Tales from the beach house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Adults get their own place, and pay their own way

OP here. We are paying our full share for this rental. You're saying families should each get their own, separate unit? How odd. It's a big house.

[Anonymous]

1. Your FIL sounds fine.
2. I hate Crazy Cat Ladies and have no patience for talk of cats.
3. Why is the wife doing laundry? How long is your vacation that you need to do multiple loads of laundry?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Beach vacation with my husband, kids and ILs (FIL/MIL, older aunt/cousin, SIL and her wife and kid). All is going well, and we are having fun. But I thought I'd send some dispatches:

1) SIL's wife is pregnant and is making much of it. She sleeps all day/stays in her room, doesn't watch her 1.5 year old AT ALL, and has her wife running all over at her beck and call: bringing her food, doing her laundry, making special requests like "no coffee this morning, please, my wife is feeling nauseous." We are all rolling with it, but come ON. You are pregnant, it's really not that big a deal.


2) FIL's kitchen habits are kind of funny but kind of gross: microwaving coffee in the late afternoon that had been sitting cold still on the burner all day; standing in the kitchen eating rather than ever sitting down.

3) MIL pretending never to eat indulgent food or drink alcohol, but indulging at every opportunity. It's OK! You can eat and drink, we won't judge!

4) The aunt is a crazy cat lady: any time any of the kids do or say something cute, she launches into a story about her 7 cats. She FaceTimes with her cats via the pet-sitter twice daily.

1) wait, they're saying she doesn't want coffee, or that no one in the house should brew coffee?

2) that's really not that bad at all. at least he's not wasting or hogging the best sofa in the house like other people i've gone on vacation with.

OP here. Yeah, they're saying no one should brew coffee because SIL's wife (who is sleeping in on the lower third level and the kitchen is on the top floor) might smell it.

Lolol. Pretty sure she doesn't want to meet me without my morning coffee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents (DH's parents) told us our kids wandering around in their undies or just shorts inside their house made them uncomfortable. Now we are scrambling to keep them dressed without making them feel weird about their bodies but I can't explain why they want them in clothes because even when they explained it I didn't understand. I just agreed to keep the peace. We've just started saying "grandma wants it this way".

They are 8, 7 and 4 and my grandmother actually said 'she isn't wearing a shirt and she is a young woman!' about the 7 yr old. I corrected her and said 'no, she is a little girl' but I don't want you uncomfortable so that's fine. They are all very skinny- as are his parents- no boobs in sight.

To be clear, it's just us and the grandparents. No visitors/other family. No huge windows where people can see in. My DH is perplexed and we are trying to think where/why this came from. They've never said a thing in our house in DC when they were shirtless. I'm starting to wonder if someone touched grandma as a child

Uh, yeah, they should be clothed at that age, PP.

OP here, and I agree with the PP who agrees that the kids at that age should be clothed. YOU are actually the weird one, no-clothes mom. People are writing about their ILs meaning YOU in this scenario. Why would they not be wearing clothes-clothes, bathing suits and cover ups, or pajamas at least?

I'm not no-clothes mum. Children do need clothes. They are clothed. In underwear, swim trunks or shorts on the bottom. For some reason that isn't enough. (I'm not talking about eating meals at the table without a shirt- we don't do that). Please explain because we are lost (and obviously DH grew up in their home and is annoyed but going along with it).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents (DH's parents) told us our kids wandering around in their undies or just shorts inside their house made them uncomfortable. Now we are scrambling to keep them dressed without making them feel weird about their bodies but I can't explain why they want them in clothes because even when they explained it I didn't understand. I just agreed to keep the peace. We've just started saying "grandma wants it this way".

They are 8, 7 and 4 and my grandmother actually said 'she isn't wearing a shirt and she is a young woman!' about the 7 yr old. I corrected her and said 'no, she is a little girl' but I don't want you uncomfortable so that's fine. They are all very skinny- as are his parents- no boobs in sight.

To be clear, it's just us and the grandparents. No visitors/other family. No huge windows where people can see in. My DH is perplexed and we are trying to think where/why this came from. They've never said a thing in our house in DC when they were shirtless. I'm starting to wonder if someone touched grandma as a child

Uh, yeah, they should be clothed at that age, PP.

OP here, and I agree with the PP who agrees that the kids at that age should be clothed. YOU are actually the weird one, no-clothes mom. People are writing about their ILs meaning YOU in this scenario. Why would they not be wearing clothes-clothes, bathing suits and cover ups, or pajamas at least?

I'm not no-clothes mum. Children do need clothes. They are clothed. In underwear, swim trunks or shorts on the bottom. For some reason that isn't enough. (I'm not talking about eating meals at the table without a shirt- we don't do that). Please explain because we are lost (and obviously DH grew up in their home and is annoyed but going along with it).

