A failure to plan on your end does not constitute an emergency on mine. A PSA

[Anonymous]

You’re too much of a puss to open your mouth and say no to the parent, so you come here to whine?

PSA: Grow up, grow a spine, Just Say No.

[Anonymous]

NP here and I want to hear from user parents on their reasoning.. which seem to be plenty on DCUM going by the responses

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you can't do it say "no". It's not complicated.

Already taken care of, thanks. It’s just that you see it talked about here all the time. Clearly, parents need to get it together.

Not really. Some parents are not as bothered as you by 2 lines and a few miles.

It bothers you. Own your own issues. It's not "justified" because there are so many precious Beckys on DCUM that agree with you.

#princessandthepea

It doesn’t change the fact that your lack of planning isn’t my issue to solve. Wtf!

or most people don't care, you do ... so own it. It's not a big deal, she did not do something truly egregious like asking to trade play dates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP here and I want to hear from user parents on their reasoning.. which seem to be plenty on DCUM going by the responses

I usually just don't care if I am driving a kid or two without being paid back. I don't count how often kids are at my house vs their house. I don't freak out over 10 minutes out of my way.

It's just not in my realm of thinking to bean count or be bothered by nothingness.

OTOH, I drove a kid one summer 3 years ago (I don't even remember it) for 2 weeks and the mom got a box for Adele and invited me and told me to bring 2 friends. She was like sorry it took me so long to pay you back... I was like... I was already driving there, not sure I needed to be "Paid back".. but we got to see Adele for free and valet parking... that was nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you can't do it say "no". It's not complicated.

Already taken care of, thanks. It’s just that you see it talked about here all the time. Clearly, parents need to get it together.

Not really. Some parents are not as bothered as you by 2 lines and a few miles.

It bothers you. Own your own issues. It's not "justified" because there are so many precious Beckys on DCUM that agree with you.

#princessandthepea

It doesn’t change the fact that your lack of planning isn’t my issue to solve. Wtf!

or most people don't care, you do ... so own it. It's not a big deal, she did not do something truly egregious like asking to trade play dates.

NP here and I disagree. Most people DO care, they may just be too polite to voice up to users like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, but don't throw "it takes a village" in with this rant. It's about a user using you - not the idea that we all look out for each other and help.

In my neighborhood, we have a disabled boy who is a teenager, but cannot care for himself. When he gets out of his yard and wanders around the neighborhood, we all (ALL OF US) when we see him either run out and guide him back to his house or call his mom and tell her Sam is walking on Main street.
My kids and their friends were caught (not by me, but by neighbors) throwing rocks at a house that was being torn down for a rebuild. The neighbors told them to stop and stood there and watched them ride their bikes away - then sent me (and I assume the other kids' parents) a text explaining what happened.

THAT's what "it takes a village" means. It doesn't mean asking neighbors to drive your kids places, babysitting in an emergency, or any other FAVOR. those are favors - not the concept of "it takes a village" which is more of a "if you see something, say something"

Uh ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son and a boy from his soccer league are attending the same soccer camp for the next couple of weeks. I regretfully agreed to drive him once a week, because they are friends and because the motto ‘it takes a village’ is constantly shoved down our throats until we choke on it. This arrangement involves me driving a couple miles out of my way, then waiting in two lines to sign in the kids, because they are now in two different age groups. Now every day it seems something comes up and the mom needs help. Today was yet another emergency. News flash: Not my problem.

Quit being a user. If someone graciously agrees to help you, don’t abuse it. And for the love of god, stop being cheap or lazy and nail down reliable care for your children. It does not ‘take a village’. It takes you doing your job as a parent.

+1

"My schedule has changed and we will no longer be able to carpool."

[Anonymous]

Whomever said "it takes a village" is the type who is perfectly willing to apply that to ANYONE who comes along, for their OWN convenience. You don't have to live by someone else's motto, OP.

[Anonymous]

Some villagers don't seem willing to give, only take. Or, ask this lady if she can do some babysitting so you and your DH can have a nice date night!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, but don't throw "it takes a village" in with this rant. It's about a user using you - not the idea that we all look out for each other and help.

+1 OP, you're not choking on "it takes a village." You're choking on a neighbor relationship in which you give, but don't get.

[Anonymous]

I hear you, OP. I would feel resentful too, because it's really hard to say no. Everyone knows that, and the people giving you a hard time wouldn't be comfortable in your shoes either!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you can't do it say "no". It's not complicated.

Already taken care of, thanks. It’s just that you see it talked about here all the time. Clearly, parents need to get it together.

Good! So you said no?

[Anonymous]

Glad you are not part of my village OP, where we moms help each other out. We don't tally who did what this week, because we know we've all got each others' backs. If I drove more during camp, other mons in my village drive more during the school year and vice versa. Friends help each other out, without whining, complaining, etc.

Go crawl back into your dark hole, and stay there by yourself. And oh, BTW, hope you are never in a jam of having made summer camp plans back in January and then started a new job and couldn't drive, or have an aging parent with an emergency, or heaven forbid you or your spouse have a health emergency and you need to count on friends to help you out...

[Anonymous]

PSA OP. Your inability to say no is your problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Glad you are not part of my village OP, where we moms help each other out. We don't tally who did what this week, because we know we've all got each others' backs. If I drove more during camp, other mons in my village drive more during the school year and vice versa. Friends help each other out, without whining, complaining, etc.

Go crawl back into your dark hole, and stay there by yourself. And oh, BTW, hope you are never in a jam of having made summer camp plans back in January and then started a new job and couldn't drive, or have an aging parent with an emergency, or heaven forbid you or your spouse have a health emergency and you need to count on friends to help you out...

“All have each others’ backs” is quite different than being used by a non-giver. I’ve been in both situations and it sucks when a village situation turns into a gimme situation.