Can a cheating husband still be a good parent?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how Hillary Clinton and Jackie O would (or would have) answered this. Just sayin'.

You don't actually think they're role models for motherhood, do you?

PP here. Lord, no! But the OP didn't require any qualifications for motherhood. It is another DCUM exercise in trashing men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how Hillary Clinton and Jackie O would (or would have) answered this. Just sayin'.

You don't actually think they're role models for motherhood, do you?

PP here. Lord, no! But the OP didn't require any qualifications for motherhood. It is another DCUM exercise in trashing men.

I replied with gender neutral language, but the cheater is my relationship was a woman. I interpreted the OP as "Can a cheating spouse still be a good parent?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how Hillary Clinton and Jackie O would (or would have) answered this. Just sayin'.

You don't actually think they're role models for motherhood, do you?

PP here. Lord, no! But the OP didn't require any qualifications for motherhood. It is another DCUM exercise in trashing men.

I replied with gender neutral language, but the cheater is my relationship was a woman. I interpreted the OP as "Can a cheating spouse still be a good parent?"

Understood. Just going by the exact wording on the OP here.

[Anonymous]

Depends whether you think honesty and honor are important qualities in a parent.

[Anonymous]

A good parent? Probably. A perfect parent? No. But there are no perfect parents.

[Anonymous]

Maybe when the kids are too young to realize what is going on, but having a cheating father gave me all kinds of issues, mainly trust issues. I knew my parents had marriage problems even when I was very young but I didn't realize it was cheating until I was in high school. Yes he was a great father as far as supporting me, encouraging me, always attended my activities and recitals, but I grew up in a house full of drama and it was very obvious that my mother was really unhappy to everyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A huge part of being a good parent is being a good role model, and that means treating ones wife/mother of one's children with respect. A DH who cheats on the wife condones deception, lying, and betrayal of vows. If you say that a cheating DH can also be a good dad means asking your children to view the world in an artificially disjointed way. You are asking your kids to close off a part of their heats, which is really sad.

+1

[Anonymous]

Whether the cheater is the wife ir husband there is a character flaw that is not going to get better most likely, so there's that...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe when the kids are too young to realize what is going on, but having a cheating father gave me all kinds of issues, mainly trust issues. I knew my parents had marriage problems even when I was very young but I didn't realize it was cheating until I was in high school. Yes he was a great father as far as supporting me, encouraging me, always attended my activities and recitals, but I grew up in a house full of drama and it was very obvious that my mother was really unhappy to everyone.

+1. On a day to day level, yes. My mom is certainly a great parent in many ways, in other ways not so much. Her cheating has damaged our relationship beyond measure. But really, the underlying problem is that she's crazy, and the cheating and other parenting problems are merely symptoms of her craziness.

[Anonymous]

Being a good parent is about time, attention, stability, love, availability, etc. It has nothing to do with who you are putting your penis in. Your sex life has nothing to do with kids. So long as the parent is taking finances or attention from the kids, it isn't relevant.

It's like asking whether a woman is a good mom if she isn't having regular sex with her husband. Men would be tempted to say yes, but the truth is they aren't related unless either the lack of marital sex or the affair rips up the family home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Someone once said,"The best thing a man can do for his children is to live their mother." men/women who cheat on spouse also cheat on children by robbing them of family time, money, and emotional well-being.

This! Cheating is 100% selfish. No one in the family is benefiting but the cheater. Put your kids first, stop being a coward by cheating and end the marriage in a dignified manner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:History is chock a block full of beloved dads who are/were horrible husbands.

l
Quite true.

Beloved is different from good. I know some adults who worshipped terrible narcissistic fathers while they were growing up, and then paid the emotional price as adults.

What's good?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Being a good parent is about time, attention, stability, love, availability, etc. It has nothing to do with who you are putting your penis in. Your sex life has nothing to do with kids. So long as the parent is taking finances or attention from the kids, it isn't relevant.

It's like asking whether a woman is a good mom if she isn't having regular sex with her husband. Men would be tempted to say yes, but the truth is they aren't related unless either the lack of marital sex or the affair rips up the family home.

Just stay in that affair bubble and keep lying to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone once said,"The best thing a man can do for his children is to live their mother." men/women who cheat on spouse also cheat on children by robbing them of family time, money, and emotional well-being.

This! Cheating is 100% selfish. No one in the family is benefiting but the cheater. Put your kids first, stop being a coward by cheating and end the marriage in a dignified manner.

Ending the marriage does not benefit kids, unless we are talking an abusive situation they are taken out of.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being a good parent is about time, attention, stability, love, availability, etc. It has nothing to do with who you are putting your penis in. Your sex life has nothing to do with kids. So long as the parent is taking finances or attention from the kids, it isn't relevant.

It's like asking whether a woman is a good mom if she isn't having regular sex with her husband. Men would be tempted to say yes, but the truth is they aren't related unless either the lack of marital sex or the affair rips up the family home.

Just stay in that affair bubble and keep lying to yourself.

It had everything to do with me the day I walked in on them. I saw things a 14-year-old should never, ever see.