Poor eye contact

Anonymous
I agree with the advice to book an appointment with a developmental pediatrician. Just as much for your peace of mind as anything else. At 18-24 months autism can being to be diagnosed. And the symptoms you describe are things they look for. However, it's way more complexed and nuanced, which is why you or I or any of the other folks here on the magic interwebs can't make that call. Your speech therapist is aware of the warning signs for a little one who is high risk of autism and may very well be seeing some of the same things as you and be deliberately trying to not alarm you unnecessarily. (You should try to get her to play poker for real money, it sounds like you'd take her to the cleaners.)

At this age, even a trained expert, such as a developmental pediatrician or psychologist might not be able to make a solid diagnosis, 20 months is still pretty tiny to be understanding a kid's potential for communication and interpersonal interaction. But they might. They might also be able to pretty confidently rule it out for you. Which is gonna take a load off of your mind. Go ahead and take your little one to someone who can confidently assess the situation so you don't have to keep second guessing.
Anonymous
Will a developmental pediatrician diagnose before the age of 2 for anything? What do they do that is different from a regular pediatrician? If Strong Start suspects something such as autism would they say anything or recommend seeing a developmental ped or do they not say a word for liability reasons?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Will a developmental pediatrician diagnose before the age of 2 for anything? What do they do that is different from a regular pediatrician? If Strong Start suspects something such as autism would they say anything or recommend seeing a developmental ped or do they not say a word for liability reasons?


It depends on how pronounced symptoms are.

A regular pediatrician isn't a an expert in developmental delays; a developmental pediatrician is.

Strong Start or any other early intervention services cannot diagnose your kid and will not; that is not their mandate nor are they qualified to do so.
Anonymous
But would strong start suggest further evaluation if they suspected a developmental delay?
Anonymous
There is a delay that's why theyre involved. You have to call a dev ped, op.
Anonymous
Facts to note:

--The younger you have a child evaluated for autism, the more likely it is to be incorrect.

-- Language delays often look like autism, especially receptive language delays.

-- Autism is a social communication disorder, not a language disorder. When a child with autism's language comes in, they remain autistic. When a child with a language disorder's language improves, the symptoms fade (although anxiety may linger.)

--Eye contact is not a core element of determining autism.

Anonymous
My son at this age responded very well to movement/physical interaction - such as being swung, thrown, tickled. That was the best way we got eye contact out of him. Other good advice we got was to join him in what he's interested in. If he likes unusual toys or things, share in that interest. It helps. My son also had a lack of pointing, sharing interests, speech delays. Lots of other signs. If you wanted to check with an Infant & Toddler Connection they can do an evaluation and see if they see delays. You may have already, but it's completely free and may be a useful benchmark. They come to your home. Assessment includes receptive and spoken language, fine and gross motor skills, social/emotional - and one other thing I can never remember

Anonymous wrote:Thank you all for your responses. The speech therapist was talking to me like she was holding something back and I couldn't get it out of her. She is super sweet but at times says things that get me very upset. Delays though are sensitive topics for all parents I am sure. It is good to read that I am not alone and that his eye contact and his speech can get better. Thank you again.

I've been playing peekaboo until I am blue in the face to work on eye contact. Are there any other games or exercises that you found really helped?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Will a developmental pediatrician diagnose before the age of 2 for anything? What do they do that is different from a regular pediatrician? If Strong Start suspects something such as autism would they say anything or recommend seeing a developmental ped or do they not say a word for liability reasons?


It depends on how pronounced symptoms are.

A regular pediatrician isn't a an expert in developmental delays; a developmental pediatrician is.

Strong Start or any other early intervention services cannot diagnose your kid and will not; that is not their mandate nor are they qualified to do so.


People always bash pediatricians here, but they can and do administer screening tests like the M-chat and see hundreds of typically developing children. A good ped should be the one you turn to first. If you feel like you can't then you should find a new one you trust. This is not to say that you should not take steps like calling Strong Start, but something is wrong if your normal ped is not part of the picture.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP... very true. I have seen improvements since we started speech therapy 3 months ago and I knew it will only get better with time and therapy. I think just was so blown when the eye contact thing was mentioned. I never really thought about it and how it affects communication and speech. It seems so like it is never going to get better some times and it just made me so so sad. And then... I start googling which is horrible.


You know your child best. Eye contact and communication can be closely tied. There is no predicting but I can tell you at that age, my son had no eye contact, didn't respond to his name, could not do one step commands (get your shoes) and so much more. Today the difference is huge. But, it took us year to get there as others have said too. It is so hard, but hang in there. The worst is ages 2-5 in terms of therapy.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Facts to note:

--The younger you have a child evaluated for autism, the more likely it is to be incorrect.

-- Language delays often look like autism, especially receptive language delays.

-- Autism is a social communication disorder, not a language disorder. When a child with autism's language comes in, they remain autistic. When a child with a language disorder's language improves, the symptoms fade (although anxiety may linger.)

--Eye contact is not a core element of determining autism.




+1

When my child was 5, he looked like he had mixed expressive receptive language disorder. As he worked with a speech therapist and his language improved, it became apparent that he had social communication delays, too. He looked MORE autistic after working with an ST, not less. His perservations became more apparent when he could verbalize them. He started stimming, especially when he was talking with people. His lack of theory of mind was apparent when he could express what he was thinking. He was diagnosed with an ASD at age 8.

I think if parents start with speech therapy the root of the problem -- MERLD or ASD or something else -- will become apparent as kids progress.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Thanks PP... very true. I have seen improvements since we started speech therapy 3 months ago and I knew it will only get better with time and therapy. I think just was so blown when the eye contact thing was mentioned. I never really thought about it and how it affects communication and speech. It seems so like it is never going to get better some times and it just made me so so sad. And then... I start googling which is horrible.


Kids with speech problems often have poor eye contact. If processing speech is difficult, they will look away from faces to listen or to talk. It lightens the cognitive load. Instead of analysing faces and verbal speech, they just listen to the speech. It's a coping mechanism. It should improve on its own as your child's speech improves. If it doesn't, your child can be taught how to do it later. It shouldn't be a primary treatment goal at this point.
Anonymous
Anyone who has gone through eye contact issues and speech delay notice that once eye contact and communication improved did your child's behavior? My child is so so wild and I wonder if his lack of ability to communicate causes him to just constantly be on the move and not listen. Please anyone who has been through this tell me they see a behavior change? I'm so tired and just would love 5 minutes where I wasn't chasing my child. It's just so hard.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:No, it does not always mean autism.

No symptom on the "autism checklist" always means autism.

Yes your child has a good chance of catching up. Communication speech delays take time and 20 months is quite young. Please don't despair. So many success stories.


Early intervention is "success." Getting the help a kid needs is "success." An autism diagnosis isn't the end of the world.
Anonymous
Does behavior get better once eye contact is established?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Anyone who has gone through eye contact issues and speech delay notice that once eye contact and communication improved did your child's behavior? My child is so so wild and I wonder if his lack of ability to communicate causes him to just constantly be on the move and not listen. Please anyone who has been through this tell me they see a behavior change? I'm so tired and just would love 5 minutes where I wasn't chasing my child. It's just so hard.


Yes definitely. My son was so wild, and I felt like I was chasing him all day (possibly true). He got so much better after speech therapy. Don't get me wrong, we are still dealing with his fussy ways (things must be just so), and lack of eye contact, but he is quite expressive and verbal now and has gotten much better with eye contact (we have to remind him). We are now working on other issues, and autism is still a possibility, but he's much easier to handle now.
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