HELP - sibling similarities in IQ?
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Anonymous
| Really? |
Anonymous
Truth be told, second child is my secret favorite. I'm sad FOR HIM that he won't get to be part of the program. He knows about it, wants to take part, and I believe he'd do well. |
Anonymous
| I thought you were talking about DYS, but that's a minimum FSIQ of 145 I believe. |
Anonymous
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I have two sisters, Irish twins (I'm much older). Both seniors in college. One of them is in top 30 school, just got an award for being the top senior in math and science. She is collecting piles of graduate school admission offers and job offers. For the other we thought it was great that she graduated high school, it was kind of a miracle that she was admitted into a college, and while I think she will graduate, her job prospects are unknown... They went through the schools and classes until in high school thy obviously took different classes at the end.
So yes, there is significant difference among siblings in intelligence, measured or not. |
Anonymous
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Your first child must have significantly low processing scores, as my dc has a FSIQ a couple points lower and a higher GAI.
May I assume that your second child has higher processing scores than the first? This child will likely fare better in school and may even "seem" more intelligent in a classroom setting. I understand the second child wants to do what the first child does, but you can likely find a program that is a better fit and better fits his interests. And I really hope you didn't tell either one of them their scores. No good can come from that. |
Anonymous
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The difference in score doesn't seem odd, especially when you consider that the tests aren't perfect. I've heard that siblings are usually within 10 points of IQ of each other, but I've seen plenty of kids that defy that.
It's a shame that he can't go to the school with those scores. My son is in a similar position educationally. Gifted, but not gifted enough (according to scores) to get the kind of education I think he could really benefit from. |
Anonymous
+100 This whole thread makes me sad. |
Anonymous
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Yes, IQ scores can differ quite a bit.
I have one child with IQ of 140 with low processing speed due to ADHD (cannot recall GAI), another child with IQ of 135 and no processing speed issues at all, and a third child with FSIQ of 108 (GAI of 115) with very low processing speed/executive function issues due to severe ADHD. Three kids, same parents, similar pregnancies. |
Anonymous
I'm sorry it makes you sad that I care whether my son can access a great educational program. |
Anonymous
Seriously. It's pretty obvious to everyone else and probably is to the "lesser" child as well. Give it a rest and just enjoy your kids for who they are. |
Anonymous
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FWIW, my sister has a higher IQ than me, but I am far more successful. She also had other issues which result in her not presenting well.
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Anonymous
Please, help me understand how it's "pretty obvious". Are you projecting or something? Did your parents like one of your siblings better than you? Here's the thing: Child 2 is by far the one we think will do well in life. He's socially savvy, athletic, funny, super engaging, and very smart. I am not disappointed in him as a child (which seems to be what you're assuming). I am disappointed that he won't get to join a program that he's been excited about for a long time, and I am disappointed that he won't be able to have that great learning experience. The "lesser" child? Not even close. |
Anonymous
Yes, first child has a huge processing speed deficit. Second child can manage much more easily in the classroom and is very focused whereas first child is not. I have no intention of telling either their scores, but they'll be able to figure out ballpark just based on inclusion in/exclusion from this program, if they ever get savvy enough to look up parameters online (like as high school students; not right now). They are both acutely aware that the program is for the "super smart" kids, so second son will be feeling like he is not smart if he didn't get into the program. He's six, so it's hard to explain that 99th percentile is great. What he internalizes is that he didn't do well enough and isn't smart enough. |
Anonymous
What your child internalizes will be based in large part on what you do and say. Maybe you can help him understand that it's not that he's not smart enough, it's that he didn't score high enough (regardless of how smart he is). There are many things that can contribute to why he didn't score high enough - like not sleeping well or the stress of testing or just having a bad day in general. And yeah it sucks that it happened that way, but sometimes life is like that. My DD2 really wants to get in to AAP. She doesn't understand what it is, she just wants to be at the same school as DD1. She sees how enthusiastic and engaged her sister is and she wants to be a part of that. We've explained to her that a committee has to decide if the AAP center is the right place for her and we worked on "making her file as strong as possible". If she doesn't get in, it will because of her file, not because of her abilities. It's like job hunting - it's not that I'm not good enough for a particular job, it may just be that my resume didn't strike a chord with the recruiter. It's not about what you can or can't do, it's about how you present yourself. Although that may be harder in your case, because it sounds like admission to your program is based on one score. Good luck! |
Anonymous
| It's like the quote "[o]n any given Sunday, any team in the NFL can beat any other team." On any given day, your younger son probably could have scored high enough to get into that program. But on that particular day, he didn't. |