Is this a red flag?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You dumped him, right?

Of course I did. Told him he's about to be a lot more bored, lol.

[Anonymous]

Well you aren't exclusive so he has every right to be on Tinder and accepting dates.
You have no cause to be mad etc.

Move on and find someone who wants what you want.

Hint: he's not likely going to be on Tinder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You dumped him, right?

Of course I did. Told him he's about to be a lot more bored, lol.

Good! Now get with a faith community or volunteer group where you can meet better people.

[Anonymous]

How old are you? I agree with his sentiment but I am going against my nature and staying with my husband for the long term because it’s best for me and my family despite my biology.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you? I agree with his sentiment but I am going against my nature and staying with my husband for the long term because it’s best for me and my family despite my biology.

+1 I tend to agree as well, but at the same time I want very badly to enjoy a long happy marriage (I’m 29 and not married). I hope I will, but also acknowledge that it might be very very challenging.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been dating a guy for about three months. All is well.....for the most part.

The one weird thing is that a couple times he's mentioned the 'humans aren't meant to be monogamous' thing. I think he could tell it threw me off because he followed with "but *I* have no problem being committed". I have no issue with non-monogamy, but it's not for me

We haven't really had any exclusivity talks- the one time I brought it up he responded with something like "I'm investing my time in you" which kinda struck me as someone trying to get out of actually committing.

The whole thing just seems weird. Why mention you don't think people are monogamous unless you don't want to be monogamous? I sort of feel like I'm being groomed or set up to eventually hear that he wants to practice non-monogamy.

My gut's telling me that something's off and I should bail or at least distance myself.

start seeing other people, he sounds like a piece of work, not honest and, as you said, not exclusive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been dating a guy for about three months. All is well.....for the most part.

The one weird thing is that a couple times he's mentioned the 'humans aren't meant to be monogamous' thing. I think he could tell it threw me off because he followed with "but *I* have no problem being committed". I have no issue with non-monogamy, but it's not for me

We haven't really had any exclusivity talks- the one time I brought it up he responded with something like "I'm investing my time in you" which kinda struck me as someone trying to get out of actually committing.

The whole thing just seems weird. Why mention you don't think people are monogamous unless you don't want to be monogamous? I sort of feel like I'm being groomed or set up to eventually hear that he wants to practice non-monogamy.

My gut's telling me that something's off and I should bail or at least distance myself.

Glad you dumped him, OP. I just wanted to point out that it wasn't your gut telling you... it was literally him.

[Anonymous]

Perfect time to break it off STAT.

[Anonymous]

Always listen to your gut.

It is rarely if ever, wrong.

[Anonymous]

Dump his a$$. He isn’t worth your time. And you are worth more than how he is treating you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think he told you what he really believes and that is that monogamy isn’t natural for him. You get to decide if you’re ok with that in a relationship.

OP here. That’s what I’m thinking. I just don’t get why he wouldn’t tell me outright.

Women don't get it -- why would be open with you and risk rocking the boat? Men are not as forward as women and more willing to pretend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've been dating a guy for about three months. All is well.....for the most part.

The one weird thing is that a couple times he's mentioned the 'humans aren't meant to be monogamous' thing. I think he could tell it threw me off because he followed with "but *I* have no problem being committed". I have no issue with non-monogamy, but it's not for me

We haven't really had any exclusivity talks- the one time I brought it up he responded with something like "I'm investing my time in you" which kinda struck me as someone trying to get out of actually committing.

The whole thing just seems weird. Why mention you don't think people are monogamous unless you don't want to be monogamous? I sort of feel like I'm being groomed or set up to eventually hear that he wants to practice non-monogamy.

My gut's telling me that something's off and I should bail or at least distance myself.

Glad you dumped him, OP. I just wanted to point out that it wasn't your gut telling you... it was literally him.

Thanks. I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. I was pretty upset yesterday but I'm good now.