How do you move on after a fight?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a good friend who ended up divorcing her husband. She called me more then a few times in tears and angry because her husband refused to change. It had been that way for 10 years. He had grown kids, and let them have their kids bday parties at their house without consulting my friend. She didn't want kids and all that at her house. The stupid daughter could do it at her place. Horrible grown kids, and one he always gave money to. Paid her divorce lawyer behind my friends back. Lot's of stuff like that.

I could only tell her what I would do. Call the daughter myself and tell her NO. Make plans that day and let the husband entertain them. I also told my friend to sock money away he couldn't find since there were problems.

I guess after so many years the resentments piled on so she did leave him, but for another guy which shocked everyone. While married she set her profile pic on FB to her and her boyfriend. Yes while living with her husband...omg! So all his family saw it since she was their FB friend. Of course there were more photos of them together. She had a LOT of animosity, or enjoyed the payback to all of them.

If you keep doing something your partner is upset about it will eventually blow up in some way.

I know this is off-topic, but your friend sounds horrible! Even without that awful FB thing. I wish that I had a second husband who had the nerve to tell me that I couldn't host my grandchild's birthday party at our house or who had a problem with me helping my kids. They are better off without her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You still need to be detailed. Some fights aren't worth a sit down to discuss. You just move on. Some require a sit down after a few days of cooling off

he always wants to just act like nothing happened once we make up. But this is something I really want to discuss and make sure doesn't happen again, especially the lying.

It's how he is deflecting away from his bad behavior, and get's out of changing it. So far it's worked. Next time call him on it, with the discussion and how you both will resolve this lying problem. No making up until that is out of the way.

[Anonymous]

Healing Hug. We actually say the words, let's have a healing hug and we have a really long hug. Usually any discussion of the problem would be saved for another time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a good friend who ended up divorcing her husband. She called me more then a few times in tears and angry because her husband refused to change. It had been that way for 10 years. He had grown kids, and let them have their kids bday parties at their house without consulting my friend. She didn't want kids and all that at her house. The stupid daughter could do it at her place. Horrible grown kids, and one he always gave money to. Paid her divorce lawyer behind my friends back. Lot's of stuff like that.

I could only tell her what I would do. Call the daughter myself and tell her NO. Make plans that day and let the husband entertain them. I also told my friend to sock money away he couldn't find since there were problems.

I guess after so many years the resentments piled on so she did leave him, but for another guy which shocked everyone. While married she set her profile pic on FB to her and her boyfriend. Yes while living with her husband...omg! So all his family saw it since she was their FB friend. Of course there were more photos of them together. She had a LOT of animosity, or enjoyed the payback to all of them.

If you keep doing something your partner is upset about it will eventually blow up in some way.

I know this is off-topic, but your friend sounds horrible! Even without that awful FB thing. I wish that I had a second husband who had the nerve to tell me that I couldn't host my grandchild's birthday party at our house or who had a problem with me helping my kids. They are better off without her.

You don't plan parties at your house without first seeing if your spouse is ok with it. The leech daughter was too lazy to have it at her house, so was ok with all the wild kids messing up someone else's. And of course she didn't watch her kids well. Mind you this was a yearly problem with birthdays, Christmas, etc. You don't pay for your child's DIVORCE lawyer who is in their late 30's. Are you kidding me? Giving them large amounts of money when they need it so they can hopefully retire someday. He also, moved his grown son and dil in WITHOUT asking my friend because they were having their new house built. I guess they didn't want to pay rent somewhere.

Seriously all the stuff she told me was horrible, and disrespectful. The FB thing was too much, but from everything I know I can understand it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Healing Hug. We actually say the words, let's have a healing hug and we have a really long hug. Usually any discussion of the problem would be saved for another time.

That's funny. Most fights are usually over stupid things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a good friend who ended up divorcing her husband. She called me more then a few times in tears and angry because her husband refused to change. It had been that way for 10 years. He had grown kids, and let them have their kids bday parties at their house without consulting my friend. She didn't want kids and all that at her house. The stupid daughter could do it at her place. Horrible grown kids, and one he always gave money to. Paid her divorce lawyer behind my friends back. Lot's of stuff like that.

I could only tell her what I would do. Call the daughter myself and tell her NO. Make plans that day and let the husband entertain them. I also told my friend to sock money away he couldn't find since there were problems.

I guess after so many years the resentments piled on so she did leave him, but for another guy which shocked everyone. While married she set her profile pic on FB to her and her boyfriend. Yes while living with her husband...omg! So all his family saw it since she was their FB friend. Of course there were more photos of them together. She had a LOT of animosity, or enjoyed the payback to all of them.

If you keep doing something your partner is upset about it will eventually blow up in some way.

I know this is off-topic, but your friend sounds horrible! Even without that awful FB thing. I wish that I had a second husband who had the nerve to tell me that I couldn't host my grandchild's birthday party at our house or who had a problem with me helping my kids. They are better off without her.

You didn't read. He would make plans to have the party without ever asking his wife. The daughter had her own house and should have had her kids party there or somewhere else. Chucky Cheeses?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a good friend who ended up divorcing her husband. She called me more then a few times in tears and angry because her husband refused to change. It had been that way for 10 years. He had grown kids, and let them have their kids bday parties at their house without consulting my friend. She didn't want kids and all that at her house. The stupid daughter could do it at her place. Horrible grown kids, and one he always gave money to. Paid her divorce lawyer behind my friends back. Lot's of stuff like that.

I could only tell her what I would do. Call the daughter myself and tell her NO. Make plans that day and let the husband entertain them. I also told my friend to sock money away he couldn't find since there were problems.

I guess after so many years the resentments piled on so she did leave him, but for another guy which shocked everyone. While married she set her profile pic on FB to her and her boyfriend. Yes while living with her husband...omg! So all his family saw it since she was their FB friend. Of course there were more photos of them together. She had a LOT of animosity, or enjoyed the payback to all of them.

If you keep doing something your partner is upset about it will eventually blow up in some way.

I know this is off-topic, but your friend sounds horrible! Even without that awful FB thing. I wish that I had a second husband who had the nerve to tell me that I couldn't host my grandchild's birthday party at our house or who had a problem with me helping my kids. They are better off without her.

Let's see what you do when your 2nd husband moves creepy uncle Ted in without consulting you.

[Anonymous]

I usually apologize, even if I wasn't really wrong, and then he does the same (sometimes he goes first). I tell him I love him and I give him a hug.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our fights normally end with one of us squeezing the other's hand. Or hugging.

Lame I know. We aren't even a touchy/feely couple, but this is just always how ours end. One of us decides to be the bigger person and leans in for the hug first.

Does makeup sex work??

For me, yes. It is an instant healer, assuming its a routine argument and not something really major. But, yes, I am a man.

[Anonymous]

Sex.