If you're a mom and you have a mom, does she give you a card on Mother's Day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL gives me a card and it drives me nuts. She writes in it as if it's from DD. She has boundary issues.

Blech.

[Anonymous]

Never got a card from my Mom, never had her wish me Happy Mother's Day. I don't think it dawns on her that I celebrate Mother's Day with my kids. She does live out of state and when I called her today, made a big deal about how my (childless) sister visited her for Mother's Day, and how she kept hoping that I was going to fly down and surprise her, and was watching all day for me to make my surprise appearance from 400 miles away. (I did send flowers and a card and call her. This does not count) She has pulled this passive aggressive sh@t for the last 14 years since I had my first DC. Ummm, no. I'm going to spend Mother's Day with my kids while they are living at home. She does not get this concept.

Welcome to being the child of a raging narcissist.

[Anonymous]

Got a card the year DS was born, nothing since then.

[Anonymous]

My parents sent me a card and flowers when I had a newborn. I would not expect this at any other time.

[Anonymous]

Yes. From Mom and MIL, I am the mother of their grandchildren.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. From Mom and MIL, I am the mother of their grandchildren.

+1

[Anonymous]

I am always jealous of people whose moms do that! My mom, besides never sending me a card for Mother's Day, also has forgotten the dates of my wedding anniversary and the anniversary of the date of my son's adoption. On the other hand, my husband is good about holidays. It hurts though that my mom is so forgetful.

[Anonymous]

Yes, every year. A card with some sort of sentiment about the joy of watching me be a mom and then some sort of gift. I do the same for her and the kids make her cards. MIL is deceased.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am always jealous of people whose moms do that! My mom, besides never sending me a card for Mother's Day, also has forgotten the dates of my wedding anniversary and the anniversary of the date of my son's adoption. On the other hand, my husband is good about holidays. It hurts though that my mom is so forgetful.

If she does celebrate your birthday and your son's birthday, let it go. All these other dates are "extra credit."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a day for you to honor your mom, and your kids to honor you.

Some people acknowledge other mothers in their life, and that's fine, but that's not how everyone does it. Most people acknowledge their own mothers, and that's it.

OP, you kind of are the tween who asked, "But why don't we have a KIDS Day?!"

+1

My 6 year old asked this same question yesterday.

[Anonymous]

Yep, my mom got little gifts for me and my sister. And we sat around and drank some wine and told mom stories

[Anonymous]

op, I feel the way you do, but amplified. My mom and I compete for martyr points, and currently, I'm ahead in that race. She has a life of leisure and entertainment, I work FT and have 3 dcs including one with SN. When my ds was in the hospital for 4 months a couple of years ago, my relationship with my mom broke down. But still she sees herself as this incredibly hard working mom. No, she did not send me a card.

[Anonymous]

OP, and some PPs, take a deep breath...

ONLY YOUR KIDS NEED TO HONOR YOU ON MOTHER'S DAY. Really. That's it. If your children are very small, then your husband/wife/partner can help them honor you (or someone else like a grandparent or nanny if there's no significant other in the picture).

You honor your mother on Mother's Day! Presumably, she "honored" you already by raising you and supporting you in many ways through the years. Is it so hard for ONE DAY to be about someone else, and not about you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, never from MIL though.

I have the opposite situation -- MIL always gives me a card and my own mom never does. I have a great relationship with my mom, it just doesn't occur to her.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Card from mom and MIL.