Are you friends with military families?

[Anonymous]

If they aren't all hung-up on rank.

Our neighborhood military are officers and depending on the particular families currently residing, there's a pecking order.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Officer families - yes, enlisted families - no.

Snob!!

My husband is a DoD employee and we are currently overseas. It's been my first full-scale exposure to military life and I've made friends with plenty of military families. That said, it's not really my cup of tea - the culture and mentality - and while it's been nice I don't see myself seeking out relationships with military families once back in the states.

[Anonymous]

No. I've found every military person I've met insufferable and we don't share the same values.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Officer families - yes, enlisted families - no.

My dad is a retired three star General. My DH left the Army as a full Colonel to join the Feds. I am so thankful my dad raised us not to view our enlisted and NCO service members as "less than". I spent most of my adult life taking care of our youngest military families. Our young enlisted troops are the ones doing the really hard work. They are tomorrow's leaders. Our NCOs are leaders who spend their days training and developing enlisted AND young officers. If you have chosen to eliminate them as possible friends, I assure you - You are the one missing out.

[Anonymous]

Of course we are friends with military families.

DH was a military physician. We felt very welcomed when we moved to VA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Officer families - yes, enlisted families - no.

My dad is a retired three star General. My DH left the Army as a full Colonel to join the Feds. I am so thankful my dad raised us not to view our enlisted and NCO service members as "less than". I spent most of my adult life taking care of our youngest military families. Our young enlisted troops are the ones doing the really hard work. They are tomorrow's leaders. Our NCOs are leaders who spend their days training and developing enlisted AND young officers. If you have chosen to eliminate them as possible friends, I assure you - You are the one missing out.

If your dad was a General, you were not hanging out, outside school with enlisted families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If they aren't all hung-up on rank.

Our neighborhood military are officers and depending on the particular families currently residing, there's a pecking order.

Very much a pecking order. When I was dating my husband, who was a higher ranking enlisted at the time, I went to a picnic with him. He left me for a minute and a bunch of the officer's wife came over to say hello. What should have been friendly, was a lecture about how I should marry him so I can use his benefits to get my education. They were rambling on and on about how its too bad enlisted wives are not educated and more. Finally when they let me speak I told them I did have a master's and had no interest in going back to school. The irony is he did what they said and got his education in a field that was well paying and is now doing better than their husband's who had random degrees in nothing.

[Anonymous]

So I would say that there is something to this, but it isn't typically a make or break type thing with friendships.

We have several military families in our neighborhood. We socialize with all of them, are friendly with all of them, but they tend to be somewhat insular, in that when one spouse deploys, they pretty much refuse help from non-mil families - the other mil families feel like they have an obligation to help each other out but it is a strange dynamic where they don't want help from non-mil families.

Also, the pecking order thing can be off-putting. My brother in law is military, and when he goes to certain people's houses for drinks or dinner, if it is a more senior officer, he has to dress up more, has to behave a certain way, has to greet people in the right order, etc.

Dude, I get it if you are at work. But on the weekends and at parties? We live in America.

[Anonymous]

I tried but it didn't work because their children were aggresive and used violence when my child interacted with them. Their parents didn't bother to stop them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I tried but it didn't work because their children were aggresive and used violence when my child interacted with them. Their parents didn't bother to stop them.

All children of military are issued mini-Glocks at birth and are trained killing machines. None of us are liberal, intellectual, or peace-loving people, as none of our parents joined for the educational and travel opportunities open to military.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I tried but it didn't work because their children were aggresive and used violence when my child interacted with them. Their parents didn't bother to stop them.

All children of military are issued mini-Glocks at birth and are trained killing machines. None of us are liberal, intellectual, or peace-loving people, as none of our parents joined for the educational and travel opportunities open to military.

?! This entire thread is a little bizarre. The generalizations are so funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I tried but it didn't work because their children were aggresive and used violence when my child interacted with them. Their parents didn't bother to stop them.

That has nothing to do with military, that has to do with parenting. Funny, the military families we know all have well behaved kids and the terrors are all non-military families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I tried but it didn't work because their children were aggresive and used violence when my child interacted with them. Their parents didn't bother to stop them.

All children of military are issued mini-Glocks at birth and are trained killing machines. None of us are liberal, intellectual, or peace-loving people, as none of our parents joined for the educational and travel opportunities open to military.

?! This entire thread is a little bizarre. The generalizations are so funny.

That was the point. I thought it was funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So I would say that there is something to this, but it isn't typically a make or break type thing with friendships.

We have several military families in our neighborhood. We socialize with all of them, are friendly with all of them, but they tend to be somewhat insular, in that when one spouse deploys, they pretty much refuse help from non-mil families - the other mil families feel like they have an obligation to help each other out but it is a strange dynamic where they don't want help from non-mil families.

Also, the pecking order thing can be off-putting. My brother in law is military, and when he goes to certain people's houses for drinks or dinner, if it is a more senior officer, he has to dress up more, has to behave a certain way, has to greet people in the right order, etc.

Dude, I get it if you are at work. But on the weekends and at parties? We live in America.

That is a bit different from the pecking order. Yes, on duty or off, there is a specific way to address people. (I refused to do it and you have to watch how its done as you can really tell who is respected, who is not and all the dynamics. It was pretty funny when my husband would do it to people he didn't respect as his tone and way was very different than those he respected).

[Anonymous]

We just made some new friends and they are both military.