Picky eater is parent's fault?

[Anonymous]

OP if you're concerned enough, make a list of questions to ask your pediatrician. If you don't choose a feeding therapist, you could also ask him/her for a referral to a pediatric gastroenterologist.

[Anonymous]

Your child is a junk food eater, OP - not a picky eater. Junk food is appealing to everyone because it is over processed and full of sugar (even pizza). Stop giving your child junk food and he will eat healthful whole foods eventually. The fact that you have that crap in your house IS your fault.

Try smoothies with fruit, yogurt and a green.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is a peanut butter cheese sandwich? Please say there should be and or between those words.

FYI, peanut butter and Swiss cheese is delicious!

OP. Yeah, it is a sandwich spread with peanut butter & a slice of cheese.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Pediatrician is not concerned for his eating & no referral is needed at this moment because my 2 year old does eat yogurt/peanut butter (mushy texture) & chicken nugget/pizza(need to chew) & dried mango (need teeth to tear). It is a variety of textures of food that he is able to eat, so no concern from pediatrician yet.

Yeah, he is a junk food eater & picker eater. I may try smoothie again, any good one to start one? I once try frozen veggie & apple & yogurt, it taste really yuk....

Thanks for all advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Pediatrician is not concerned for his eating & no referral is needed at this moment because my 2 year old does eat yogurt/peanut butter (mushy texture) & chicken nugget/pizza(need to chew) & dried mango (need teeth to tear). It is a variety of textures of food that he is able to eat, so no concern from pediatrician yet.

Yeah, he is a junk food eater & picker eater. I may try smoothie again, any good one to start one? I once try frozen veggie & apple & yogurt, it taste really yuk....

Thanks for all advice.

Strawberries, banana, whole milk Greek yogurt and a little apple juice to get it the right consistency for you child.

Stop buying and keeping junk food in your house.

[Anonymous]

Most of the time, yes. All kids are picky to some degree. When you feed that early on, it just gets worse as they get older. My kids are older and can still be picky, but we've drilled it into them to just eat what's put in front of you without complaining, especially if you are a guest at someone's house.

[Anonymous]

I worked in a day care with 2 year olds, and if a kid wouldn't eat anything we had to offer and parents packed something, I would feed that kid after the rest of the kids ate. I don't think it is always the parent. Often, yes, but not always. My gradndma fed me and my sister and my cousin the same food. Old fashioned home cooking, sister wouldn't touch most of it, cousin and I ate everything.

[Anonymous]

Offer him what you are eating every day. Even if it's just a little. Ask him to try it but don't push. Supplement with the foods he likes. I've been doing this for years. The trouble is when parents start serving pizza and chicken nuggets every night. Don't fall into that trap.

If we are having grilled chicken and roasted veggies my kids get grilled chicken and roasted veggies (they can dip both in ranch). I know my 4 year old won't eat a lot of that (few bites) so ill pair it with a yogurt, fruit and some butter/parm pasta so I know he won't go hungry. It's nice when they see you eating every night and the same food is on their plate. It's also less work for a parent then cooking a separate meal!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Offer him what you are eating every day. Even if it's just a little. Ask him to try it but don't push. Supplement with the foods he likes. I've been doing this for years. The trouble is when parents start serving pizza and chicken nuggets every night. Don't fall into that trap.

If we are having grilled chicken and roasted veggies my kids get grilled chicken and roasted veggies (they can dip both in ranch). I know my 4 year old won't eat a lot of that (few bites) so ill pair it with a yogurt, fruit and some butter/parm pasta so I know he won't go hungry. It's nice when they see you eating every night and the same food is on their plate. It's also less work for a parent then cooking a separate meal!

Giving your DC something else because he won't eat what you put in front of him is not helping him to become a less picky eater.

[Anonymous]

Keep some "healthy" muffins in the house (by which I mean good fats, whole grains, and sweetened with raisins or apple sauce instead of lots of sugar)--NYTimes has a recipe for morning glory muffins, I think Giada has a zucchini and carrot muffin, and just add fruit, coconut (or coconut oil), walnuts and sub in whole wheat flour and play around with it. If your kid will eat scrambled eggs, make that often.

