Tired of investing/planning - surrounded by flashy money

[Anonymous]

This town is so vain - no wonder they call it the swamp!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a net worth of 3 million. I drive a 6 year old minivan, wear a purse bought at DSW, and still sport the tiny diamond ring my husband proposed with back when we were students. We do have a nice house, take nice vacations, and send our kids to private school. These are things that are priorities for us. I really could care less what others think.

Only insecure people feel the need to flash their money.

It's "couldn't" care less. If you could care less, than you do care.

[Anonymous]

I think you care an alarming amount about what people think of you. DO YOU BOO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my 30s, I felt like you - like why am I doing this. Honestly I liked/still like nice things sometimes denying yourself gets old - even more so when you’re surrounded by people bragging about things. My views shifted a bit in my 40s and a lot in my 50s and I am thankful for the investments my 37 year old self made. Reason being — I know people who were always jetting around, multiple homes etc. Many of them are age 70+ and still working a ton and tell me they’re tired of it (different to work if you want to). The option of downshifting later becomes priceless - and if you don’t ever want to downshift, well it’s not like you can’t get a fancy home or car in your 40s or 50s - giving yourself options is a good thing.

Trying to stay in our starter home longer. Your post encourages me. Our goal is to invest 250k into our private brokerage and then move. I’m late 30s. I do hope it will pay off because I’m jealous of the nicer homes, vacations etc of my friends.

[Anonymous]

It will pay off. I’m in my 50’s. Saving $ early will give you peace of mind in your 50’s+ for things that are difficult to truly grasp in your 30’s or even 40’s. It’s very difficult to imagine a limited amount of time on this earth to live and make money until you are nearer to a shorter time span. I’m grateful I always saved.

Time spend with your loved ones as cliche as it sounds is what really matters - whether vacations with your kids or game nights and parks - don’t pass up these opportunities either.

[Anonymous]

You will be thrilled when you are not late 40s or early 50s and shitting your pants about how you will pay your big mortgage on the big impressive house once you get reorg'd out of your job or you decide you just can't take the daily grind anymore and want to consult. Seriously. Peace of mind is worth it.

[Anonymous]

We live in a flashy culture, in flashy places.

It's not easy to be different.

[Anonymous]

Do you have kids OP? The point when kids start applying and attending college is often when the "spenders" start to quiet down. It is heartbreaking to tell your kid that despite their hard work and high grades earned that you just can not afford the school they proudly gained admission to and so desperately want to attend. To give your child an education without their having to be anchored to repaying loans over the next 15-20 years (or longer) is a true gift. A git that will literally last a lifetime. From what I am noticing now with peers, that is when you see who has money, who saved and who did not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids OP? The point when kids start applying and attending college is often when the "spenders" start to quiet down. It is heartbreaking to tell your kid that despite their hard work and high grades earned that you just can not afford the school they proudly gained admission to and so desperately want to attend. To give your child an education without their having to be anchored to repaying loans over the next 15-20 years (or longer) is a true gift. A git that will literally last a lifetime. From what I am noticing now with peers, that is when you see who has money, who saved and who did not.

Well put pp. I had a friend many years ago whose older daughter was accepted in to Harvard and they could not afford it. It was very stressful for them to cobble together the financing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ever feel like everyone around you has the trappings - huge new house (not in DC), 100k car etc - so they obviously externally appear successful, while you could afford same/much of the same stuff and don’t buy it so everyone assumes you don’t do well? I know it’s lame and 99% of the time I don’t care - yet I’m from a flashy culture and family where everyone talks about these things so at times it does get to me. As for why I haven’t bought these things - had a goal of $1mil in NW by myself by my mid 30s so in order to get there, I got used to not even looking at such things. It became about investment accounts etc but obviously I can’t show that off or even discuss it the way you can discuss your Maserati. Now that that goal has come and gone, it’s about setting up to retire early and/or leave my high stress profession for a small business when I get to the point where I feel
Like I’ve “made my money.” Again not something I can discuss bc I don’t want people going on about - but why would you retire early? And yet sometimes I’m tired of everyone acting like DH and I couldn’t possibly be in their echelon. Anyone else?

Nope, dont care. I'm laughing all the way to the bank.

[Anonymous]

Too funny, just last night DH and I was talking about how great it will be in 10 years when we are early 50s, kids out of the house and we could literally work jobs paying 50k/yr and live well. He wants to be a high school math teacher (hes already a High school varsity coach) and coach, and I want to walk dogs/dog sit. We can do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have a net worth of 3 million. I drive a 6 year old minivan, wear a purse bought at DSW, and still sport the tiny diamond ring my husband proposed with back when we were students. We do have a nice house, take nice vacations, and send our kids to private school. These are things that are priorities for us. I really could care less what others think.

Only insecure people feel the need to flash their money.

It's "couldn't" care less. If you could care less, than you do care.

Technically I could care less, but I don’t even care enough to put the effort into caring any less than I already do.

[Anonymous]

We spent many years saving, investing and planning so we could put our kids through college with no debt, build up retirement savings, pay off our mortgage etc. We lived comfortably but not the way we could have. But now we are retired and even after setting aside a lot of money for our kids (once we are gone) and grandkids via 529's and a charitable trust we still have more money then we could spend unless we got "flashy" which just isn't in our DNA. We live well and travel well but neither of us has a desire to make some kind of statement. I drive a 5 year old Subaru and my DH drives a used car. He could afford a Ferrari or a Bentley but doesn't need it.

Save, invest and plan and don't worry about flashy money. Many who have it don't have it if there is a recession or a job loss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Too funny, just last night DH and I was talking about how great it will be in 10 years when we are early 50s, kids out of the house and we could literally work jobs paying 50k/yr and live well. He wants to be a high school math teacher (hes already a High school varsity coach) and coach, and I want to walk dogs/dog sit. We can do this.

How much do you make now and what do you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a net worth of 3 million. I drive a 6 year old minivan, wear a purse bought at DSW, and still sport the tiny diamond ring my husband proposed with back when we were students. We do have a nice house, take nice vacations, and send our kids to private school. These are things that are priorities for us. I really could care less what others think.

Only insecure people feel the need to flash their money.

Sending your kids to private school is flashy and snobby. I can’t believe some of the comments private school parents have made to me in the past year. It is the south Florida equivalent of owning a Ferrari. None gets to know you without knowing which private school your kids go to. And of course you wear cheap clothes so we can know about that as well.