Would you pay your kids tuition?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have them take out loans and then if they do well surprise them by paying them off as a graduation present. That way they'll have some skin in the game and actually value their education but not start out in life with unnecessary (you said you can pay for it) student loan debt.

Except the interest starts the second you take out the loan. And the rates are pretty high. All DH's loans were in the 6% range.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have them take out loans and then if they do well surprise them by paying them off as a graduation present. That way they'll have some skin in the game and actually value their education but not start out in life with unnecessary (you said you can pay for it) student loan debt.

Except the interest starts the second you take out the loan. And the rates are pretty high. All DH's loans were in the 6% range.

Only on unsubsidized loans, but you do have a half-valid point.

[Anonymous]

I think a better question is why wouldn't you pay the tuition? I would pay in a heartbeat and do plan to pay for all FOUR of our children's college tuition.

[Anonymous]

Without question I would pay. You failed them by not expecting them to work or have internships doing the summer. That is your fauthem.lt not theirs. They are only "spoiled" because of how you choose to raise them and what you have taught

[Anonymous]

Your kids did their job. They worked hard in school and were admitted into some of the most selective schools in the country. You did not do your job and apparently did not discuss how college would be financed before they applied. And not you want to change it up and make them scramble for solutions to pay for school and end up with debt they were not planning on.
I suggest all of you sit down like adults and go over what you can afford and what you expect of them financially if you want them to contribute. A debt free start to adult life is a great gift you can give to your children if you can afford it.

[Anonymous]

you all have some very valid points. I was raised in a very frugal way with immigrant parents, and while I made it all the way to the top it was very hard for me to learn the value of the dollar.

While I wanted them to learn the value of the dollar by having jobs, etc. I paid for private schools, tutors, extra curricular activities, etc.
Actually my one twin got an early admit into Harvard.
Thing is that they are not as financially adept as I would like them to be.

The idea of having to pay some or the full tuition at the end is a great one but I know they will do more than great because they have been wired like that, ave gpa for both is over 4.0.

Maybe I will cover the tuition now with your feedback

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My first twin got accepted in Harvard and my second got accepted in Yale and MIT
however being the cheapskate that I am, and wanting to teach them the value of the dollar am against paying for their education. And yes they are plenty spoiled and never have worked in their life. I could pay for both of their education today with cash but not sure if I should do it or not. What do you all think? I am leaning towards them getting a loan for their schools.

A loan at market rate would be onerous.

I would pay their tuition, they have obviously excelled. Have them be responsible for their spending money. You pay R&B, tuition &N fees, and books (and keep them on your healthcare). They do the rest, including a car if they so choose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I personally think I would pay tuition and rooms and board and have them get a summer job if they want spending money.

This

[Anonymous]

If they were mine, I would split it with them, or make them pay at least 25% of it. I'd have them take out loans to cover a portion of it so they feel the urgency to graduate in 4 years, and I would pay the rest. Any spending money beyond costs for food will be on them, including car payments, spring break trips, etc.

[Anonymous]

do you have any insight as to what motivated your children to succeed?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:you all have some very valid points. I was raised in a very frugal way with immigrant parents, and while I made it all the way to the top it was very hard for me to learn the value of the dollar.

While I wanted them to learn the value of the dollar by having jobs, etc. I paid for private schools, tutors, extra curricular activities, etc.
Actually my one twin got an early admit into Harvard.
Thing is that they are not as financially adept as I would like them to be.

The idea of having to pay some or the full tuition at the end is a great one but I know they will do more than great because they have been wired like that, ave gpa for both is over 4.0.

Maybe I will cover the tuition now with your feedback

OP you can throw them off the deep end when they graduate and get good jobs. Don't give them credit cards after graduation and make them learn to budget what money they make. Lots of us learn finances that way. Student loans are not fun. Also, due to your high salary, your kids won't get any sort of scholarships for low income students they might have gotten.

[Anonymous]

I paid zero dollars for undergrad. I got a 3.8 at a SLAC and got into law school. I manage money well.

Money management skills, and a good relationship with money, comes from a lifetime of lessons. Not a single move re: paying for college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I paid zero dollars for undergrad. I got a 3.8 at a SLAC and got into law school. I manage money well.

Money management skills, and a good relationship with money, comes from a lifetime of lessons. Not a single move re: paying for college.

Same here, although I got an MBA. I paid for the MBA but my parents paid for college. I have been very successful. Similarly we've paid our kids full tuition and extras and both kids have very good money management skills and work hard. Both kids have worked summers in high school and college - not always for pay in high school but definitely for pay in college. One is out now, got a job quickly and is self supporting.

OP you need to pay for college but you also need to start teaching your children about money management. If they are spoiled that's on you, not on them. They don't need to work during the school year, but they should definitely work in the summer, starting this summer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they were mine, I would split it with them, or make them pay at least 25% of it. I'd have them take out loans to cover a portion of it so they feel the urgency to graduate in 4 years, and I would pay the rest. Any spending money beyond costs for food will be on them, including car payments, spring break trips, etc.

that is also another solid advice. I am leaning towards doing something like this.

I am just jealous that I had to do a bunch of shit jobs while I was growing up and in college. I did everything back in the day to get me some food. Not the same today with my kids. They are like mega spoiled compared to what I had to go through

[Anonymous]

You're a POS parent if you don't pay for them. What they've achieved is HUGE. And the fact that they are spoiled and don't know the value of a dollar is YOUR fault. You had shortcomings as a parent. They didn't have shortcomings as kids. Go ahead, tell them you won't pay for it. See where that relationship goes. You'd be lucky to ever see your kids again, and rightfully so.