This is shade, right?

[Anonymous]

Post a picture of the jeans or a similar outfit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Shade AF. She's jealous. Hater.

Haha, you made me laugh, PP.

Thanks!

My dress is not unusual for where I work. I do not expect everyone to agree, though. I wanted to know if you all thought she was being a low-key biotch.

Serious question: why do you dress so slovenly at your office?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You were incredibly rude, OP. When someone asks you a question, you answer, and when you feel it comes with judgement, you are allowed to be short instead of courteous. But failing to answer and shaking your head is grossly offensive.

This person really wants to confirm which office, even if she previously thought you both worked for the same office, because she can't believe that they would let you wear that crap to work. Yes, she's judging, but she also asked you a question and you need to answer.

You do not come to work with ripped jeans.
You do not walk in the corridors with ear buds.
You answer questions.
You say please and thank you.

Where on earth do you come from that you don't know these basic social skills?

Oh, please.

[Anonymous]

how old are you? what is your job ? are you on track to be an executive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Shade AF. She's jealous. Hater.

Haha, you made me laugh, PP.

Thanks!

My dress is not unusual for where I work. I do not expect everyone to agree, though. I wanted to know if you all thought she was being a low-key biotch.

Serious question: why do you dress so slovenly at your office?

For the same reason she behaves so rudely to her co-workers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you didn't answer her question calmly and walk out, it sounds like you pretty much agree yourself you were dressed too casually.

If I thought I was dressed ok, I would answer her question and ignore the shade (which is there) and go on.

No, I didn't say anything because I didn't want to say something rude that I might regret later.

I'm glad you recognize the shade, though.

I've just one question, OP ... Where DO you work that you can dress so casually?

[Anonymous]

In the OP's defense, who was the other woman to be the self appointed fashion police?

[Anonymous]

Shade yes. And/or she didn't realize who you were.

But I say let it roll right off. I'm a big believer in pushing workplace sartorial standards as low as possible. And my ripped jeans make an appearance on casual Fridays. Not Thursday, I'm afraid. But jeans are explicitly forbidden except on fridays.

I'm not the ambitious type, though. I just work my tail off and assume no one is going to fire me for having holes in my jeans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work in a federal government office. Today, I'm wearing jeans, a dressy shirt, and warm/fuzzy boots. The jeans have knee holes, but they are not overly ripped. They're cute! (I am not dressed outside of my agency's approved dress code.)

I am listening to a podcast on my nano, and I walked to an elevator bay where there was another lady--an older lady. I know her (though, not well), and we work for the same office/directorate. She's asked me for help on something before, so I know she knows who I am. She has never been overly friendly.

We wait a few minutes for the elevator. After we're on the elevator, I hear her say, "Excuse me, miss! Miss!" (through the sound of the podcast I'm listening to).

I remove the ear bud, and tell her I'm sorry, I didn't hear her at first.

She said, "What office do you work for that lets you dress so casually?" I just looked at her dumbfounded. It definitely seemed like she was insulting me. I stared at her and sputtered from being caught of guard. She repeated her question--no smile, not friendly. I stared at her, shook my head, remained quiet, and walked out of the elevator once the door opened.

You guys, we work for the same office, so it definitely seemed like a bit of shade. Maybe I'm crazy, though.

She was telling you that she does not think you were dressed appropriately for work. Your response (or lack of response) was awkward. I can see how you were put on the spot and understand that you feel you were dressed appropriately, but it's rude not to respond to a direct question. You should have just answered her honestly ("I work in X office"). Also, it's rude to walk around with headphones on all the time. At your cubicle is fine. In the hallways and elevators, not so much.

[Anonymous]

What agency is this?

I was once told I was dressed too casually while wearing a skirt and blazer matching suit. The casual part was because I put sunglasses on top of my head when I came into the building. They probably would've had a coronary if I wore ripped jeans.

[Anonymous]

I don't think I would ever wear ripped anything to work no matter how "cute" I thought it looked. Save that shit for the weekend. And even then it's not cute unless you're 15.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the OP's defense, who was the other woman to be the self appointed fashion police?

I know, how rude of her. I would have just asked somebody else who she worked for.

[Anonymous]

It was probably the jeans with holes. To a lot of people, especially older people, that's crossing the line from casual to hobo, even though it's a style.

Below that would be wearing pajamas, daisy dukes, or bikini bottoms to work.

If she's older, she carried a lot of pressure and the burden to prove that women could be professionals as well as men, and every little detail of how women dressed was picked on.

I'm thrilled that things are more casual now. She might be too, but still has that internalized standard of appropriate dress, so she wondered and asked you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You were incredibly rude, OP. When someone asks you a question, you answer, and when you feel it comes with judgement, you are allowed to be short instead of courteous. But failing to answer and shaking your head is grossly offensive.

This person really wants to confirm which office, even if she previously thought you both worked for the same office, because she can't believe that they would let you wear that crap to work. Yes, she's judging, but she also asked you a question and you need to answer.

You do not come to work with ripped jeans.
You do not walk in the corridors with ear buds.
You answer questions.
You say please and thank you.

Where on earth do you come from that you don't know these basic social skills?

Agree with all of this. Also, the fact she called you "Miss" suggests she actually doesn't know who you are / where you currently work. Maybe she wants to work there so she can dress poorly too.

[Anonymous]

Once, the intern in the office came in with ripped jeans and I asked her if they were ripped on purpose.