My teen is missing and don't want to come home

[Anonymous]

Be very nice, no guilt. Your priority is to locate her in case she's held against her will.

Call police and hire a private investigator to see how you can locate her with the record of that phone call, or next time she calls.

[Anonymous]

Are you the OP of the other thread about a teen who ran away from a shelter and the OP couldn't explain why her DD preferred to be at a shelter rather than at home with her?

[Anonymous]

OP, could your teen arrange to stay with a high school friend and their parents? Or a relative. Better to have her with a trusted friend realtive or at a shelter than living with strangers.

If your DD doesn't want to be in your house, she must have a reason. Find out what that reason is and work with her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate to say this OP but she fits the profile of someone being wed trafficked. A lot of teenage girls in this situation are normal middle class girls groomed by older “boyfriends” who talk the girls into doing something sexual and then use blackmail, force or withholding of love to get the girl to do subsequent and escalating acts.

I worried about trafficking too, after this post from op. I remember op posting back before Christmas and hadn’t thought of that, but this post makes me think of it. Op, I would try to keep contact and locate her.

[Anonymous]

Ask her yes or no questions she would be safe to answer when she calls back. Are you being held against your will? Are you still in the area? Anything that will give you more information. Be nice and don’t beg. In the event she’s ok, guilt may kick in and she’ll realize how worried you are. Follow advice above about meeting in a neutral area.

[Anonymous]

Is she using her usual cell phone? Do you have the phone number she called you from?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a man who lives in your house OP? My first thought is that she's been abused.

Agree. Your boyfriend, her step dad, uncle, grandfather?

Also my thought. Maybe not necessarily abuse, but a daughter who feels like she's expressed concerned over a man at home, and felt like mom chose the guy over her?

[Anonymous]

OP has obviously chosen a man over her daughter.

Answer the question OP.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you have a boyfriend or a second (or third) husband in the house?
If so, I think you need to think really hard about your loyalties.

[Anonymous]

OP - is her phone on your plan? if so, look at your phone bill to see other numbers she may have called or texted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there a man who lives in your house OP? My first thought is that she's been abused.

Agree. Your boyfriend, her step dad, uncle, grandfather?

Or maybe the males who are most likely to live with a teenage girl (her father or brother). Sexual abuse happens in traditional families, too, you know...

[Anonymous]

It could be something is wrong at home.

It is also possible for an adventurous kid with a wild streak that living on your own with a bunch of others is really fun at 16. It is easy to get caught up in the lifestyle

Is she still going to school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD 16 is missing, with police looking for her. She has been gone a month, with no contact. Out of the blue, she called me last night. She sounds fine and I can hear people in the background. She does not want to come home. At.All. She want's to live, work and get a place on her own. WTF? I pleaded with her to come home, but she says that is not her home. She hates the house. What the heck should I do? Stop pleading and say ok?

Do you have friends or family she could (or would) stay with? I think you stick with the goal of trying to make sure she's safe. Make sure she knows she's welcome at home, but if she doesn't want to be home, you want her to be somewhere safe. Will she tell you what she needs, or is she determined that she can do it on her own?

As long as she's safe, everything else is fixable. Maybe not now, but eventually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP has obviously chosen a man over her daughter.

Answer the question OP.

This. Op has refused to answer this question, although it’s been asked several times.

Op, it’s clear to us and your DD that you are choosing a man over her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP has obviously chosen a man over her daughter.

Answer the question OP.

This. Op has refused to answer this question, although it’s been asked several times.

Op, it’s clear to us and your DD that you are choosing a man over her.

+1000. Signed a daughter whose mom picked several men over her kids.

Op if you loved your daughter, you wouldn’t have gone home until you found her. Now, you may or may not have another chance to get the man out of the house.

My husband is literally dying of cancer and if he did, there is no way in hell I would ever choose a man over my kids. It’s called being a parent, ya know where you put their needs before your own.

Good luck.