I am an atheist but agree with the values of some very religious people.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like your world view is actually very similar to that of the Jains. They are vegetarian, generally socially conservative (at least traditional Jains are), and do not believe in "God" the way Christians understand it, though many Jains are deeply spiritual. I agree with other posters that you should educate yourself about religion - there are many different religions that encompass many different world views.
I think you should let your children go to temple, or church, or whatever with your husband. It is incredibly limiting that you were raised to be frightened of religious people. How would you feel if religious people were frightened of you and your children? "Fearing" people who are religious IS bigotry. In Europe, children used to be taught to fear the Jews for their supposed misdeeds. Its a problem. At the very least, your children should learn to accept and not fear people of faith.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also. Just for the sake of asking ... if he hasn't gone in 40 years, and if he's not likely to be particularly involved or committed, what would happen if you just said "okay, make it happen" and then waited a month ... ? How often would they actually go?

This is interesting. It would probably end up as a field trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also. Just for the sake of asking ... if he hasn't gone in 40 years, and if he's not likely to be particularly involved or committed, what would happen if you just said "okay, make it happen" and then waited a month ... ? How often would they actually go?

This is interesting. It would probably end up as a field trip.

good way to think of it.

I agree with many other posters who are concerned about your preconceived ideas about "religion." It's not a monolith and there's no reason why your children would immediately get sucked in to something negative. It could be like taking them to a country or an ethnic neighborhood they know nothing about -- new sights and sounds and tastes. Religion is something I think everyone should know about as a part of our culture -- but that's different from forcing belief in a particular form of it.

If DH hasn't been in 40years -- he may well be in for a shock in terms of how things have changed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also. Just for the sake of asking ... if he hasn't gone in 40 years, and if he's not likely to be particularly involved or committed, what would happen if you just said "okay, make it happen" and then waited a month ... ? How often would they actually go?

This is interesting. It would probably end up as a field trip.

I think it would probably end up as not going.
If it did happen, I think that you should go along, just so you understand what they're experiencing. It's probably not nearly as big of a deal as you were raised to believe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, how would you feel if your children ended up as adults who practice a religion? Do you think there are good people who practice religion -- and if your children ended up practicing, how would you raise them to be a practitioner who also kept your values?

I wouldn't judge them, I would just wonder why they believed in god.
I would want them to have my values, but if they found a religion that shared my values, it would likely be a conservative religion, which to me is concerning. I don't want orthodox Jewish, Mormon, or ultra conservative Muslim kids....just don't.

[Anonymous]

There's only thing that matters in all of this, OP: What do you think happens to us when we die?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There's only thing that matters in all of this, OP: What do you think happens to us when we die?

To an atheist, it's not so much what we believe as a matter of faith, but what's been shown to happen. Which is to say, nothing happens to us when we die. Our brains stop functioning, our bodies decompose. Our friends and family remember us for some time, but 2-3 generations later, no one living would know we ever existed. We are merely insignificant links in a biological chain.

Now, that is what we logically understand will happen as a matter of fact. As to how that make us feel, that depends on the person. Some become scared, some find this as an indication to treasure life even more. It depends on the person, but I would say the most natural initial response, especially for people with no kids, is a profound feeling of sadness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's only thing that matters in all of this, OP: What do you think happens to us when we die?

To an atheist, it's not so much what we believe as a matter of faith, but what's been shown to happen. Which is to say, nothing happens to us when we die. Our brains stop functioning, our bodies decompose. Our friends and family remember us for some time, but 2-3 generations later, no one living would know we ever existed. We are merely insignificant links in a biological chain.

Now, that is what we logically understand will happen as a matter of fact. As to how that make us feel, that depends on the person. Some become scared, some find this as an indication to treasure life even more. It depends on the person, but I would say the most natural initial response, especially for people with no kids, is a profound feeling of sadness.

I'm not sad -- Im happy to be here. We are very Significant links in the biological chain--- none of us would be here if it weren't for the exact people before us.It's huge stroke of luck. As for kids -- memories of them die out after a few generations too and some day the whole universe may burn up. So what - there's nothing we can do about it. But we can enjoy it while were here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I were to ever switch religions, (I'm Catholic), and wanted to maintain much of what you seem to value though with a more universally accepting all approach I'd be taking a hard look at the Episcopalian Church.

Huh? The Episcopal Church is still an Orthodox Christian church, no matter how some of their bishops run off at the mouth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try UU.

I have been told this over and over. They are usually very liberal and that is not me. I really don't wnat to try anything. I want to avoid any institution.

You don't know until you try it. If you are going purely on reputation, you will not find anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try UU.

