How do your high schoolers talk to adults? A vent and sincere question

[Anonymous]

Dd is only almost 13, but I point out good customer service and bad to her. She's seen me ask for the manager to single out an employee for good or bad. So hopefully she's learning. I will encourage her to work as a teen and to learn excellent customer service. It's important to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:13:27 back to say that that it is reassuring to hear that I'm not alone in my observations. I feel like I'm waging a one-Mom war sometimes!

The thing that appalls me is the sassiness I see in young children and how they openly challenge, correct and defy adults. I see it with my nieces and nephews, in the classroom, at church activities, coaching - and with my own kids (but at least I can intervene).

Most concerning is the experience of having a young (7-10) year old neighbor kid respond, "why?" when I announce that it is time to help clean up, or go home or move his bike out of the driveway. I was raised that the correct answer in the above situations was, "Yes, Mrs. Smith." Not "really?" or "how come?"

13:27 is right - this comes from having everything explained to you all your life, so now you demand an explanation at the ripe old age of 10 and IF that explanation is worthy, then you'll do whatever is requested. It comes from all these parent saying -- Braden please move you bike bc if you don't I won't be able to back out of the driveway and then I'll be sad, do you want mommy to be sad?? Gag. I'm pretty sure my parents said -- move your bike. If I didn't and it got damaged, oh well; and they were not running to the store the next day to buy a new one. If they decided to get a new one it would have been for a birthday or Christmas and they didn't much care if that was 11 months away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not taught anymore.

I've helped run Girl Scout cookie booths. I'll tell the girls if they want to eat a snack, they need to move away from the table. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla needs a little snack, it's no big deal, she can stay here." I'll tell the girls they need to stand up and present the customer with an attitude of preparedness, rather than be seated and chatting with their friends. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla's tired. We're here for two hours. It's no big deal to sit." I'll tell the girls they can't play under/around the table, if they need a break grab a friend and an adult and go for a little walk. Their parents will contradict me. "No one's buying anything right now, as soon as someone comes up they'll stop."

Why are you telling other people's kids what to do. That's at least as rude as any of the behavior being attributed to kids on this thread.

[Anonymous]

This is an issue I would bring up with a board member at the pool.

[Anonymous]

We just went through applying to private schools for DS. We had to go to events before his admission, and we wanted him to make a good impression. We always have worked on teaching him to make eye contact, don't mumble, smile, extend hand for a firm handshake. Before the events, we practiced these concepts extensively. Now when we go anywhere, he knows how to act.

I also badger him constantly about not walking through a door before me. If he does, I make him turn around and come back and let me go first. This is still a work in process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not taught anymore.

I've helped run Girl Scout cookie booths. I'll tell the girls if they want to eat a snack, they need to move away from the table. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla needs a little snack, it's no big deal, she can stay here." I'll tell the girls they need to stand up and present the customer with an attitude of preparedness, rather than be seated and chatting with their friends. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla's tired. We're here for two hours. It's no big deal to sit." I'll tell the girls they can't play under/around the table, if they need a break grab a friend and an adult and go for a little walk. Their parents will contradict me. "No one's buying anything right now, as soon as someone comes up they'll stop."

Why are you telling other people's kids what to do. That's at least as rude as any of the behavior being attributed to kids on this thread. [/quote
If she's running the booth, it's her job to teach the kids how to sell cookies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is an issue I would bring up with a board member at the pool.

OP here. I might. It's been bad for the last 7 years. But it's neighborhood kids employed by Georgetown Aquatics. Not sure they'd do anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not taught anymore.

I've helped run Girl Scout cookie booths. I'll tell the girls if they want to eat a snack, they need to move away from the table. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla needs a little snack, it's no big deal, she can stay here." I'll tell the girls they need to stand up and present the customer with an attitude of preparedness, rather than be seated and chatting with their friends. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla's tired. We're here for two hours. It's no big deal to sit." I'll tell the girls they can't play under/around the table, if they need a break grab a friend and an adult and go for a little walk. Their parents will contradict me. "No one's buying anything right now, as soon as someone comes up they'll stop."

