SIL intentionally hurts my feelings

[Anonymous]

I would not respond to any communication that is not in person, but i would make sure my husband saw every word of it. Otherwise he might brush off these exchanges for years without realizing that it's the water torture.

Then if ever she says something to your face, you can break out the "Bless your heart" or "I'm very happy with my life" kind of comment.

[Anonymous]

You SIL is an bit**. I mean what normal person texts another person that she needs to get a job, stop being SAHM? This is beyond intrusive and rude. She must be one of those, my brother is mine and you stole him from me people. You could be The President and she would still hate you. Distance yourself as much as you can, stop replying to anything. Or just plain tell her, or text her, "Thanks, when I need your opinion about... I will ask you. For now I am good making my own decisions." I always try to look at all angles, but what a biatch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You SIL is an bit**. I mean what normal person texts another person that she needs to get a job, stop being SAHM? This is beyond intrusive and rude. She must be one of those, my brother is mine and you stole him from me people. You could be The President and she would still hate you. Distance yourself as much as you can, stop replying to anything. Or just plain tell her, or text her, "Thanks, when I need your opinion about... I will ask you. For now I am good making my own decisions." I always try to look at all angles, but what a biatch.

If it's not polite I'll ask DH to address it from now on. Bad idea?

[Anonymous]

If I had SILs other than my crazy SIL, I'd think that you were related. My SIL texted DH out of the to ask him about Debbie Downer (me, apparently! And I'm not a negative person), ranted about me, and then said "p.s., (DD) isn't cute". She also send me nasty emails because DH sent her a birthday card. At least she didn't tear it up, though?

MIL thinks it's no big deal and that we need to open our hearts to her and forgive, in her words. Instead, we've blocked her many email addresses and ignore calls from any burner numbers (SIL won't pay for a cell plan and instead buys burner phones as if she's in an episode of the Wire). She's actually been hospitalized but never longer than the point at which you have to voluntarily agree to stay.

You're not alone, but there isn't a solution to crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ignore it. I'm a SAHM of SAC and you have to develop a thick skin and backbone for those comments. People are relentless.

I'm genuinely curious why you need SACC? Not judging!

[Anonymous]

Always knock on a used door. This is manners 101. You also wait for "come in".

[Anonymous]

Closed door^^

[Anonymous]

What is SAC?

I would ignore. Seriously. You teach people how to treat you and she has learned how to push your buttons. Stop reacting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You SIL is an bit**. I mean what normal person texts another person that she needs to get a job, stop being SAHM? This is beyond intrusive and rude. She must be one of those, my brother is mine and you stole him from me people. You could be The President and she would still hate you. Distance yourself as much as you can, stop replying to anything. Or just plain tell her, or text her, "Thanks, when I need your opinion about... I will ask you. For now I am good making my own decisions." I always try to look at all angles, but what a biatch.

If it's not polite I'll ask DH to address it from now on. Bad idea?

I don't know. I think your SIL is crazy, in some way. Your DH might not be seeing it, since she might play a total angel with him. What will be the consequences for your DH and you if he tell her to stay out of your life and marriage. Will she blame you? There is just no telling, you can't behave like you do with a normal person. She is a bully, imo. Stand up to her, she will fight back, is what I would do, but I am not scared of burning the bridges. I am that kind of person, I will forgive a lot, I don't forget, but there is a line and then all bets are off when somebody crosses that line. IMO, she has crossed that line. On the other hand if you know she is really completely insane, you might want to take a high road here. You have to decide, she is beyond rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to f*ck off! Seriously, why haven't you called her out yet? If she's not interested in keeping the family peace for your DH's sake then why are you?

Have dh tell her to eff off

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ignore it. I'm a SAHM of SAC and you have to develop a thick skin and backbone for those comments. People are relentless.

I'm genuinely curious why you need SACC? Not judging!

SAC=school-aged children sorry!

[Anonymous]

You are a big baby. Who cares what she thinks? Make your life choices and stay by them.

[Anonymous]

Here's a crazy thought. Maybe when you stop using her brother as a free meal ticket she'll lighten up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell her to f*ck off! Seriously, why haven't you called her out yet? If she's not interested in keeping the family peace for your DH's sake then why are you?

I have to see this woman for every holiday and family thing. I don't want to completely blow up the relationship.

You don't have to blow up the relationship but you can diminish her presence by not responding to texts. She'll eventually stop using it as a form of communication. You can also unfollow her posts on Facebook and she'll never know.

She's not paying your bills or caring for your family, so you're under no obligation to discuss it with her. If your husband doesn't know she's being such a bitch, it's probably because he's in the long habit of deflecting/ignoring her - which may be why she's poking at you. You don't have to serve her needs by taking it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Here's a crazy thought. Maybe when you stop using her brother as a free meal ticket she'll lighten up.

Oh hello crazy SIL!