Summer camp dilemma - wwyd

[Anonymous]

It depends on how truly stressed she’s been, OP. I also have an eight year old daughter, and she was so, so miserable for the first 7 weeks of the pandemic, before we started socially distant interactions at our local field. She has two younger brothers, but truly needs true peer interaction, at least IMO. She went from multiple meltdowns/day to typical mood variability; the difference was night and day.

I’d be inclined to let her go, and probably split things up as PP suggested (with one parent going back with her). Mental health absolutely matters, and I think it’s important to consider that Fall won’t provide significant play opportunities for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how truly stressed she’s been, OP. I also have an eight year old daughter, and she was so, so miserable for the first 7 weeks of the pandemic, before we started socially distant interactions at our local field. She has two younger brothers, but truly needs true peer interaction, at least IMO. She went from multiple meltdowns/day to typical mood variability; the difference was night and day.

I’d be inclined to let her go, and probably split things up as PP suggested (with one parent going back with her). Mental health absolutely matters, and I think it’s important to consider that Fall won’t provide significant play opportunities for her.

DP. "Socially distant interactions at our local field" is a world apart from OP taking the DD all the way back home to attend a camp that will surely not be anywhere near as socially distanced as your child playing in a field with a few others. A field that's local to you. You're not uprooting the plans and going elsewhere for weeks to make the interactions happen. It's nice that your kid can do that, and too bad that OP's can't get to camp, but these are not "essential" things, mental health claims or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would let her go to camp. Mental health is important too.

Same here

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely not. You don't let kids do something bad for their health jut because they want to do it. That's what being a parent is.

Kids do lots of things that are potentially bad for their health (riding in a car, for example) but we allow them because the benefits outweigh the risks.

[Anonymous]

Is there a local camp she can attend?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there a local camp she can attend?

This is what I would look for, or, start trying to set up some socially distanced playdates with local kids, so she can make some friends. I don't think she should dictate your plans, but, I do think that it would be nice for her to have some other kids to interact with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a local camp she can attend?

This is what I would look for, or, start trying to set up some socially distanced playdates with local kids, so she can make some friends. I don't think she should dictate your plans, but, I do think that it would be nice for her to have some other kids to interact with.

Unfortunately camps are not opening where we are and honestly we haven’t really seen any other kids around to even remotely interact with. It’s more country where we are and parks are still closed so think it’s highly unlikely we will meet others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would let her go to camp. Mental health is important too.

Same here

+2

+3

[Anonymous]

I would let her go to camp. That’s a lot of isolation for an 8 year old.

[Anonymous]

Why did you tell her the camp was open? An almost 8 year old wouldn’t know this on her own.

I’d look for local camps.

[Anonymous]

We're skipping camp for our third grader and so are most families we know. If she's alone, a lot of other kids her age will be in the same boat.

[Anonymous]

I would not do a camp near your parents because that is unfair to them, puts them at extra risk.

What kind of precautions is the camp taking? If it is mostly outdoors, I would consider it. If it is indoors, just ask yourself if it is worth the risk of COVID? For our family it would not be, because DH has health issues and we have one special needs kid who needs us both to live a long time. But, honestly, if it was just my teenager and DH's health were better, I might consider it.

Could one parent take her and the other stay at your parents?

Or what about online camps? Either with friends or random kids? Outschool.com has interactive ones.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how truly stressed she’s been, OP. I also have an eight year old daughter, and she was so, so miserable for the first 7 weeks of the pandemic, before we started socially distant interactions at our local field. She has two younger brothers, but truly needs true peer interaction, at least IMO. She went from multiple meltdowns/day to typical mood variability; the difference was night and day.

I’d be inclined to let her go, and probably split things up as PP suggested (with one parent going back with her). Mental health absolutely matters, and I think it’s important to consider that Fall won’t provide significant play opportunities for her.

DP. "Socially distant interactions at our local field" is a world apart from OP taking the DD all the way back home to attend a camp that will surely not be anywhere near as socially distanced as your child playing in a field with a few others. A field that's local to you. You're not uprooting the plans and going elsewhere for weeks to make the interactions happen. It's nice that your kid can do that, and too bad that OP's can't get to camp, but these are not "essential" things, mental health claims or not.

And if I could have sent my eight year old back to camp, as OP proposes, I absolutely would. If her camp opens this summer, she'll go back. I sure as hell wouldn't continue to isolate a kid who is unhappy that way (recognizing that not all kids are).

Also, yes. Social interaction is, for many kids, absolutely essential to healthy development. You can stick your head in the sand all you want, or think that mental health isn't a thing, or whatever, but you are incorrect on that one.

[Anonymous]

I have an almost 8yo DD. WE have been good as far as social distancing. We have met friend sin very small groups and only for bike rides or outside playdates. No one has been in our house and we havent been in anyone elses. Spouse and I do both work outside the home. We wear masks when inside but not outside when hiking or biking.

My DD is going to an outdoor camp here ( moco) for 2 weeks from 9-3. I am happy with the precautions they are taking and think that a break from what has become our nromal will be good for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends on how truly stressed she’s been, OP. I also have an eight year old daughter, and she was so, so miserable for the first 7 weeks of the pandemic, before we started socially distant interactions at our local field. She has two younger brothers, but truly needs true peer interaction, at least IMO. She went from multiple meltdowns/day to typical mood variability; the difference was night and day.

I’d be inclined to let her go, and probably split things up as PP suggested (with one parent going back with her). Mental health absolutely matters, and I think it’s important to consider that Fall won’t provide significant play opportunities for her.

DP. "Socially distant interactions at our local field" is a world apart from OP taking the DD all the way back home to attend a camp that will surely not be anywhere near as socially distanced as your child playing in a field with a few others. A field that's local to you. You're not uprooting the plans and going elsewhere for weeks to make the interactions happen. It's nice that your kid can do that, and too bad that OP's can't get to camp, but these are not "essential" things, mental health claims or not.

And if I could have sent my eight year old back to camp, as OP proposes, I absolutely would. If her camp opens this summer, she'll go back. I sure as hell wouldn't continue to isolate a kid who is unhappy that way (recognizing that not all kids are).

Also, yes. Social interaction is, for many kids, absolutely essential to healthy development. You can stick your head in the sand all you want, or think that mental health isn't a thing, or whatever, but you are incorrect on that one.

One summer of living with the grandparents in the country where things are not very exciting and other kids aren't local -- which is what OP describes, look it up above in the thread -- is not going to damage her child irrevocably. Why do you think that is the case? Do you think no child has ever spent a boring summer like that? Or that children who did are somehow damaged?

OP did not say her child is somehow emotionally fragile or ill. Her child is disappointed and mad that she cannot do what she had looked forward to doing this summer. That's sad. It is not something to pathologize as a mental health issue. Doing so cheapens real mental health issues.

And don't presume you know that I or anyone thinks "mental health isn't a thing." Wow. Presumptious of you. Like I said: You are cheapening the idea of actual mental health when you and other parents try to make boredom into a mental health problem. OP and her family can step it up to do more AS a family and I'm sure they will. Like people have forever.