I feel like marriage is on the verge of imploding

[Anonymous]

I hate when they try to hide the sex of the spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whyyyy are you stalking your spouse? Get a life.

Seeing a text when I turned my head while bucking our kid into a car seat doesn't equal stalking.

No, but wondering about every single thing they discuss with their co-workers, which has nothing to do with you, is.

[Anonymous]

Write down three things you want to improve about yourself and focus on those. Not your husband. Be pleasant amd friendly with him but independent.
This is very dire. Talking to him about it will do nothing at this point. What does he actually say about you? Make sure you really listen listen listen. If he says ILY that’s a start.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whyyyy are you stalking your spouse? Get a life.

Seeing a text when I turned my head while bucking our kid into a car seat doesn't equal stalking.

Sooo what was the text? Could help give advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How anyone can live like this is beyond me. What are you getting out of it? Other than obvious financial support (which is nice).

I knew a couple like this (divorced now). They were living completely separate lives within their house. They emailed each other while they were both in the house to communicate. Email! Internally the husband was going through all kinds of turmoil (they're both a little off) and one day he picked up and took his stuff and most of the money and left the house and blind-sided her.

Communication is important!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate when they try to hide the sex of the spouse.

I hate it too but seem to see it more on DCUM lately. I'm sure posters do it out of concern that if they are ID'd as a woman posting about a man or a man posting about a woman, they'll get a pile of the unfotunately common garbage that comes up on DCUM: "You must be a horrible wife who nags and withholds sex from your husband" or "You must be a horrible husband who hides things from your wife and doesn't do your share with the kids, house, etc."

So many posts like those, ALL the time here. Or posts determined that every OP must be the problem in any situation. The other classic: "Huh. Wonder what your spouse's side of the story is!" -- usually said with no further attempt to offer insights or actual advice.

This knee-jerk meanness and baiting is probably what prompts some OPs to try to hide genders. Agreed, it's annoying, but not as annoying as the inevitable responses saying, "If you posted here, you must be the one at fault/trolling/whining/nagging."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate when they try to hide the sex of the spouse.

I hate it too but seem to see it more on DCUM lately. I'm sure posters do it out of concern that if they are ID'd as a woman posting about a man or a man posting about a woman, they'll get a pile of the unfotunately common garbage that comes up on DCUM: "You must be a horrible wife who nags and withholds sex from your husband" or "You must be a horrible husband who hides things from your wife and doesn't do your share with the kids, house, etc."

So many posts like those, ALL the time here. Or posts determined that every OP must be the problem in any situation. The other classic: "Huh. Wonder what your spouse's side of the story is!" -- usually said with no further attempt to offer insights or actual advice.

This knee-jerk meanness and baiting is probably what prompts some OPs to try to hide genders. Agreed, it's annoying, but not as annoying as the inevitable responses saying, "If you posted here, you must be the one at fault/trolling/whining/nagging."

+1

[Anonymous]

Well, at least the complaints about grammar & typos is down. I mean, please. We all know the difference between your and you're and sometimes our fingers refuse to follow our brains. Or AutoCorrect. No need to call it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop with the gender hiding. It does not help us answer the questions. BTW I'm a woman. Somtimes I hate my husband. Do you know me? No??? that's because this forum is ANONYMOUS.

Right? Unless you are polygamous, stop referring to her/him in the plural!

[Anonymous]

What do you think is going on with your spouse's coworkers? Cheating?

[Anonymous]

To the poster who accused OP of stalking, how would you feel if you were in this situation? It's not stalking to wonder why your spouse is constantly texting others and has seemingly checked out of the marriage. It's normal curiosity, but apparently SOME people were born without any.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No sex for 4 years, no communication (roundabout questions are NOT the same as having a discussion about a problem), separate bedrooms with locked doors, but you refuse to confront spouse or to snoop?! How do you expect anything to change?

Weirdest post ever. OP your life is really strange and not at all like a healthy relationship should be - of course it’s ready to implode.
You are years of therapy away from having anything normal or healthy. You should try it in the least for your child.

Your life is very strange!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the poster who accused OP of stalking, how would you feel if you were in this situation? It's not stalking to wonder why your spouse is constantly texting others and has seemingly checked out of the marriage. It's normal curiosity, but apparently SOME people were born without any.

It’s dumb to not realize that no sex in 4 years meant that the marriage was over YEARS ago.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate when they try to hide the sex of the spouse.

+1. Ridiculous

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How anyone can live like this is beyond me. What are you getting out of it? Other than obvious financial support (which is nice).

I knew a couple like this (divorced now). They were living completely separate lives within their house. They emailed each other while they were both in the house to communicate. Email! Internally the husband was going through all kinds of turmoil (they're both a little off) and one day he picked up and took his stuff and most of the money and left the house and blind-sided her.

Communication is important!

She was only ‘blind-sided ‘ if she was immensely stupid and gullible. If you were her friend you should have helped her have a clue.