Leaving husband after 30 years

[Anonymous]

Skip the trip, and meet with as many divorce lawyers in town as you can while he's gone so you can choose the one you like best. Bonus: none of them can represent him if they've met with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is he the one that was traveling for a month with his "friend"?

The same. Now he's back and dictating this and that. He can have it. I'm kicking him to the curb, getting a condo with no lawn work and keeping my own money. He can have his new car, new lathe, new computer and trips and he can pay for them out of his $. Why would I keep a husband who hasn't touched me in 20 years and makes me feel like shit about myself? I was far happier and more productive while he was gone. Now he's been back 48 hours and I wish he were still gone. Calling lawyer tomorrow.

Problem: We're supposed to go to beach with four other couples on Saturday. Go and fake it or not?

I have to say OP- I would not have the "he can have it" attitude. Divorce is kind of like a war- you want to be level headed, but it's a negotiation. I worked in family law and routinely saw men who were ready to fight and women who just wanted things to be civil. So the guy would go in it with a fighting attitude and come out with way more, because the woman was willing to acquiesce to end it. Divorce is hell but don't take it lying down, don't give him many things. Fight each thing he wants because guaranteed you will have things divided out unfairly anyway- but if you are lobbying and fighting your chances of getting more go way up

[Anonymous]

LOL what an idiot he is! He thinks by putting all these assets in his name he will get to keep them??? I would pay big money to see the look in his face when he finds out half is yours. This is going to be good.

Get an attorney and you will learn real fast that you will get to take half of the toys and go home while he stands there and cries.

Please update us on his reaction. Its gonna be a good one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Skip the trip, and meet with as many divorce lawyers in town as you can while he's gone so you can choose the one you like best. Bonus: none of them can represent him if they've met with you.

Yesss! Worth the cost of each session

[Anonymous]

PLEASE TONIGHT document the money in each account TONIGHT. Because so many men move stuff around and then it's "Oh yeah, this account has $5k in it- did you want to split it?" and the woman gets screwed out of thousands because she has no proof the account used to have 600k. Seriously, it happens ALL THE TIME.

[Anonymous]

Consider getting a forensic accountant if you have the sense he's hiding assets

[Anonymous]

Pray that it rains so the beach day gets cancelled.

If it is bright + sunny, fake an early flu.
Or a UTI.

And yes, divorce this man who would actually tell you in no uncertain terms that divorcing you would even be considered an option.

At least you now know where you exist on his food chain.

[Anonymous]

I am praying for rain. We set up the beach house rental this year so I'm going for the first couple of days, whatever he decides. I'm dreading the house sale/move more than the divorce itself. I am so ready to be rid of him and his selfishness. I'm pretty sure he's gay and has been using me as a "beard" for years. His long trip was with a male friend. I'm scared to be going it alone as all our friends are married but I'm determined.

[Anonymous]

Wait a second. How can he have been home for 48 hours, when you said last night that he wasn't coming home until this morning? Get your story straight, crazy lady.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait a second. How can he have been home for 48 hours, when you said last night that he wasn't coming home until this morning? Get your story straight, crazy lady.

He had been home for 48 hours when I wrote the initial post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consider getting a forensic accountant if you have the sense he's hiding assets

Good luck. My exDW stole a lot of marital assets and I was unable to recover them. "Possession is 9/10 of the law".

[Anonymous]

If you live in DC, it is DEFINITELY marital property and if he tries to hide it in a divorce and your attorney brings it to a judge's attention, he will potentially be put in jail for contempt of court.

[Anonymous]

You do the other couples no favor by going. Please don't go.

[Anonymous]

If you live in DC, it is DEFINITELY marital property and if he tries to hide it in a divorce and your attorney brings it to a judge's attention, he will potentially be put in jail for contempt of court.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you live in DC, it is DEFINITELY marital property and if he tries to hide it in a divorce and your attorney brings it to a judge's attention, he will potentially be put in jail for contempt of court.

If that was the case the jails would be overflowing with people jailed on contempt of court. In reality, nothing happens.