Husband falls off radar when he goes to visit family

Anonymous
Let your husband be a parent. I’d be annoyed getting a call and having to talk on the phone every single day, too.
Anonymous
Calling your child once a day is normal, not overkill.
Anonymous
I agree to let your husband call when it’s best for him. What you do would be fine if he was up for it, but he’s not. He’ll let you know if your child is not ok, so there’s no need to call and check on him. Sorry you two arent on the same wavelength here, but it’s easy for you to rectify by backing off.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Calling your child once a day is normal, not overkill.

OP didn’t say she was calling to talk with ds. She said she wanted to know how ds was doing and was frustrated by her husband’s abruptness on the phone. Basically she wants a report when she wants a report.
Anonymous
We just had this. With one grandfather and the other grandmother in poor health (just age related), we wanted the kids to see both grandparents this summer. We don't really have the leave for us to take 2 week long vacations this summer, so I took the kids to see my parents and then 2 weeks later, my wife took the kids to see her mother and family. We each got our own "vacation" while the other was out of town with the kids. While they were away, I went to the movies twice. Prior, I had only seen one movie in the theater in the last 4 years. I went to eat at restaurants that my wife doesn't like and was able to get some work done cleaning the basement without getting interrupted every 5 minutes or having kids routing around the basement and "finding" things that I had planned to trash and insisting we couldn't get by without.

We talked every 2-3 days during each visit. We did updates via text periodically for our "chats". This way, we both could communicate when convenient.
Anonymous
When I travel I like to be immersed in the new experience. It's a vacation from my usual life. I like my usual life but it's a break, and to benefit the most, the less contact the better. I resent being drawn back into my usual life on a solo-by-choice vacation unless it's necessary.

Op, this does not address your need to talk with your son, however.
Anonymous
Men say they are "stressed", or a situation "stresses them" when they don't want to do something.

They just don't want to do it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Men say they are "stressed", or a situation "stresses them" when they don't want to do something.

They just don't want to do it.


Super helpful. So when people say all wives are this or that surely it’s true.
Anonymous
My husband calls me constantly and it drives me nuts. Oh for he says when long distance was expensive and phones were attached to your house.
Anonymous
Dear OP:

Can you teach my DH how to do this for four weeks too?

Sincerely,
DW who wants four weeks of freedom
Anonymous
Your husband knows you don't like his family. He does or he wouldn't be spending so much time with them.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
You might as well have titled this thread "The Whole World Ought to Revolve Around Me."

OP, he's dealing with a stressful family dynamic, and is kind enough to do it without involving you. Instead of appreciating that, you're putting additional demands on him and making the experience even worse. You are being exactly the opposite of a loving, kind, supportive spouse. If it's that important to you to have daily check-ins, perhaps you could ask him the easiest way to make that happen (e.g., could you check in by text after he goes to bed).


Marriage sounds awesome. Where do I sign up?
Anonymous
Calling him every day is too much. I'd be annoyed, too.
Anonymous
OP here. The consensus seems to be that it is unreasonable to ask him to call once a day, so I'll ask him to text me about how DS is doing instead. That's fine. I just find it annoying 2 or more times a day when I am at work to discuss absolutely nothing. But when he is with his parents, he doesn't call at all or take my calls - granted his dad is annoying and talks endlessly, so perhaps he just needs a break.
Anonymous
He needs me time.
He needs alone time.
I think you like to control him.
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