I have been told this over and over. They are usually very liberal and that is not me. I really don't wnat to try anything. I want to avoid any institution.

You don't know until you try it. If you are going purely on reputation, you will not find anything.

But it's true that UU's are very liberal on social issues - All OP needs to do is check their national website and a few local websites. it's perfectly obvious. Plus she's repeated that she wants to avoid an institution, which the UU is, so stop with the recruitment efforts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I were to ever switch religions, (I'm Catholic), and wanted to maintain much of what you seem to value though with a more universally accepting all approach I'd be taking a hard look at the Episcopalian Church.

Huh? The Episcopal Church is still an Orthodox Christian church, no matter how some of their bishops run off at the mouth.

The Episcopal church is usually very liberal. Some individual Catholic parishes are somewhat liberal too, but everyone knows what the rules are and that they are breaking them. Not so with the Episcopalians, who have fewer rules and less dogmatic beliefs.

I agree with pp - a switch from Catholicism to Episcopalian is a good move and one which many Catholics have made.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's only thing that matters in all of this, OP: What do you think happens to us when we die?

To an atheist, it's not so much what we believe as a matter of faith, but what's been shown to happen. Which is to say, nothing happens to us when we die. Our brains stop functioning, our bodies decompose. Our friends and family remember us for some time, but 2-3 generations later, no one living would know we ever existed. We are merely insignificant links in a biological chain.

Now, that is what we logically understand will happen as a matter of fact. As to how that make us feel, that depends on the person. Some become scared, some find this as an indication to treasure life even more. It depends on the person, but I would say the most natural initial response, especially for people with no kids, is a profound feeling of sadness.

I'm not sad -- Im happy to be here. We are very Significant links in the biological chain--- none of us would be here if it weren't for the exact people before us.It's huge stroke of luck. As for kids -- memories of them die out after a few generations too and some day the whole universe may burn up. So what - there's nothing we can do about it. But we can enjoy it while were here.

Or we can believe in a whole invisible, eternal realm created thousands of years ago by our pre-scientific predecessors and later organized into numerous religious organizations that still exist today with financial support from their followers, and in some cases, reinforced with the threat of eternal damnation if you don't believe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's only thing that matters in all of this, OP: What do you think happens to us when we die?

To an atheist, it's not so much what we believe as a matter of faith, but what's been shown to happen. Which is to say, nothing happens to us when we die. Our brains stop functioning, our bodies decompose. Our friends and family remember us for some time, but 2-3 generations later, no one living would know we ever existed. We are merely insignificant links in a biological chain.

Now, that is what we logically understand will happen as a matter of fact. As to how that make us feel, that depends on the person. Some become scared, some find this as an indication to treasure life even more. It depends on the person, but I would say the most natural initial response, especially for people with no kids, is a profound feeling of sadness.

I'm not sad -- Im happy to be here. We are very Significant links in the biological chain--- none of us would be here if it weren't for the exact people before us.It's huge stroke of luck. As for kids -- memories of them die out after a few generations too and some day the whole universe may burn up. So what - there's nothing we can do about it. But we can enjoy it while were here.

Or we can believe in a whole invisible, eternal realm created thousands of years ago by our pre-scientific predecessors and later organized into numerous religious organizations that still exist today with financial support from their followers, and in some cases, reinforced with the threat of eternal damnation if you don't believe.

yup, live and let live. Anything else?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's only thing that matters in all of this, OP: What do you think happens to us when we die?

To an atheist, it's not so much what we believe as a matter of faith, but what's been shown to happen. Which is to say, nothing happens to us when we die. Our brains stop functioning, our bodies decompose. Our friends and family remember us for some time, but 2-3 generations later, no one living would know we ever existed. We are merely insignificant links in a biological chain.

Now, that is what we logically understand will happen as a matter of fact. As to how that make us feel, that depends on the person. Some become scared, some find this as an indication to treasure life even more. It depends on the person, but I would say the most natural initial response, especially for people with no kids, is a profound feeling of sadness.

I'm not sad -- Im happy to be here. We are very Significant links in the biological chain--- none of us would be here if it weren't for the exact people before us.It's huge stroke of luck. As for kids -- memories of them die out after a few generations too and some day the whole universe may burn up. So what - there's nothing we can do about it. But we can enjoy it while were here.

Or we can believe in a whole invisible, eternal realm created thousands of years ago by our pre-scientific predecessors and later organized into numerous religious organizations that still exist today with financial support from their followers, and in some cases, reinforced with the threat of eternal damnation if you don't believe.

yup, live and let live. Anything else?

Live and let live would entail not forcing small children to believe things for which there is no evidence.