I haven't bonded with my new puppy-- still miss my old dog
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Anonymous
OP, ignore that. There are some people who hop around the forum looking for opportunity to hurt and inflict emotional pain. Those who lost a pet, they know what you are going through and those who did not, never will so don't bother to reply and don't let them get to you. There are also people who send you a big hug and know what you are going through. Loosing a dog is like a loosing a person because they are in our lives all the time, every day, we do talk to them, they communicate back. We spend more time with dogs then with most humans because humans have chores and all and dog is always there for us. They give us all the love, all their lives and all they want back is to feel love. If you are not sure thinking you took the dog too early, just close your eyes and think how empty the house would be if the new dog would not be there. It takes time to created the bond. It is natural that you don't love the new dog yet, because you are good person and you are looking for real deep relationship that takes time. This will be just the same if you wait a year or five. It is in part because the new dog is not the old dog, not hat comfortable familiar everything about him. He does not know you like the other dog did, and you don' t know him because he is new. That is why do not despair, take it slowly, take it day at the time and give the dude chance to win your heart. Think also about the old dog, how happy he would be seeing you being happier and this new dog can give this little happiness and bring back the joy of having a pal and a friend at your side. Maybe the other dog helped you ended up with this dog and maybe there is something of him in the new dog, at first you are looking for those things and there is not many but there are some, look closely. Then with time you will realize that this dog is worth loving for himself for his own treats. It is so hard and you will miss your old dog but every time you do, take a new dog and talk to him, tell him how much you miss the other dog, give him a hug and tell how happy you are that at least you have him to talk to and share the sadness with, look into his eyes, his big beautiful lovely alive eyes and you will see your old dog in them. All dogs are related, they come from the same tree, they share the same genes and the same soul. In some ways you have your old dog in the new dog for sure. Your grief is serious and painful. You will never forget your dog. The pain will be there for a long time, just like with loosing a person, you will be better with carrying a weight as you would carry a load, but the load is not going to get smaller. With time it will be easier because you will learn to feel less pain and sadness when you think of the happy moments you spend with the dog. This is part of the problem and pain, you not only grief a dog, you also grief those moments and times that he was with you through and helped you through and just made you happy, and now with him it feels little like that link to those times are broken and the past is gone. That hurts and it is hard. The only consolation is that the new dog will be with you for another 15 years and keep you company and be at your side to take you into future. You are starting new chapter and new chapters are never easy. Bless you and your little angels, the old one and the new one. |
Anonymous
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together.... Author unknown... |
Anonymous
-1. Kids, yes. Spouse, possibly. I don't get along with my narcissistic mother, so let me tell you, the loss of my soul dog - a large breed, one of the very intelligent ones, sensitive, tuned into my feelings, very bonded to me - has been absolutely devastating, and I probably would trade 15 years of my mom's life for 15 more years with my amazing dog. I loved her like a child and losing her broke my heart. YMMV. |
Anonymous
| Eventually you’ll bond. I got a new puppy after my dog died this year and I keep comparing him to her which isn’t right. Some of these things are dumb like Mia would twirl on her own for food but Nemo doesn’t making feeding time a little less entertaining. Or Mia used to “hug” my feet whenever I was at the stove to manipulate me to get a scrap of whatever I was trying to cook (worked every time) but Nemo doesn’t. Silly things like that. I got a white male rather than a black female of the same breed to try and avoid the comparison but it’s hard not to. My new dog is great but he’s just not the same. Sooner or later I’ll get over that. |
Anonymous
| I think this is really common when you are a mom of little kids. We lost the beloved pup we got before we were married a few years ago and got a new pup a little too soon. It was hard to bond at first, one because we missed our old dog and two, because a puppy is soooo much work compared to an elderly trained dog. It gets much much easier! |
Anonymous
| I’m sorry OP. I lost my beloved dog over two years ago and I still cry thinking about him. He’d let me pick him up like a baby and gaze lovingly into my eyes. I miss him every day. I understand your pain. |
Anonymous
| It’s been 5 years since OP posted. I’d guess they’ve bonded by now! |