How much does past cheating matter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not want to see Steve if I were Diana. I don't understand why it would be a mystery to people why Diana wouldn't want to see Steve.

It’s a wedding. It’s understood that it’s going to be a parade of memory lane - good and bad. She’s not acting normally - if she was over Steve she’d tell her new husband that an ex fling was going to be there and go with her new hubs and enjoy herself because who cares. But she’s making up excuses to either go solo or not at all which is RED FLAG city. Who doesn't bring a spouse to a destination wedding!?

[Anonymous]

TLDR.

[Anonymous]

Chances are she has lied to Dave about past events, and knows trust issues will arise if found out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She still has a thing for Steve.

Bingo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not want to see Steve if I were Diana. I don't understand why it would be a mystery to people why Diana wouldn't want to see Steve.

OP here, and this actually hadn't occurred to me - I/we all assumed it had to mean she hadn't told Dave the truth, and was afraid of getting caught out. Likewise, it hadn't occurred to me that (as several of you have suggested) she might still have a thing for Steve/be afraid something might happen again if they were in the same place for a week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Chances are she has lied to Dave about past events, and knows trust issues will arise if found out.

OP here. This was my/our friend group's assumption. I do wonder though, why Diane has stayed close enough friends with Stacy to be invited to the wedding if that's the case.

It's not like she just met Dave last week- they've been married for a couple of years and dated for a couple before that. She knows what she has and hasn't told Dave. Even if it wasn't a destination wedding, it could have been a birthday party or some other event with this same family where she could get caught in a lie. Hell, Stacy attended Diane's wedding to Dave. Why didn't she just distance herself from Stacy and her family if she doesn't want Dave to know the truth (again, assuming he doesn't)?

[Anonymous]

Why the hell doesn't she just RSVP no and be done with it???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why the hell doesn't she just RSVP no and be done with it???

This. She’s still immature. “So sorry, this trip isn’t in our budget right now”. Done.

[Anonymous]

Any chance there was some overlap, where she was still sleeping with Steve, while starting to date Dave?

[Anonymous]

None of this is any of your business. You are oddly invested in this. I think you have it out for Diane. Let me guess she was or is involved with a guy you liked who picked her instead of you? She’s everyone’s darling and you can’t wait for her downfall.

[Anonymous]

You guys are all trailer trash. How does your ilk afford a destination wedding??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: None of this is any of your business. You are oddly invested in this. I think you have it out for Diane. Let me guess she was or is involved with a guy you liked who picked her instead of you? She’s everyone’s darling and you can’t wait for her downfall.

+1

[Anonymous]

I'm sure Dave knows about Steve. And if he doesn't, he won't divorce her her over it as you suggested OP. That would be a CRAZY reason to divorce. You don't know what happened in her first marriage. Dave probably does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: None of this is any of your business. You are oddly invested in this. I think you have it out for Diane. Let me guess she was or is involved with a guy you liked who picked her instead of you? She’s everyone’s darling and you can’t wait for her downfall.

No, and no. Diane is a good friend and every time we've gotten together lately she brings this up, and is very agitated, to the point of getting tearful. At one point she asked me if I'd go to the wedding with her instead of her husband. I don't want to do that, but it has become such a "thing" with how much she talks about it and how upset she gets, that our friend group has started to discuss it, and, as I mentioned in my first post, has very divided opinions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any chance there was some overlap, where she was still sleeping with Steve, while starting to date Dave?

OP here. I don't think so, she dated a couple of other people in between. I guess it's possible she was still sleeping with Steve after she told us she'd stopped.