Dating a divorced person still living with spouse

[Anonymous]

No. For heavens sake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just put a sock on the doorknob when you stay over.

OK, so this went over my head. Explain?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No no no no. Run. I doubt he is actually divorced, for one. No one does that. HUGE red flags.

While your advice to run may be accurate - your statement that no one does this is wrong. I know 2 couples who are currently in this situation. They do this because it's best for their respective kids. Whether that's true or not, I can't say, but it happens.

OP - FWIW - it depends on what you want out of life and your relationship and if divorced guy is telling the truth and frankly, whether you want to deal with it. If it works in your own life than do what you want but if you want the standard traditional "dating to get serious to marry etc" then no, he is not the one for you.

There’s a whole sitcom based on the idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just put a sock on the doorknob when you stay over.

OK, so this went over my head. Explain?

When you have a room mate in college... if there is a sock on the doorknob it means they have somebody in the bedroom and to sleep on the couch.

[Anonymous]

I would wonder what's wrong with myself to even entertain this notion OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would wonder what's wrong with myself to even entertain this notion OP!

I just found out today. This situation is a big NOPE. I thought it would be an interesting topic for DCUM though. Especially since we have a poster on another thread putting forward this idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would wonder what's wrong with myself to even entertain this notion OP!

I just found out today. This situation is a big NOPE. I thought it would be an interesting topic for DCUM though. Especially since we have a poster on another thread putting forward this idea.

I want to see how he has addressed it in the past.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would wonder what's wrong with myself to even entertain this notion OP!

I just found out today. This situation is a big NOPE. I thought it would be an interesting topic for DCUM though. Especially since we have a poster on another thread putting forward this idea.

Wait, you JUST found out? How long have you guys been dating?

Him: "Um, btw, I still live with my ex-wife".

[Anonymous]

This type of living situation is not as rare as you think. I know three couples who have this type of living arrangement. There is nothing romantic going on between them ( the main reason for the divorce) but they stay together in the same house for the children and for financial reasons. Obviously they do not hate each other. As for dating, I am not sure how it works.

[Anonymous]

I can just imagine the OP pulling up to the house for an evening of passion, and then his ex and the kids pull into the driveway next to her.

Awwwwwwkward...

[Anonymous]

No, and I would want to know why the marriage failed - who cheated and what is the long term plan?

[Anonymous]

Anyone married should be off limits period. If they are going through the divorce or separated you simply say, "Ok great, give me a call when you're single and divorced".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This type of living situation is not as rare as you think. I know three couples who have this type of living arrangement. There is nothing romantic going on between them ( the main reason for the divorce) but they stay together in the same house for the children and for financial reasons. Obviously they do not hate each other. As for dating, I am not sure how it works.

You probably know this situation then. Asexual wives, special needs kids, wealth disparities, etc. These situations sound like a real zoo.

I bet in all three scenarios, only one spouse is having sex. There's no dating in this scenario, fwb.

It would nice if people in these alternative would be upfront about their situations. He wasn't and I suspect the ones you know aren't either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone married should be off limits period. If they are going through the divorce or separated you simply say, "Ok great, give me a call when you're single and divorced".

That’s pretty harsh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anyone married should be off limits period. If they are going through the divorce or separated you simply say, "Ok great, give me a call when you're single and divorced".

That’s pretty harsh.

Why? I’ve not met one person who is separated/going through divorce who doesn’t have a ton of emotional baggage and/or ex drama. I’m sure there’s the rare 100% amicable divorce with no issues, but I don’t think it’s common.