Actually, no they don't need to be clothed. This is why Americans are so hung up on sex - in Europe not a big deal. Good lord. They only need clothes when it is cold

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents (DH's parents) told us our kids wandering around in their undies or just shorts inside their house made them uncomfortable. Now we are scrambling to keep them dressed without making them feel weird about their bodies but I can't explain why they want them in clothes because even when they explained it I didn't understand. I just agreed to keep the peace. We've just started saying "grandma wants it this way".

They are 8, 7 and 4 and my grandmother actually said 'she isn't wearing a shirt and she is a young woman!' about the 7 yr old. I corrected her and said 'no, she is a little girl' but I don't want you uncomfortable so that's fine. They are all very skinny- as are his parents- no boobs in sight.

To be clear, it's just us and the grandparents. No visitors/other family. No huge windows where people can see in. My DH is perplexed and we are trying to think where/why this came from. They've never said a thing in our house in DC when they were shirtless. I'm starting to wonder if someone touched grandma as a child

Uh, yeah, they should be clothed at that age, PP.

OP here, and I agree with the PP who agrees that the kids at that age should be clothed. YOU are actually the weird one, no-clothes mom. People are writing about their ILs meaning YOU in this scenario. Why would they not be wearing clothes-clothes, bathing suits and cover ups, or pajamas at least?

I'm not no-clothes mum. Children do need clothes. They are clothed. In underwear, swim trunks or shorts on the bottom. For some reason that isn't enough. (I'm not talking about eating meals at the table without a shirt- we don't do that). Please explain because we are lost (and obviously DH grew up in their home and is annoyed but going along with it).

j

It's just trashy for kids that old not to be wearing clothes and running around in underwear. If it's just transitioning from one activity to the next (like just coming in and are in process of getting showered and dressed, or from pajamas in process of getting dressed into suits), that's fine. But if it's an *8 year old* running around with no clothes on? Hello, no, not appropriate.

Put clothes on your kids. Really.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The pretending-not-to-eat MIL...I have one of those, too. Is it a generational thing or an old people thing?

NP with a similar MIL. I think it's a disordered eating thing. Noticing/monitoring/observing and commenting on whether people are heavy or thin, what people are eating and how much, constantly announcing what she herself is eating or not eating/drinking. It's CONSTANT.

I have one of these, too! I think it's both generational and eating disordered; you know, women were supposed to refuse both indulgent and high-calorie things, and, to a certain extent, I think my MIL actually believes she doesn't eat this stuff. But she does.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Beach vacation with my husband, kids and ILs (FIL/MIL, older aunt/cousin, SIL and her wife and kid). All is going well, and we are having fun. But I thought I'd send some dispatches:

1) SIL's wife is pregnant and is making much of it. She sleeps all day/stays in her room, doesn't watch her 1.5 year old AT ALL, and has her wife running all over at her beck and call: bringing her food, doing her laundry, making special requests like "no coffee this morning, please, my wife is feeling nauseous." We are all rolling with it, but come ON. You are pregnant, it's really not that big a deal.


2) FIL's kitchen habits are kind of funny but kind of gross: microwaving coffee in the late afternoon that had been sitting cold still on the burner all day; standing in the kitchen eating rather than ever sitting down.

3) MIL pretending never to eat indulgent food or drink alcohol, but indulging at every opportunity. It's OK! You can eat and drink, we won't judge!

4) The aunt is a crazy cat lady: any time any of the kids do or say something cute, she launches into a story about her 7 cats. She FaceTimes with her cats via the pet-sitter twice daily.

1) wait, they're saying she doesn't want coffee, or that no one in the house should brew coffee?

2) that's really not that bad at all. at least he's not wasting or hogging the best sofa in the house like other people i've gone on vacation with.

OP here. Yeah, they're saying no one should brew coffee because SIL's wife (who is sleeping in on the lower third level and the kitchen is on the top floor) might smell it.

haha. yeah, right.

[Anonymous]

Um look the pregnant woman can hide all she wants, whatever. But no way in hell I'm "not making coffee".

And I totally warm up old coffee in the afternoon. I'm lazy! And an old man apparently.

I would not keep shirts on the children. Grandma can deal with her own issues. It's the beach! Everyone is naked all the time. We just put some flimsy spandex on and it's acceptable now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:1. Your FIL sounds fine.
2. I hate Crazy Cat Ladies and have no patience for talk of cats.
3. Why is the wife doing laundry? How long is your vacation that you need to do multiple loads of laundry?

We do laundry every day at the beach -- at least the sandy towels.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents (DH's parents) told us our kids wandering around in their undies or just shorts inside their house made them uncomfortable. Now we are scrambling to keep them dressed without making them feel weird about their bodies but I can't explain why they want them in clothes because even when they explained it I didn't understand. I just agreed to keep the peace. We've just started saying "grandma wants it this way".

