Gift for acquaintance whose husband just left her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was thinking an orchid and card? What should I write? I’m heartbroken for her and her kids! Her husband cheated for years and finally left for someone younger and thinner, more successful etc etc.

Wow, that's brutal.

Seriously!! OP, are you this “younger, thinner, more successful” other woman? Who says that?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was thinking an orchid and card? What should I write? I’m heartbroken for her and her kids! Her husband cheated for years and finally left for someone younger and thinner, more successful etc etc.

Wow, that's brutal.

Seriously!! OP, are you this “younger, thinner, more successful” other woman? Who says that?!

People who recognize their friends who got married in the first place using the same tactics. Easy to get replaced down the road.

[Anonymous]

Buy her a bottle of great wine, then come over with at least one of other of her friends and share it together.

[Anonymous]

You kinda come across like you are rubbing it in, by pointing out the perceived upgrades of the new woman.

She passed you on the social ladder. does her husband leaving her make you feel slightly happy? Be honest op.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You kinda come across like you are rubbing it in, by pointing out the perceived upgrades of the new woman.

She passed you on the social ladder. does her husband leaving her make you feel slightly happy? Be honest op.

Interesting psychoanalysis! But nope I’m definitely not even slightly happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Buy her a bottle of great wine, then come over with at least one of other of her friends and share it together.

I have suspected she might have a drinking problem- does that make a bottle of wine a better or worse gift? Plus she probably doesn’t want an under $20 bottle I can afford. Just want to let her know she’s a superstar and badass and I believe in her and my family loves her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Was thinking an orchid and card? What should I write? I’m heartbroken for her and her kids! Her husband cheated for years and finally left for someone younger and thinner, more successful etc etc.

Wow, that's brutal.

Seriously!! OP, are you this “younger, thinner, more successful” other woman? Who says that?!

Ha no would never in a million years object myself to the hell of breaking up anyone’s family least of all my own. I’m crazy about my DH!

[Anonymous]

"Hey, what to join me for a manicure/pedicure? My treat!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Buy her a bottle of great wine, then come over with at least one of other of her friends and share it together.

I have suspected she might have a drinking problem- does that make a bottle of wine a better or worse gift? Plus she probably doesn’t want an under $20 bottle I can afford. Just want to let her know she’s a superstar and badass and I believe in her and my family loves her.

Then just write that on a card and forget a gift—or send hand cream or something that doesn’t require maintenance.

[Anonymous]

An orchid is a TERRIBLE idea. As a PP mentioned, they're hard to keep alive, and I very much doubt she wants something else to deal with right now. And if she does happen to have a green thumb, do you think she wants the stupid flower that she got reminding her of what happened every time she walks in her kitchen? Nope. No orchid.

[Anonymous]

I would have thought it was really weird if someone gave me a gift when I separated or divorced.

I had moved into my own apartment and didn’t have a lot of money to spare, so taking me out to dinner or for drinks would’ve been nice. Anything material is strange.

[Anonymous]

I think paying for a years membership on a high-quality online dating website would be ideal.

Or perhaps pay for a membership for a matchmaking service in your area.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Sent a heartfelt card and it was very sincerely appreciated. Would definitely recommend to anyone reading. She was really thankful for the support!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think paying for a years membership on a high-quality online dating website would be ideal.

Or perhaps pay for a membership for a matchmaking service in your area.

It's been less than a week...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am going through this. I would appreciate a friend, or even an acquaintance, taking the time to call me up and say, "sorry, I heard about ..., I would like to invite you out to drinks/lunch/dinner." The spouse left behind is likely feeling some combination of abandoned, depressed, invisible unloved, overehelmed, unsupported, and so, so sad. Knowing that even one person out there is thinking of you, and offering their support, is a gift beyond measure. Then be prepared to listen, and bring lots of kleenex.

+1000 —- I am going through this too with husband leaving me while we have a baby together —- I would appreciate a friend taking me to lunch or someone ordering a massage to my home/etc — or bringing a meal — it is a grieving process