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How to change DH's mind on weight?
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Anonymous
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my husband works out about 5 times a week, has built up a lot of muscle and looks the best he has ever looked in his entire life.
meanwhile i never work out (literally never) and eat tons of unhealthy food and love baked goods. i'm not fat, but i ain't skinny. he doesn't bother me about my weight. i know deep inside he thinks i could stand to lose a few pounds (and i agree) but overall he likes the way i look. all this to say... your husband sounds superficial. but just as he can't change you, you can't change him. i'd just do what i could to make a point to him that he's got no right to tell a slim woman she should be skinny. |
Anonymous
| is he in love with your BF? What a jerk! |
Anonymous
| OP---those are perfectly fine measurements. Is he a perfectionist about other things as well---expecting perfect house, etc---so this is as much about control as it is appearance preferences? |
Anonymous
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Is this a joke?
If not, OP, I suspect your husband is abusive. You have close to model measurements. Your husband is an asshole. |
Anonymous
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<I> I think my weight is about right at the moment, I am 5'8" and 129 pounds. The DH keeps harassing me to lose weight... and he obviously is concerned about my looks not my health. </I>
What health issues is he really worried about? If he makes that excuse, ask him flat out. Though with the comparison to your friend, it doesn't sound like he is even pretending it's about your heath. |
Anonymous
| i really hope you don't have daughters. |
Anonymous
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OP: I love the BMI idea! Maybe that will put things in perspective...
And no girls, just a lovely DS! |
Anonymous
Yes, this. I'd like to come over and give your DH what-for. |
Anonymous
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Well, I have to admit that while I think your DH is crossing a line, I have crossed it too on multiple occasions with my DH!
Luckily DH is a perfectionist like I am, and so he took it well - meaning he worked out and ate nearly exactly what I did in order to gain muscle and lose fat (DH and I were both "skinny fat", meaning we looked slim but had terrible eating habits that were bound to catch up with us later). We trained together and it made us look WAY better and be healthier too! OP, the truth is that any desire to be leaner/healthier should come from YOU, and there is no way your DH can put pressure on you if you are not ready for it. So he should respect that and let it go. |
Anonymous
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5'8" and 129?!!!! WTF? I am 4'11" and 128. I am also a size 4 petite. No one looks at me and tells me I need to lose weight. I work out 4 days a week at hard core boot camp at 5:45 in the morning. I also run about 15 miles a week in addition to the boot camp. Granted I truly do have a "big bone" structure and I am very stocky.
At your height and weight I would tell your husband to shove it. He has issues. He either loves you for you or not. His comments are abusive, plain and simple. Seriously, why are you putting up with this? |
Anonymous
| Show him all these responses. That should straighten him out! |
Anonymous
This. |
Anonymous
This squared. And then multiplied by 10 and squared again. Jeez, your DH sounds like a right a-hole. I'd be THRILLED to weigh 129 and I'm not nearly as tall as you. |
Anonymous
| Then, I'd go have an affair with someone who found me attractive. |
Anonymous
| You don't need to change his mind; you need to change yours. Stop trying to please or persuade an a**hole. |