Is it wrong to be slightly offput about this?

[Anonymous]

You're totally overthinking. You sound immature - in the way that kids think they are the center of their parents lives.

[Anonymous]

Do you bring all of your out of town guest over to meet your mom? Seriously, op, this is self-centered.

[Anonymous]

OP, I don't think it's a big deal or anything but, like you, I think I'd be ever so slightly off put by it. In fact, I was in a similar situation last month when my family was visiting my ILs and their friends didn't come by to see us even though they live around the corner and have been good friends of the family for years and we know them pretty well. But apparently, according to my ILs, they didn't come by because they "don't like kids" so maybe that's your mom's friend's reason too and your mom knew it and didn't want to tell you that because she assumed (correctly, I would say based on your sensitivity to this!) that you'd be offended. Anyway, just wanted to say I understand and would feel similarly.

[Anonymous]

Do you bring all of your out of town guest over to meet your mom? Seriously, op, this is self-centered.

Yes, if I had a good friend staying with me for a week, I would definitely bring them to meet my mom, of course. I would want them to get to know her a bit and vice versa.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I must be in the minority because I'd actually want to meet my friends grandkids, especially if I had met the kid at some point in the past. I think it's weird that someone would care about her friend but not her friends family, even enough to say hi. Honestly, I'd find it strange not to go out to lunch together. But,maybe the friend hates kids or something.

This is dumb

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are being silly. Why would your mom and her friend feel the need to come say hi? Why would you think she wants to spend time meeting your kid?

I love my kids, and I sometimes enjoy meeting my friends kids. But I really can't imagine being super motivated to meet my friend's kid's kid.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, if I had a good friend staying with me for a week, I would definitely bring them to meet my mom, of course. I would want them to get to know her a bit and vice versa.

I find this a bit weird, but if that is the way you operate, I can see why you feel upset. Maybe your mother just doesn't have the same mindset regarding friends and family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Do you bring all of your out of town guest over to meet your mom? Seriously, op, this is self-centered.

Yes, if I had a good friend staying with me for a week, I would definitely bring them to meet my mom, of course. I would want them to get to know her a bit and vice versa.

Perhaps it is time to cut the umbilical cord.

[Anonymous]

I have limited free time. If I was visiting a friend from college, I would have zero interest in spending time with their child and grandchild. I don't particularly like little kids and never have so I completely understand people who do not want to spend time with kids now.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they're having an affair.

[Anonymous]

Possible scenarios:
1. She wants to hang out with her friend, be ridiculous and reminisce about times when they weren't anyone's mother or grandmother
2. Friend had a terrible time with fertility, as still not come to grips with it, and seeing you and your baby only represents the life she'll never have
3. Friend has absolutely no interest in you or your baby
4. They have a bunch of day trips planned and intend to not have to entertain anyone else but each other
5. Friend has terminal disease and the week will be spent making end of life decisions.
6. Your mom gapped it because she is so darned exciting about seeing a long time friend that she has had since some of her more formative years

OP, I think it's sweet that your mom raised you thinking you're the most important in the world to her,and that you believed it. But really..let her have a life of her own. You obviously have not seen this friend in like 10 years, so you should not be so emotionally attached to her that not seeing her to show off presents a drastic crisis in your life. Go bowling or something.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think it's sweet that your mom raised you thinking you're the most important in the world to her,and that you believed it. But really..let her have a life of her own.

I don't think that at all. My mom is a a lot of fun to be around, and has met all of my closer friends. I invite her to things that I do with my friends sometimes, because she gets along with people well, and has something to talk about with almost everyone. If I had a friend from college in town for a week, I'd take them to meet her. But maybe she had some reason she didn't want to (wanting to focus on old times, friend wasn't interested).

[Anonymous]

I can think of a couple of my mom's friends who I would like to see and might like to see me. I don't think it's anything to be put off about, though.

[Anonymous]

Why would you be put off? You don't have a relationship with this person and she probably has no interest in meeting your DC. And that's fine. You're an adult. You don't need to be the center of your mom's life.