Also, you asked for a smoothie recipe, so here is my current go to (recipe per person): 1 (big) spoonful whole fat greek yogurt, 1 (big) spoonful of almond butter, some chia seeds and wheat germ (maybe 1 small spoonful of each?), 1 date (if you like some sweetness), 1 cup-ish (or more if you like) frozen cherries, about 1/8 of one of those frozen bricks of spinach, some vanilla and/or almond extract, a little water to make it blend. Lots of good fats, and my kid loves it (and I do too).

Try to think of your kid's food intake over the week, not per meal. Some meals, my kid eats buttered toast and nothing else. sigh. sometimes he eats more chicken than an adult. Then he'll be really into buttered green beans and rice, but nothing else. But over the course of a week, I think it evens out.

Try to make sure at each meal there is at least something your kid will like--sometimes my kid will decide he's only eating rice, and then forget and try the other things. And we always have dessert after dinner (which often is fruit, or cheese--but sometimes is ice cream because duh). Don't make him a second meal (though if we are having a leftovers meal, I let him have whatever he wants of the leftovers), and don't fight him on what he's eating.

And good luck! I think you said your kid is two, so this is still pretty normal. For the record, I don't think picky eating is the parents' fault, but I do think we can make sure our kids are exposed to new flavors, and learn how to be polite about encountering food they don't like (with time...and lots of patience, and swiffer wipes hahaha)

[sunnyface]

Picky eaters can be a challenge! Good job on preparing healthy meals and doing your best to encourage your child to eat a balanced meal. My daughter was the same way. There was a handful of foods that she liked and it was in phases. Pasta and peas for awhile and then on to something else. I found that basic meals helped. She could distinguish which foods were before her. If it was in a casserole or a stir-fry...forget it! Your pediatrician could certainly help you figure out if your child has allergies to certain foods. The doctor could also give you tips on how to keep your child’s meals balanced. I recently came across this article, http://bit.ly/2sDQ7NX, about a picky preschooler. Perhaps, you can find some helpful information here. It sounds like you are doing all you can and I give you a high-five for your efforts!

[Anonymous]

Sounds exactly like my 5 year old. He was like this from birth, whereas my second kid is much more flexible (picky within a normal range but still eats way more than the older kid). I have always wondered about a sensory issue but have never found anything that anyone felt was worth following up on, and he's doing fine, so it's not causing any major issues (besides also being very low in weight, below 5th percentile).

Read Ellyn Satter, as was suggested. I recommend continuing to do what you are doing but restructuring it a bit. Instead of "giving in" when he doesn't eat what you provide, plan meals so that you provide something that he's very likely to eat on a more regular basis and/or with each meal. For example, if you know that he'll eat toast, then provide him with a dinner you think it's super appealing to him (whatever that might be -- maybe spaghetti and meatballs), but provide toast on the side. If he's really hungry, he eats the toast. No other options will be provided, but he can eat as much toast as he wants (though you always put some of the entree on his plate). Never force or even suggest anything about the other food. Just give it and allow him to make the choices. Don't comment if he tries something new or if he doesn't.

Another thing I try to do is to alternate so that if I serve him a lunch that's pretty undesirable to him, I offer a snack a few hours later that may be one of his healthy-but-favorite items (like yogurt, perhaps). This way, he isn't starving because he's getting other options but not as an alternative to the meal and not at mealtime.

I'm not sure that daycare will help. They told me this, too, and it didn't make any difference for my kid. All the other kids could happily devour blueberries or raspberries, and my kid would be like, "No way am I eating those!" Though once pizza became "cool" and he became aware of this (around age 4), he did finally try it -- and now only eats it without sauce but loves it if I make it or order it like that. But daycare also won't hurt anything, so don't stress about it.

Ultimately, I feel like you just have to go with the flow and try not to stress too much. Keep offering healthy choices, and eventually, your kid will eat it. My kid basically has refused grilled chicken every time I've offered for the past 6 months (he previously did eat it, even though it wasn't ever a favorite). Today I gave him grilled chicken for dinner, and he asked for seconds and thirds and raved about how this was his favorite dinner ever. Kids are weird!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds exactly like my 5 year old. He was like this from birth, whereas my second kid is much more flexible (picky within a normal range but still eats way more than the older kid). I have always wondered about a sensory issue but have never found anything that anyone felt was worth following up on, and he's doing fine, so it's not causing any major issues (besides also being very low in weight, below 5th percentile).