Why are you telling other people's kids what to do. That's at least as rude as any of the behavior being attributed to kids on this thread.

See -- it's parents like this that excuse kids' behavior under the guise of how DARE you tell MY kid what to do??

I think it used to be more acceptable that all parents could gently correct all kids --without risking a beatdown or a lawsuit or something. PP is instructing kids on how to run a cookie sale table -- don't sit at the table, don't snack right there, don't play under the table. It is precisely what she is supposed to instruct them on as a Girl Scout leader. Yet you act like she's telling the kids to do their homework and make their beds and go to church.

[Anonymous]

Lol...frankly I'm kind of done with most millennals and they are older! And that includes millennial doctors.

[Anonymous]

My son is shy, but he is respectful.

Adults seem to like him, and report back positively, so I think he's doing ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you local? I find that most people who have a customer service role in this area behave that way, regardless of age.

It isn't a teen thing, it is a lack of manners & customer service.

There is very little customer service ability in this country. It's pretty shocking, actually. I worked a lot in the service industry, starting pretty young. And, I'm appalled at how cashiers, servers, and others in the service industry act.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not taught anymore.

I've helped run Girl Scout cookie booths. I'll tell the girls if they want to eat a snack, they need to move away from the table. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla needs a little snack, it's no big deal, she can stay here." I'll tell the girls they need to stand up and present the customer with an attitude of preparedness, rather than be seated and chatting with their friends. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla's tired. We're here for two hours. It's no big deal to sit." I'll tell the girls they can't play under/around the table, if they need a break grab a friend and an adult and go for a little walk. Their parents will contradict me. "No one's buying anything right now, as soon as someone comes up they'll stop."

Why are you telling other people's kids what to do. That's at least as rude as any of the behavior being attributed to kids on this thread.

See -- it's parents like this that excuse kids' behavior under the guise of how DARE you tell MY kid what to do??

I think it used to be more acceptable that all parents could gently correct all kids --without risking a beatdown or a lawsuit or something. PP is instructing kids on how to run a cookie sale table -- don't sit at the table, don't snack right there, don't play under the table. It is precisely what she is supposed to instruct them on as a Girl Scout leader. Yet you act like she's telling the kids to do their homework and make their beds and go to church.

There are actually rules about how the booths have to be run as well as teaching kids to use manners. It's against the rules (at least in my council) to eat at the booth. That's not just my personal opinion that it's rude to eat at the booth. I've had parents not step up and correct their kids' mistakes, but I'm grateful that I've never had any contradict me like pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son is shy, but he is respectful.

Adults seem to like him, and report back positively, so I think he's doing ok.

Did you actively teach him, or did he just kick it up from observing/experience?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not taught anymore.

I've helped run Girl Scout cookie booths. I'll tell the girls if they want to eat a snack, they need to move away from the table. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla needs a little snack, it's no big deal, she can stay here." I'll tell the girls they need to stand up and present the customer with an attitude of preparedness, rather than be seated and chatting with their friends. Their parents will contradict me. "Larla's tired. We're here for two hours. It's no big deal to sit." I'll tell the girls they can't play under/around the table, if they need a break grab a friend and an adult and go for a little walk. Their parents will contradict me. "No one's buying anything right now, as soon as someone comes up they'll stop."

Why are you telling other people's kids what to do. That's at least as rude as any of the behavior being attributed to kids on this thread.

It sounds to me like she is there to supervise the girls while they sell cookies. She's right on all counts in her post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am tired of going to the neighborhood pool, saying hi to the lifeguards at the front desk, and having them totally ignore me. Noses never come out of their phones. Not one word. Last weekend, I asked one lifeguard (who also didn't return my greeting) what their pool hours would be during this first week of school, and she said, "it's back there on the board."

When I was a teen, I would always greet a customer. And I would have told them both what the hours were as well as that the hours are posted on the board. Or I'd say, " I'm afraid I forgot. They are written over here. Let me check."

Kids these days, eh? We didn't behave like that when I was young!

-every generation, ever