Would you push to stay in a hotel when visiting IL's?

[Anonymous]

We're doing a block of rooms in a hotel, but we have an infant that still wakes at night for feedings, plus my brother has bad sleep apnea.

[Anonymous]

We insisted on staying at a hotel when visiting DH's aunt and uncle because I was very pregnant and the only sleeping options were 1) a horrible futon, or 2) an air mattress. They were pissy about it, but whatever.

When it comes to DH's parents, we may have a problem as DD gets older. She's only 2 now and has been fine with us sticking her pack n play in their laundry room. As she gets older, I'm not sure where she'll sleep, since they only have 2 bedrooms. They've talked about putting a foldout couch in their office, but considering that's been a conversation for the last 3 years, I doubt it'll happen anytime soon. I anticipate conflict over it, but if they don't have the space to accommodate us, we don't have a choice!

[Anonymous]

I'm a DH and years ago DW convinced me to stay in a hotel in a similar situation. Boy, was she right. Team hotel, now, and forever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We insisted on staying at a hotel when visiting DH's aunt and uncle because I was very pregnant and the only sleeping options were 1) a horrible futon, or 2) an air mattress. They were pissy about it, but whatever.

When it comes to DH's parents, we may have a problem as DD gets older. She's only 2 now and has been fine with us sticking her pack n play in their laundry room. As she gets older, I'm not sure where she'll sleep, since they only have 2 bedrooms. They've talked about putting a foldout couch in their office, but considering that's been a conversation for the last 3 years, I doubt it'll happen anytime soon. I anticipate conflict over it, but if they don't have the space to accommodate us, we don't have a choice!

Oh wow! We have the same dilemma. DD is in a pack n play in the laundry. Except she's 3. We have no clue what to do when she outgrows it. Inlaws have started talking about sleeping bags

[Anonymous]

Eventually, and nice for you, maybe kids can stay with grandparents and you guys in a hotel. Win-win.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We insisted on staying at a hotel when visiting DH's aunt and uncle because I was very pregnant and the only sleeping options were 1) a horrible futon, or 2) an air mattress. They were pissy about it, but whatever.

When it comes to DH's parents, we may have a problem as DD gets older. She's only 2 now and has been fine with us sticking her pack n play in their laundry room. As she gets older, I'm not sure where she'll sleep, since they only have 2 bedrooms. They've talked about putting a foldout couch in their office, but considering that's been a conversation for the last 3 years, I doubt it'll happen anytime soon. I anticipate conflict over it, but if they don't have the space to accommodate us, we don't have a choice!

My DS is in the stage where he is now crawling and pulling up and getting into everything and I don't want him in my parents' un-babyproofed house when there aren't multiple people watching him. My parents are HUGE collectors of antiques and there is expensive, breakable stuff everywhere. And there are all kinds of hazards around their home (extremely steep stairs, etc.)--they live in a very large but older home--think historic farmhouse.

[Anonymous]

How do you all afford this? Even at the crappy $120 a night hotels, that would blow our Christmas budget. We don't have an extra $500 every time we visit inlaws (every 6 weeks)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Heavily pregnant women get a pass on everything.

Not in my family. This wouldn't have gone over well. Sorry.

Regardless, heavily pregnant women get a pass. If your family cannot accept decisions made for the well-being of a heavily pregnant woman, that's on them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you all afford this? Even at the crappy $120 a night hotels, that would blow our Christmas budget. We don't have an extra $500 every time we visit inlaws (every 6 weeks)

You don't visit every 6 weeks for several nights. But also, if you are happy with the setup there's no reason to change just because other people are not happy. You do you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you all afford this? Even at the crappy $120 a night hotels, that would blow our Christmas budget. We don't have an extra $500 every time we visit inlaws (every 6 weeks)

You don't visit every 6 weeks for several nights. But also, if you are happy with the setup there's no reason to change just because other people are not happy. You do you.

PP here. We're extremely unhappy with the setup but can't afford otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you all afford this? Even at the crappy $120 a night hotels, that would blow our Christmas budget. We don't have an extra $500 every time we visit inlaws (every 6 weeks)

You don't visit every 6 weeks for several nights. But also, if you are happy with the setup there's no reason to change just because other people are not happy. You do you.

PP here. We're extremely unhappy with the setup but can't afford otherwise.

Then don't visit so frequently. If you need to see them every six weeks, alternate visits - they can visit you.

These are all choices, with associated consequences. Why are you making choices that don't work for you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Heavily pregnant women get a pass on everything.

Not in my family. This wouldn't have gone over well. Sorry.

Too bad for you then. Others know how to stand up for what they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you all afford this? Even at the crappy $120 a night hotels, that would blow our Christmas budget. We don't have an extra $500 every time we visit inlaws (every 6 weeks)

You don't visit every 6 weeks for several nights. But also, if you are happy with the setup there's no reason to change just because other people are not happy. You do you.

PP here. We're extremely unhappy with the setup but can't afford otherwise.

Why on earth are you going so often, then?
My family lives in Europe and we see them once a year on average, and once every 5 years for more distant relatives in Asia.
Visits get less frequent as distance and costs increase, simple equation.

[Anonymous]

DH is from the Dallas-Fort Worth area and we visit once a year. His parents are divorced so we have to spend time with his dad and stepmom, and his mom and stepdad. Before the kids came along we slept over at their houses, but once the kids were here we started staying in hotels. It's so much nicer to stay in a hotel that's near the airport and approximately equidistant to MIL's and FIL's houses. We unpack once, set up the bathroom how we like it, and enjoy the free breakfast each day before heading over to whichever in-law's house for the day. We return to the hotel in the evening for a good night's sleep. No worries about FIL's big, barky German Shepherd that slobbers and sheds everywhere, the horribly uncomfortable mattress in his tiny guest room, the lack of any decent food at MIL's. We get to enjoy visiting with the family without all the hassles and discomfort. During Christmas visits the kids do sleep over at MIL's on Christmas Eve, and that's fun for them. When we first suggested staying in a hotel years ago, the IL's were a little surprised but they went along with it. We've been doing it this way for so long now that no one bats an eye.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you all afford this? Even at the crappy $120 a night hotels, that would blow our Christmas budget. We don't have an extra $500 every time we visit inlaws (every 6 weeks)

You don't visit every 6 weeks for several nights. But also, if you are happy with the setup there's no reason to change just because other people are not happy. You do you.

PP here. We're extremely unhappy with the setup but can't afford otherwise.

Why on earth are you going so often, then?
My family lives in Europe and we see them once a year on average, and once every 5 years for more distant relatives in Asia.
Visits get less frequent as distance and costs increase, simple equation.

So people who don't see their inlaws often are the ones staying in hotels? We normally have a reason why we visit every 6 weeks. Even Thanksgiving and Christmas are 6 weeks apart.