Read Ellyn Satter, as was suggested. I recommend continuing to do what you are doing but restructuring it a bit. Instead of "giving in" when he doesn't eat what you provide, plan meals so that you provide something that he's very likely to eat on a more regular basis and/or with each meal. For example, if you know that he'll eat toast, then provide him with a dinner you think it's super appealing to him (whatever that might be -- maybe spaghetti and meatballs), but provide toast on the side. If he's really hungry, he eats the toast. No other options will be provided, but he can eat as much toast as he wants (though you always put some of the entree on his plate). Never force or even suggest anything about the other food. Just give it and allow him to make the choices. Don't comment if he tries something new or if he doesn't.

Another thing I try to do is to alternate so that if I serve him a lunch that's pretty undesirable to him, I offer a snack a few hours later that may be one of his healthy-but-favorite items (like yogurt, perhaps). This way, he isn't starving because he's getting other options but not as an alternative to the meal and not at mealtime.

I'm not sure that daycare will help. They told me this, too, and it didn't make any difference for my kid. All the other kids could happily devour blueberries or raspberries, and my kid would be like, "No way am I eating those!" Though once pizza became "cool" and he became aware of this (around age 4), he did finally try it -- and now only eats it without sauce but loves it if I make it or order it like that. But daycare also won't hurt anything, so don't stress about it.

Ultimately, I feel like you just have to go with the flow and try not to stress too much. Keep offering healthy choices, and eventually, your kid will eat it. My kid basically has refused grilled chicken every time I've offered for the past 6 months (he previously did eat it, even though it wasn't ever a favorite). Today I gave him grilled chicken for dinner, and he asked for seconds and thirds and raved about how this was his favorite dinner ever. Kids are weird!!!

PP here. I just want to clarify that I don't actually mean "eventually your kid will eat it." If your kid is like mine, your kid probably won't eat it. But he may eat SOME of the new things that you offer over time. Even if this is only a handful of things, at least it's something. I have learned not to stress too much about it, even though I wish things were different. It's just not worth it. My kid has a relatively low appetite in general but loves junk food, so we just try to limit sweets and junk food but go with the flow besides that.

[Anonymous]

Here's the issue I see: how does your kid even know what all this junk food is? Pizza, chicken nuggets, etc were introduced by you. If the parents models bad eating it shouldn't be a surprise that your kid is following your example.

Even before age 2 my kid knew that we didn't keep junk food in the house and they didn't ask for it. Simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here's the issue I see: how does your kid even know what all this junk food is? Pizza, chicken nuggets, etc were introduced by you. If the parents models bad eating it shouldn't be a surprise that your kid is following your example.

Even before age 2 my kid knew that we didn't keep junk food in the house and they didn't ask for it. Simple.

NP +1

My 2 and 4 year olds know what pizza and ice-cream are because they see them in books and sometimes educational programs include them too (in songs or lessons about shapes etc).

Neither of them have ever tasted one.

e.g. They will do trick or treating but trade candy with me for something healthy. They know candy isn't real food.

99% of children would prefer to eat junk. Junk food is made in factories by scientists who use chemicals to try to make food especially tasty and addictive (in addition to cheap and self stable). It's not a fault of the child that they'd prefer to eat junk food.

My kids eat nothing but good stuff (good quality meat, tons of veggies, lot of fruit and a small bit of good quality grains).... because there's nothing else coming. There hasn't been a precedent, so the thought of demanding something else wouldn't even occur to them. Sometimes they complain that dinner "isn't tasty" but I explain that's okay, it will help us all to be big and strong, and tomorrow there will be something different. I've given them junk food instead of dinner exactly zero times.

If your child is demanding junk, it absolutely is the parents' fault. I know it's not easy. Sometimes I'd freaking LOVE to stick some fish fingers in the microwave or to order a pizza. But feeding my kids nourishing food is one of my core roles of a parent, IMO.