Another bday thread: whole class vs a few friends

[Anonymous]

Ugh, mine won't be 4 until January but is already talking about her party and which friends she'll invite. She just started DC Pre-K and I have NO idea who these kids are, but I HEAR HER on the playground saying "you're my new friend so you can come to my party." We already have 14 kids (friends, neighbors, family) plus parents and baby siblings to invite, we don't have space to double that number! But we have to or she'll be the mean girl telling kids that they weren't invited. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

If you're worried about paying for a lot of kids, there are cheaper options.

If the weather is nice, just have it at a playground. You can get inexpensive cakes at Giant. Get some pizza, juice boxes, and party supplies at Party City. Done.

Things get a little tougher during the winter, but you can still find less expensive places to book, like nature centers.

I just think people should make an effort to be inclusive, especially when kids are younger.

[Anonymous]

We never invite the whole pre-school class, just the children my daughter really talks about. We also invite her non school friends and try to keep the number to about a dozen. I have no interest in getting caught up in inviting the entire class and turning the party into a circus.

[Anonymous]

At this age, kids are still learning to build relationships and friendships. I would invite the whole class, a lot aren't going to show up. You can have this party at a playground. If you don't want to serve pizza then have it at 10 am or 3 pm kinda time, so you can get away with just some snacks and cake. You can still keep your 'fancy' party for close family and friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried about paying for a lot of kids, there are cheaper options.

If the weather is nice, just have it at a playground. You can get inexpensive cakes at Giant. Get some pizza, juice boxes, and party supplies at Party City. Done.

Things get a little tougher during the winter, but you can still find less expensive places to book, like nature centers.

I just think people should make an effort to be inclusive, especially when kids are younger.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At this age, kids are still learning to build relationships and friendships. I would invite the whole class, a lot aren't going to show up. You can have this party at a playground. If you don't want to serve pizza then have it at 10 am or 3 pm kinda time, so you can get away with just some snacks and cake. You can still keep your 'fancy' party for close family and friends.

+1. This early in the year you don't even know who her school friends will be at a brand new school. Not inviting everyone is just asking for an issue. I sort of hate the single gender party, but I do think you can get away with that if you need to to keep #s down... especially if your kid is the type that only plays with one gender. I think you can pick out 2-3 kids to invite, especially if you have a hook like knowing their parents/doing some outside of school activity with them, but more than that is crappy at this age (and, honestly, this early in the year the 2-3 you pick out are likely to be total misses for who she will later wish she had at the party).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since my kids were about 4 or 5, I've let them make the guest list. Sure, I say "what about Britney?" and they say "Oh yeah, definitely have to invite Britney and Lindsey". But they write out their list.

They've never wanted to invite their whole class, and they've always invited more people than are IN their class.

To us, birthday parties are not about money. They're about surrounding yourself with your favorite people to help you celebrate your special day.

This is really crappy unless you're talking about a handful of kids max. If you mean that you let your 4 or 5 year old invite 12-15 kids out of 20, you suck. You especially suck if it's *not* a cost thing and you're inviting more than 20 kids anyway. That is seriously awful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid will never have a party if we have to invite the whole class. Even if you only do pizza, juice boxes, and paper supplies, it adds up for 30+ people. You are fine to invite two OP, but call or email the parents.

You have 30 kids in your preschooler's class?

I was thinking of parents and siblings. Kid is in a class of 12. I can’t imagine serving pizza and making the parents watch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid will never have a party if we have to invite the whole class. Even if you only do pizza, juice boxes, and paper supplies, it adds up for 30+ people. You are fine to invite two OP, but call or email the parents.

You have 30 kids in your preschooler's class?

I was thinking of parents and siblings. Kid is in a class of 12. I can’t imagine serving pizza and making the parents watch.

One cheese pizza double sliced for the kids. Order a pepperoni and a cheese that the adults can eat. Or bring a fruit and veggie tray for the adults. Cheese and crackers if you feel like you need something else. Water works fine for the adults or buy some cans of soft drinks. 1/4 sheet cake and you are good.

You can put on the invite “Due to space limitations we are afraid that we cannot invite siblings.” If you don’t want a ton of presents you can say “No presents.” I have seen people do food drives instead of gifts. Works great.

[Anonymous]

I have the same problem. What if party at the park or house is not an option? DD’s bday is in late Dec and outdoors is just out.

[Anonymous]

We recently had a party for our daughter's 5th bday. We let her pick the guest list, and she only wanted to invite a handful of friends.

[Anonymous]

Kindergarten is different, there is no pressure to invite the whole class.

OP a small party is fine but at our preschool that would mean no kids from DS class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're worried about paying for a lot of kids, there are cheaper options.

If the weather is nice, just have it at a playground. You can get inexpensive cakes at Giant. Get some pizza, juice boxes, and party supplies at Party City. Done.

Things get a little tougher during the winter, but you can still find less expensive places to book, like nature centers.

I just think people should make an effort to be inclusive, especially when kids are younger.

+1000. They are cute innocent little kids - let’s not disappoint them. If you can’t afford to invite them all then do a classroom celebration and if desired a party outside school with just family/family friends/neighbors.

[Anonymous]

This is the only year I’m doing a whole class party because my child started PK4, had a birthday last week, and barely knows his classmates’ names yet, let alone enough to articulate who he would want at his party, so invitations would be completely arbitrary. With my oldest, who had a birthday later in the school year, by that point had friendships and was able to say “I want John, Jill, Jake, and Jen.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have the same problem. What if party at the park or house is not an option? DD’s bday is in late Dec and outdoors is just out.

I would suggest getting a rec centre. Get the big coffee jar thingy from Dunkin, cake, cookies, juice boxes and party size bag of pretzel/ pop corn/ chips.