Do you know your spouses fantasies?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No and No.

Why are you people so hyper sexed all the time ? You don't have outside hobbies ?

I have plenty of hobbies and when I'm doing them I am thinking about sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not really. I know the basic, vanilla ones of my DW but she hasn't/won't share or doesn't have anything out of the ordinary

This exactly.

-another husband

[Anonymous]

Mine is a clean house, no dirty dishes, and sleeping until 9 am.

[Anonymous]

DW knows some of mine but isn't keen on trying any out. We did role play once it was one of her ideas. I tried my best, but mostly we ended up laughing while acting it out until the sex part came and she enjoyed that. Wish she would tell me more, even if they involve someone else talking about them and trying to act them out together would be enjoyable

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DW knows some of mine but isn't keen on trying any out. We did role play once it was one of her ideas. I tried my best, but mostly we ended up laughing while acting it out until the sex part came and she enjoyed that. Wish she would tell me more, even if they involve someone else talking about them and trying to act them out together would be enjoyable

What are yours?

[Anonymous]

No. I am curious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes and sometimes. I try to fulfill them. He doesn't know mine. He thinks he does and would probably say I'm fulfilled, but he cares so little about what I want, I won't make myself vulnerable by telling him more than he already knows.

+1

[Anonymous]

I've asked a few times. The responses I've gotten have been well.... I like things, with no details or even hints what "things" might be.

I've tried to figure out what she likes and dislikes and after almost 9 years all I have is a list of don't likes that keeps changing. I'm at the point of just marking sex in general on the do not like list.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes and sometimes. I try to fulfill them. He doesn't know mine. He thinks he does and would probably say I'm fulfilled, but he cares so little about what I want, I won't make myself vulnerable by telling him more than he already knows.

+1

Good sounds like a rock solid relationship.

[Anonymous]

No and I have no desire to, nor do I wish to share my own. I am a big believer in the idea that fantasies work better when kept private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mine is a clean house, no dirty dishes, and sleeping until 9 am.

Haha. This would be my wife's fantasy as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes and sometimes. I try to fulfill them. He doesn't know mine. He thinks he does and would probably say I'm fulfilled, but he cares so little about what I want, I won't make myself vulnerable by telling him more than he already knows.

+1

Good sounds like a rock solid relationship.

Why are people coming down negatively on spouses who aren't comfortable sharing (but fulfill their partner's fantasy), but not on spouses who say they have no interest in what their partner wants? This place is bizarre.

[Anonymous]

I know all of my wife's, and they're all size 7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Trust me, you don't. The really weird shit stays inside.

Good!

LOL yeah if DW could read my mind, I'd be toast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you know your spouses fantasies? Do you care what they are?

No, I don't - I wish I did. She says she doesn't have any, but I'm not actually sure I believe her. I do think she's pretty vanilla generally so no, I haven't shared my freakier fantasies - the fulfilled or unfulfilled versions. I'm not sure she could handle it, and I see no reason to make myself vulnerable that way to someone who wouldn't understand or isn't willing to share either. No, this isn't the best dynamic, but we do really well on a lot of other things, and in some ways, it's better for people to have their private space and to get to present the face they know their partner wants to see.