she only wants to chase our 5-year-old cat. So now we have a downstairs dog and upstairs cat. I get up at 6am 3 times a week to walk the dog (my husband does the other days). If/when we go back to working in offices, we will likely hire a midday dog walker or I'll cut my work hours to be home more (was planning to do this already with tween kids).

We love the dog and she's been a great fit, but if you are not fully on-board with the work (and I wouldn't be in your situation, with a husband who doesn't pull his household weight), I wouldn't do it.

[Anonymous]

Don't get a dog unless everyone is all in, including you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the mom. My kids desperately want a dog, and I know my husband does too, though he doesn't take their side against me. We live in a small houes, and already have two cats. I've never had a dog but my husband grew up with them and had several as an adult before we met. I feel terrible saying no, but I know I will get stuck dealing with all the unpleasant aspects of having a dog--cleaning up poop in the backyard, walking it early in the morning etc. Plus I worry about the cats--what if they don't get along with a dog? Plus we would probably have to hire a dog walker once we go back to school and work, which is an expense I don't want to add right now.
Am I a horrible person?

You are not a horrible person but, my kids wanted a dog and my husband was for it too. I knew it would be mostly me but, I said yes when they were 9 and 11. But now? It has been nine years and I really love this dog. The dog has bonded to me and it is basically my dog. During the quarantine I've kept sane by walking the dog. I don't mind cleaning up her poop because she is my dog. Sort of like changing my kids' diapers but, wouldn't want to change a stranger's baby.

Also, my dog lives with cats. We had an older cat that she used to chase but, when he died we got a few cats when kittens. One of my cats is in love with her. She rubs against her and follows her. My dog is older but, does not chase any of them. They get along beautifully. If you do get a dog do not get a dog that herds or is in their nature to chase. My dog is a mutt. We think part lab, chow, retriever.

If you don't want a dog than don't but, you may enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the mom. My kids desperately want a dog, and I know my husband does too, though he doesn't take their side against me. We live in a small houes, and already have two cats. I've never had a dog but my husband grew up with them and had several as an adult before we met. I feel terrible saying no, but I know I will get stuck dealing with all the unpleasant aspects of having a dog--cleaning up poop in the backyard, walking it early in the morning etc. Plus I worry about the cats--what if they don't get along with a dog? Plus we would probably have to hire a dog walker once we go back to school and work, which is an expense I don't want to add right now.
Am I a horrible person?

You are not a horrible person but, my kids wanted a dog and my husband was for it too. I knew it would be mostly me but, I said yes when they were 9 and 11. But now? It has been nine years and I really love this dog. The dog has bonded to me and it is basically my dog. During the quarantine I've kept sane by walking the dog. I don't mind cleaning up her poop because she is my dog. Sort of like changing my kids' diapers but, wouldn't want to change a stranger's baby.

Also, my dog lives with cats. We had an older cat that she used to chase but, when he died we got a few cats when kittens. One of my cats is in love with her. She rubs against her and follows her. My dog is older but, does not chase any of them. They get along beautifully. If you do get a dog do not get a dog that herds or is in their nature to chase. My dog is a mutt. We think part lab, chow, retriever.

If you don't want a dog than don't but, you may enjoy it.

Forgot to add we got her when she was 2. I knew I couldn't do a puppy Got her from Lucky dogs

[Anonymous]

Owning a pet doesn’t work if the main caregiver is not on board. It is a lot of work.

[Anonymous]

Try fostering a dog. Make your husband do the work. When he doesn't, tell him that's the reason you are not getting a dog permanently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try fostering a dog. Make your husband do the work. When he doesn't, tell him that's the reason you are not getting a dog permanently.

+1

You don't have to get a puppy - they are a lot of work and training them is a pain in the ass. Why don't you get an adult (1-2+) that's already potty trained?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was you OP and I held out for years. I love animals but didn’t want the responsibility. I finally gave in and we’ve had our dog for several years now- I am his person and I absolutely adore him. He has really added a lot to our lives.

Me too. The dog has enriched each of our lives. It’s work but the reward is big.

[Anonymous]

We got a dog a couple of years ago because I was willing to do most (all) of the work, since I knew that's how it would play out. Before Covid we also had someone working at home the majority of the time, so the dog wasn't always alone all day long. The dog is now everyone's favorite family member and has brought a new light into everyone's eyes. She is a real joy, and especially now that we're stuck at home, having the dog is wonderful.

If you're not willing to do most of the work, I think you're being realistic in not getting a dog. No matter how much everyone makes promises, the work will mostly fall on you. And with two cats you already have pets in the house, which we didn't.