They are 8, 7 and 4 and my grandmother actually said 'she isn't wearing a shirt and she is a young woman!' about the 7 yr old. I corrected her and said 'no, she is a little girl' but I don't want you uncomfortable so that's fine. They are all very skinny- as are his parents- no boobs in sight.

To be clear, it's just us and the grandparents. No visitors/other family. No huge windows where people can see in. My DH is perplexed and we are trying to think where/why this came from. They've never said a thing in our house in DC when they were shirtless. I'm starting to wonder if someone touched grandma as a child

Uh, yeah, they should be clothed at that age, PP.

OP here, and I agree with the PP who agrees that the kids at that age should be clothed. YOU are actually the weird one, no-clothes mom. People are writing about their ILs meaning YOU in this scenario. Why would they not be wearing clothes-clothes, bathing suits and cover ups, or pajamas at least?

I'm not no-clothes mum. Children do need clothes. They are clothed. In underwear, swim trunks or shorts on the bottom. For some reason that isn't enough. (I'm not talking about eating meals at the table without a shirt- we don't do that). Please explain because we are lost (and obviously DH grew up in their home and is annoyed but going along with it).

Actually, no they don't need to be clothed. This is why Americans are so hung up on sex - in Europe not a big deal. Good lord. They only need clothes when it is cold

This is what I am thinking. I was raised in Canada and the UK where nudity is not a big thing. I think I've rubbed off on DH because he doesn't care. Again, the kids aren't nude. but apparently pants/shorts aren't enough. It's not worth it to say anything, but I can't unknow this so when we get back home from the beach it will be on my mind any time the parents are over and my kids are bouncing around doing their underpants dance. /ooops

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Um look the pregnant woman can hide all she wants, whatever. But no way in hell I'm "not making coffee".

And I totally warm up old coffee in the afternoon. I'm lazy! And an old man apparently.

I would not keep shirts on the children. Grandma can deal with her own issues. It's the beach! Everyone is naked all the time. We just put some flimsy spandex on and it's acceptable now.

This. I also reuse teabags- not for others but for myself. I chuck them out at the end of each day.

[Anonymous]

Just went on vacation with my parents. The comments made about food was absurd. My poor teenagers! My mom kept badgering my kids to eat walnuts saying it was good for their eyesight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents (DH's parents) told us our kids wandering around in their undies or just shorts inside their house made them uncomfortable. Now we are scrambling to keep them dressed without making them feel weird about their bodies but I can't explain why they want them in clothes because even when they explained it I didn't understand. I just agreed to keep the peace. We've just started saying "grandma wants it this way".

They are 8, 7 and 4 and my grandmother actually said 'she isn't wearing a shirt and she is a young woman!' about the 7 yr old. I corrected her and said 'no, she is a little girl' but I don't want you uncomfortable so that's fine. They are all very skinny- as are his parents- no boobs in sight.

To be clear, it's just us and the grandparents. No visitors/other family. No huge windows where people can see in. My DH is perplexed and we are trying to think where/why this came from. They've never said a thing in our house in DC when they were shirtless. I'm starting to wonder if someone touched grandma as a child

Uh, yeah, they should be clothed at that age, PP.

OP here, and I agree with the PP who agrees that the kids at that age should be clothed. YOU are actually the weird one, no-clothes mom. People are writing about their ILs meaning YOU in this scenario. Why would they not be wearing clothes-clothes, bathing suits and cover ups, or pajamas at least?

I think it's weird that you're afraid dressing them will make them feel weird about their bodies. Does wearing shorts in the house make them feel weird about their bodies? My son wears underwear, shorts, and a shirt when we are on vacation with the extended family, yet he doesn't seem to feel weird about his body at all. Seriously, ask your daughter: "Larla, does wearing a shirt make you feel weird about your body?" If she says "YES," then I fear you've mishandled the part of parenting where you introduce the general concept of wearing clothes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents (DH's parents) told us our kids wandering around in their undies or just shorts inside their house made them uncomfortable. Now we are scrambling to keep them dressed without making them feel weird about their bodies but I can't explain why they want them in clothes because even when they explained it I didn't understand. I just agreed to keep the peace. We've just started saying "grandma wants it this way".

They are 8, 7 and 4 and my grandmother actually said 'she isn't wearing a shirt and she is a young woman!' about the 7 yr old. I corrected her and said 'no, she is a little girl' but I don't want you uncomfortable so that's fine. They are all very skinny- as are his parents- no boobs in sight.

To be clear, it's just us and the grandparents. No visitors/other family. No huge windows where people can see in. My DH is perplexed and we are trying to think where/why this came from. They've never said a thing in our house in DC when they were shirtless. I'm starting to wonder if someone touched grandma as a child

Uh, yeah, they should be clothed at that age, PP.

Meh, we're loosey goosey with kids wearing clothes too. NBD