Bday parties where no "food" is served

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
How is 430-630 not mealtime?

If you eat dinner at 6:30 or later!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
1. Etiquette says you should not expect free food, except the tradition of cake (and candles and Happy Birthday song) at birthday parties.

2. At children's parties, parents should not expect food for themselves.

3. If the birthday party spans lunch or dinner, the host or hostess should provide something more substantial than cake, but again, you cannot expect it.

4. Be aware that some cultures have meals at completely different times. For example, in our country, lunch starts at 1pm and dinner at 7 or 8 pm. In Spain, it's even later. Since I've been here awhile, I know American children have lunch around noon and dinner perhaps around 6. But others may not know this.

In every culture the guests are provided with food and drinks, regardless of the time. Only in this affluent country, I have seen lack of hospitality.

I'm the poster you replied to, and my experience has been different. I have lived in various Western European countries, been to many birthday parties, and much LESS food is served! Cake in the afternoon, juice, fruit and that's it. There isn't this culture of having birthday parties at venues, pizza at all hours, etc. Food at all hours is why Americans have a problem with weight, party or no party, especially given that kids' parties occur every weekend!

Please check the OP again. OP said food beyond cake (and presumably some kind of drink). While most of us, myself included, like to provide a little something extra, this is not a requirement.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm with you...I think food should be served. Doesn't need to be fancy...pizza is sufficient. But if it hovers near a meal time there should be something, unless notice is given: "Cake and juice served"... At least this gives people a heads up. That being said, I have only been to one recent party where food wasn't served. Usually people have plenty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
How is 430-630 not mealtime?

If you eat dinner at 6:30 or later!

Weird, that would be a late dinner for us.
If the party ends at 630, most kids would be starving when they get home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
How is 430-630 not mealtime?

If you eat dinner at 6:30 or later!

Weird, that would be a late dinner for us.
If the party ends at 630, most kids would be starving when they get home.

Most kids I know attend aftercare and are getting picked up at 5:30 or 6:00. So, dinner's on the table at 6:30, quarter to 7:00.

Waiting until 6:30 with an extra snack like cake, would not be a problem for those kids.

If it's a problem for your kid, throw some peanut butter crackers in your purse. Then you're good!

[Anonymous]

OP where do you live? I've been to dozens and dozens of kids birthday parties and there is always food served (usually pizza, sometimes more elaborate), and always enough for the parents too.

[Anonymous]

I agree with OP. It's rude. Provide something and make sure there's enough for the amount of people that you decided to invite.

[Anonymous]

I agree with you, OP. I always provide food for children and adults, and I get annoyed when people stuff my kids full of sugar right before lunch or dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
1. Etiquette says you should not expect free food, except the tradition of cake (and candles and Happy Birthday song) at birthday parties.

2. At children's parties, parents should not expect food for themselves.

3. If the birthday party spans lunch or dinner, the host or hostess should provide something more substantial than cake, but again, you cannot expect it.

4. Be aware that some cultures have meals at completely different times. For example, in our country, lunch starts at 1pm and dinner at 7 or 8 pm. In Spain, it's even later. Since I've been here awhile, I know American children have lunch around noon and dinner perhaps around 6. But others may not know this.

I've never once thrown a birthday party without feeding the kids snack and a meal and also the parents.
It's how polite people do things. If pizza is too pricey for your wallet make some sandwiches but serve something.

[Anonymous]

Bouncy house + lots of food = ?
Maybe they were looking to do preemptive damage control.

[Anonymous]

My kids are in elementary so it isnt a big deal to stop by to get food or if kids are hungry and have a late dinner.

When kids were toddlers and in preschool, i also thought it was odd and rude not to serve food. I posted a similar thread a few years ago. Summary of my thread was only middle class Americans thought it was acceptable to not serve guests food and not consider parents guests to feed even though their children were too young to be dropped off.

We serve food to everyone. So rude to sens guests home hungry from a party. Only acceptable time to not serve a meal is 2-430.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
1. Etiquette says you should not expect free food, except the tradition of cake (and candles and Happy Birthday song) at birthday parties.

2. At children's parties, parents should not expect food for themselves.

3. If the birthday party spans lunch or dinner, the host or hostess should provide something more substantial than cake, but again, you cannot expect it.

4. Be aware that some cultures have meals at completely different times. For example, in our country, lunch starts at 1pm and dinner at 7 or 8 pm. In Spain, it's even later. Since I've been here awhile, I know American children have lunch around noon and dinner perhaps around 6. But others may not know this.

I fully agree with this!

So let me get this straight op... I am inviting Larlo to a party and j am expected to provide a full meal for Larlo, Larla, Larlo #2, you and your husband plus goody bags for all three? I can not afford to host my sons entire preschool class plus all the siblings plus meals for all and all of the parents. I want to have a simple party with cake and maybe a pizza for the kids celebrating the birthday. What is wrong with this or what do you suggest I do?

[Anonymous]

Agree that not having food for all your guests (includes parents) is really rude. Even if it is not main meal time, having fruit, veggies, pretzels or something like that is just part of being a polite host.

4:30-6:30 is prime supper time at my house. Starting dinner at 6:30 is for us really late and kids would only be ok with that if I had known ahead of time there was no food so I could feed them a heavy snack at 4.

On the other hand we do not do while class parties. Kids invite roughly their age plus one or two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am amazed how many times my child gets invited to a bday party at a mealtime (10:30 to 12:30) or (4:30 to 6:30) but no real food is served. Only cake, fruit and in one particularly egregious case, candy. At one birthday party, there was just one cheese pizza for about 10 kids who has been in a bounce house for about an hour. Nothing for the parents (it was not a drop off party).

I don't live around people who can't afford to do more, they choose not to, or maybe food is just not their priority. But to me having guests leave a party hungry is just odd.

Those are not meal times to me. Well, the beginnings of meal times, 12:30 and 6:30, but that's what the fruit is for. I do think it's strange to get one pizza for 10 kids and to not have any snacks (veggies, at least) for the adults. That said, I usually have enough to feed an army but I don't get upset if my hosts don't do the same.

When kids eat sweet stuff at beginnings of mealtimes, they usually don't eat lunch. Well, the cake becomes their lunch.

Maybe posters like this one have little kids but honestly, this just doesn't matter. So your kid eats cake and then doesn't eat one meal. This is not a big deal and you will see that as they get older.

[Anonymous]

It seems like we've been to a million birthdays by now and I can't remember one without hot food. There is usually pizza and sometimes much more if it is at a house. I think parents go overboard. Almost every at home party has had alcohol for the adults. It's nice, but parties have become complex and are no longer a simple get together for kids to play. That's another thread. We have always had ours at a venue with pizza for everyone, drinks, and whatever cake/cupcake/desserts and sides our children picked for that year.