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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Ex is trying to black mail me
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Anonymous
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If you give him pictures, then he can threaten to send them to your family.
Contact the police. Also maybe look at why you let the men in your life exert so much control over you. Never speaking to you over who you dated is some seriously controlling shit and is messed up. I get it's a cultural thing but it's really not okay for a father to try to control his adult daughters body. If my dad did that, I'd tell him to fuck off (and then be totally fine with not speaking to him). |
Anonymous
Sorry, you should refuse to live your life in fear. That guy has no hold over you. He can go to your family and say whatever he wants. Your father will seek confirmation, you will downplay it, he'll go off in a huff, maybe for months or years. The point is - you have done nothing wrong, and have nothing to hide. If other people want to have fits, it's their problem. |
Anonymous
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Maybe you're underestimating your dad. My Turkish sister in law started dating a Jamaican black man 7 years ago. When her dad first found out, he didn't speak to her for a few weeks. Now, that Jamaican man is her husband (dad walked her down the aisle), a full time employee in the family business, and they have a lovely baby together.
If you're scared your family will disown you, just lie and say the guy's obsessed with you. Does he have proof you were together? Your family is much more likely to believe you than some stranger. Turn on the tears. |
Anonymous
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Do not give him naked pictures. as others have said, he will use these against you.
Go to the police. If you can, get a lawyer. |
Anonymous
| I would let him know that you will be going to police. I imagine he will stop threatening you. |
Anonymous
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Ask him to send a request in writing and you'll looknit over with your lawyer.
I have a strong reaction to people who try to create power by causing this kind of fear. He has serious problems if he thinks this is ok. Look into getting a restraining order. |
Anonymous
| I agree with calling the Police. If they get involved it may scare him enough to crawl back under his rock. |
Anonymous
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Call the police. It's the only way to stop him from blackmailing/bothering you in the future.
If you don't do it, he will not stop. |
Anonymous
| File a restraining order against him. |
Anonymous
| Ditto, call the cops. It's the only way to deal with this. He won't contact your parents if the cops are onto him. That would be a crime, and he could be prosecuted for it. But only if you tell the cops what he's done. Show the cops the text. Give the cops his contact information. They will take it from there. |
Anonymous
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this is domestic violence too. Harassing and blackmail. If you live in Montgomery county, the Family Justice Center can help. With protective orders, criminal charges, housing if you need it, all sorts of things.
Please don't give him pictures. http://www.montgomerycountymd.gov/FJC/ |
Anonymous
| Your father will definitely never speak to you again if your ex has naked photos of you. Call the police, explain the situation, and ask them what to do. Be prepared for your parents to find out about your ex. That's the only way to keep control of your life and remove any hold your psych-ex has over you. Call the police. |
Anonymous
Tell him that you've already confessed, and your dad was surprisingly accepting. |
Anonymous
probably should've thought about that before dating someone who would pump-and-dump you. |
Anonymous
| OP, go to the police. They can't help you with your dad's control, but they can hopefully get the ex to back off. |