DH didn’t lift a finger today

[Anonymous]

I can't even imagine my spouse behaving this way. Your DH sucks, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm looking for his post where he complains that his wife tried to encourage party guests to beat him to death like he is a pinata, by making him 'hold the rope'.

Hahahahahahahahahahahaa

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enough with these posts. You knew who you married. Next time hire some people to help for the day.

You beat me to it! My goodness. These people knew who they were marrying! They ignored the nice guys who would be doing the helping because of complicated emotional reasons. I get it. It’s ok. But hold the complaints!

You two are clueless. A man (or woman) can be a helpful, supportive partner who does 50% of the work pre-kids, but then can’t deal with the relentless responsibilities and selflessness required by parenting. I married one of these men. He was absolutely unselfish and a super involved, hands-on father the first few years he was a parent, but by the time our kids were in mid-elementary school and he was in his forties, his midlife crisis started and he was just over being a family man. No one saw this coming. He’s like a totally different person now, to the point that if he hadn’t had an MRI, I would suspect something like a brain tumor. He’s barely around our kids any more.

It’s bullsh!t for you to place any blame on the person who did nothing wrong today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enough with these posts. You knew who you married. Next time hire some people to help for the day.

You beat me to it! My goodness. These people knew who they were marrying! They ignored the nice guys who would be doing the helping because of complicated emotional reasons. I get it. It’s ok. But hold the complaints!

You two are clueless. A man (or woman) can be a helpful, supportive partner who does 50% of the work pre-kids, but then can’t deal with the relentless responsibilities and selflessness required by parenting. I married one of these men. He was absolutely unselfish and a super involved, hands-on father the first few years he was a parent, but by the time our kids were in mid-elementary school and he was in his forties, his midlife crisis started and he was just over being a family man. No one saw this coming. He’s like a totally different person now, to the point that if he hadn’t had an MRI, I would suspect something like a brain tumor. He’s barely around our kids any more.

It’s bullsh!t for you to place any blame on the person who did nothing wrong today.

NP. And just curious, why do women stay with men like this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enough with these posts. You knew who you married. Next time hire some people to help for the day.

You beat me to it! My goodness. These people knew who they were marrying! They ignored the nice guys who would be doing the helping because of complicated emotional reasons. I get it. It’s ok. But hold the complaints!

You two are clueless. A man (or woman) can be a helpful, supportive partner who does 50% of the work pre-kids, but then can’t deal with the relentless responsibilities and selflessness required by parenting. I married one of these men. He was absolutely unselfish and a super involved, hands-on father the first few years he was a parent, but by the time our kids were in mid-elementary school and he was in his forties, his midlife crisis started and he was just over being a family man. No one saw this coming. He’s like a totally different person now, to the point that if he hadn’t had an MRI, I would suspect something like a brain tumor. He’s barely around our kids any more.

It’s bullsh!t for you to place any blame on the person who did nothing wrong today.

Lady, that’s what divorce is for. Try it if you’re so unhappy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enough with these posts. You knew who you married. Next time hire some people to help for the day.

You beat me to it! My goodness. These people knew who they were marrying! They ignored the nice guys who would be doing the helping because of complicated emotional reasons. I get it. It’s ok. But hold the complaints!

You two are clueless. A man (or woman) can be a helpful, supportive partner who does 50% of the work pre-kids, but then can’t deal with the relentless responsibilities and selflessness required by parenting. I married one of these men. He was absolutely unselfish and a super involved, hands-on father the first few years he was a parent, but by the time our kids were in mid-elementary school and he was in his forties, his midlife crisis started and he was just over being a family man. No one saw this coming. He’s like a totally different person now, to the point that if he hadn’t had an MRI, I would suspect something like a brain tumor. He’s barely around our kids any more.

It’s bullsh!t for you to place any blame on the person who did nothing wrong today.

This is rare I’m sure. And I bet you’ve adjusted to your new reality right? That was my point. I bet this wasn’t the first time he was useless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enough with these posts. You knew who you married. Next time hire some people to help for the day.

You beat me to it! My goodness. These people knew who they were marrying! They ignored the nice guys who would be doing the helping because of complicated emotional reasons. I get it. It’s ok. But hold the complaints!

You two are clueless. A man (or woman) can be a helpful, supportive partner who does 50% of the work pre-kids, but then can’t deal with the relentless responsibilities and selflessness required by parenting. I married one of these men. He was absolutely unselfish and a super involved, hands-on father the first few years he was a parent, but by the time our kids were in mid-elementary school and he was in his forties, his midlife crisis started and he was just over being a family man. No one saw this coming. He’s like a totally different person now, to the point that if he hadn’t had an MRI, I would suspect something like a brain tumor. He’s barely around our kids any more.

It’s bullsh!t for you to place any blame on the person who did nothing wrong today.

So pack your stuff and go!!

[Anonymous]

I feel like we need more information here. Is your dh regularly like this? Or was this laziness specific to this party?

If specific to this party, it sounds like some serious passive aggressiveness to me. I’d bet you insisted on having a big party for a toddler With tons of kids and adults, and he thought it was a dumb idea from the get go, and you were over the top on micro managing every detail (as demonstrated by the piñata - I men’s, no wonder he doesn’t help if you won’t even let him do that the way he thought of). It sounds like he is seething mad with you and was doing this as an “f you, you insisted on this party, now you can live with the details” kind of thing.

If there’s no background on this other than the fact that your dh is constantly lazy, than he’s just an ass.

Ps hanging a piñata from a stick is amateur hour, and sign of a disorganized party.

[Anonymous]

Why couldn’t he hang the piñata from a tree?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Holding a piñata? While people hit it?

How many kids do you have?

This sounds crazy. Have you ever been hit with a baseball bat? Or stick? or anything? I mean ... toddlers don't hit that hard, but they are wildly inaccurate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Once one person starts saying “I do all the work and she/he does nothing” that marriage is over. Most selfish statement one can make in a marriage.

It’s selfish to notice the situation you’re in? Can’t agree.

I think often it is that the person making that statement isn't noticing that the other party involved actually DOES do stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why couldn’t he hang the piñata from a tree?

This.

Also, did he even want to have this party at your house? If you insisted on a party at home, you do the legwork. You don’t get to just make decisions for everyone and boss them around. Maybe he didn’t want all these people in his space. Maybe he’d rather let some venue do the cleanup. Let me guess. You didn’t give a sh*t for his input.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why couldn’t he hang the piñata from a tree?

This.

Also, did he even want to have this party at your house? If you insisted on a party at home, you do the legwork. You don’t get to just make decisions for everyone and boss them around. Maybe he didn’t want all these people in his space. Maybe he’d rather let some venue do the cleanup. Let me guess. You didn’t give a sh*t for his input.

Oh, I don't know. At some point you have to get on board with your spouse's project. No one likes a sulker.

It does sound like both OP and her husband have some issues.

[Anonymous]

Omg guys. You don’t dangle the piñata. You hold the rope while standing on the other side of the tree instead of tying it to the branch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Once one person starts saying “I do all the work and she/he does nothing” that marriage is over. Most selfish statement one can make in a marriage.

It’s selfish to notice the situation you’re in? Can’t agree.

I think often it is that the person making that statement isn't noticing that the other party involved actually DOES do stuff.

Wives are so self-centered they can't see anything other than their own "suffering". Relationship forum threads are 50% wife bit*hing about DH and the other 50% bit*hing about MIL.