Do your spouses tell you about/invite you to work functions like Christmas party?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on so many things! Industry mostly I think.

I was shocked recently to find out that my girlfriend wasn't invited to her husband's work holiday party (company not paying for spouses, apparently). He works at a wildly successful hedge fund full of pretty much all men... they really want to party without spouses at a sausage fest? So odd.

You are so naïve. They want to party with women other than their wives, hello.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have a potluck at work that costs $20 to attend. So yeah I don't attend and spouses aren't welcome.

omg, that is NUTS! How crappy of them! I don't blame you for skipping it, it sounds horrible!

At my job there is a "party" which costs $20 to attend.... spouse can come if I buy a ticket for her.... it is held during lunch mid December... they typically serve Indian food in the conference room.

[Anonymous]

My DH's party is free for him but we have to pay for me to go--I think $80. I skip it. I mean $80 for the party plus another $80 for a babysitter. Um, no, not interested.

[Anonymous]

My work (state government) has a holiday party, but it's during the day and spouses are not invited. I've worked for two different universities in the past (DH still works in higher ed.). At one, the department holiday party was just for people in the department and it was during the day. In his current department, the party is at night and spouses are invited. I think it really just varies.

[Anonymous]

My husband always tells me about them. We attended early on as he worked for a company that had lavish parties and they were lots of fun. We go to some of the picnics and other stuff but stopped as his current company is basically a temp agency and not the co-workers he works with. They are usually in Baltimore or past Baltimore and the family events don't start till 7 (not going to work well with a little one). We got the invitation this year for the holiday. He hasn't mentioned it but I doubt we'll go.

[Anonymous]

We went before we had our first child. The year DC1 was born DH went alone to the formal holiday party. The whole family is welcome at the summer picnic. We haven't been able to find a babysitter this year for the holiday party, so DH is just going to skip it. I'm a little bummed, but there is always next year!

[Anonymous]

Married 25 years. He is a doctor. I went when I was younger. I'm too busy now. He shoots medical talk and it is really not fun.

He understands.

[Anonymous]

My division's party is in Arlington (work in Bethesda/live in Frederick) at 7pm on a weekday.

Throw in a babysitter and the likelihood that my actual co-workers won't be there ... no thanks.

[Anonymous]

DH here. My spouse hates our holiday parties, and never wants to go. And that's OK with me - I go and have a good time with my co-workers without having to introduce DW to everyone a million times, and without her having to make small talk with strangers for a few hours.

[Anonymous]

My company doesn't invite spouses. Cheaper, I guess. We have it in the late afternoon/early evening.

[Anonymous]

If it is a thing where spouses go, of course we go. We have had both situations at varied companies through the years. But to have one where spouses are invited and just not ask you? That's super weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have a potluck at work that costs $20 to attend. So yeah I don't attend and spouses aren't welcome.

You can't be serious. You have to make a dish and pay $20 on top of that to go?

[Anonymous]

Of course I'm invited. Haven't gone to one in years though. They are BORING.

[Anonymous]

Of course.

[Anonymous]

My former law firm used to have the holiday party at a hotel starting around 4 pm, but no guests whatsoever were permitted. No spouses. It was the weirdest thing, and a recipe for disaster. I guess that is one reason why all of the older male partners were divorced. The ban on guests didn't apply to other functions, like the summer boat cruise or Smithsonian events. We could even bring family to the weekly Friday pizza, and I think as well to the daily, evening drinks in the "Garden Room" (Yes, I'm basically giving away the firm name.) I would hope that this foolishness is in the past and that there are smaller parties in house.

I've worked variously for World Bank and IMF for many years, and I'm tired of the blow out parties. We stopped going years ago. Too much of a scrum.