Can't stop thinking about children in unsafe homes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am really worried and kind of freaking out about the uptick of abuse going on in households amid the quarantine. Hotline calls for help from children are going up. I read the news story of finding that one child who had been locked up in a shed, in the dark since the start of the quarantine. These kids no longer have life lines and contact with the outside world because they are kept home from school with no protection.

Is there anything being done to address this? Should there be someone from the school checking in on these children?

In Montgomery County, if a teacher is concerned about a child who's not doing work or otherwise checking in on distance learning, the teacher can request that a police officer conduct a wellness check at the home. I assume this isn't just for kids who aren't checking in, but rather that there were some concerns in place before we switched to distance learning. But I could be wrong. I just happen to have a kid who refuses to do the online office hour check ins, and no cop has showed up at my door yet....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately this is just an extension of what homeschooling advocates have already put into place. Homeschooling is already hiding a lot of child abuse, and those children are largely unreachable, thanks to advocacy by HSLDA and other homeschooling and religious groups. It's a travesty, but was a travesty pre-coronavirus.

Yes, it was, but now kids who were in enrolled in public schools are having to be at home. So before it was the extreme, systematic abuse of kids - like the family that had their 12 kids chained to beds and tortured and starved them in California.

Now we are talking about the kids who would be at school but at home with parents under stress, and like the teacher said above, poor parenting skills.

[Anonymous]

I think about all the kids who are getting screamed at or worse because their parents are incredibly stressed (rightly so) from being out of work and maybe spending hours everyday trying to deal with unemployment/small business loan/etc.

[Anonymous]

Precisely why schools need to open. The “cure” has become worse than the disease.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately this is just an extension of what homeschooling advocates have already put into place. Homeschooling is already hiding a lot of child abuse, and those children are largely unreachable, thanks to advocacy by HSLDA and other homeschooling and religious groups. It's a travesty, but was a travesty pre-coronavirus.

Yes, it was, but now kids who were in enrolled in public schools are having to be at home. So before it was the extreme, systematic abuse of kids - like the family that had their 12 kids chained to beds and tortured and starved them in California.

Now we are talking about the kids who would be at school but at home with parents under stress, and like the teacher said above, poor parenting skills.

There are more kids now, but I think you are discounting just how widespread this was pre-covid. It wasn't just like the family in California - there were plenty of kids with parents under stress and poor parenting skills. Unfortunately, there are more of them now.

[Anonymous]

My child was recently at a psychiatric facility (ok now) -- and the thing I was *most* struck by were the # of kids who said (one in passing as I walked by, the others in group sessions with my child) that they attempted suicide because their parents/siblings urged them to do so. I cannot get that out of my mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The worst is that the current motto is keep the family intact at all costs. Children basically don't have rights and aren't seen as equal with their parents rights.

Kids can be flagged multiple times, get calls from mandatory reporters, be taken into foster care and their parents take a few classes and the kid is back in their care.

Kids are easy targets because they are easy to blame, easy to overpower, etc. There is still no one to protect them because at the end of the day, the courts/state don't have the funds to house them nor the people available to foster hence the emphasis on parental rights and "keeping the family intact".

Its sickening. I look at my son some days and think how lucky he is, how lucky we are and know there are children who haven't felt love or safety or trust. And that missing those isn't the worst of it. On top of that there are kids who literally get beat and assaulted by family/relatives/etc.

No, that's not "the worst." The worst (or equally bad) is taking a kid from a good parent based on bad evidence and sending them to foster care.

[Anonymous]

ME TOO.

That’s why they shouldn’t even be ENTERTAINING the thought of kids not returning to school.

Imagine these poor babies stuck in a room. School is better. Take the chance. Get the SAFE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the coronavirus shutdown situation is really illuminating the fact that we are expecting schools (and barely anything else) to solve all the problems of poverty.

[phone]

[Anonymous]

This is a sad situation. I think it's easy to blame stressed parents or bad parenting skills, and it sounds like many of you are blaming people in poverty. (Btw, I work in education and there are plenty of UC/UMC parents with poor parenting skills.) Now, while there is no excuse for abuse, it benefits the kids to help parents through financial support or other ways during this time. There is a big difference between the parents who lock kids in sheds and those who have no option but to work while kids have limited parental supervision or are stressed and yell occasionally. I feel kids in the latter situation too, but maybe we can do more to help them by supporting the parents and it could make a big difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know, OP. I feel the same way. That is the group I am most worried for.

Me too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know, OP. I feel the same way. That is the group I am most worried for.

Me too.

Me three.

I see my kids and how "small " they are and how easily Dh (and me) can easily overpower them and how scarey and painful that must be for an abused child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the coronavirus shutdown situation is really illuminating the fact that we are expecting schools (and barely anything else) to solve all the problems of poverty.

[phone]

Yup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately this is just an extension of what homeschooling advocates have already put into place. Homeschooling is already hiding a lot of child abuse, and those children are largely unreachable, thanks to advocacy by HSLDA and other homeschooling and religious groups. It's a travesty, but was a travesty pre-coronavirus.

What’s your source for this?

[Anonymous]

Me, too, OP. I worry a lot about children who are hidden from us now, and can’t reach out for help. It is one of the consequences of the pandemic that we need to consider seriously as we plan the future.