I am becoming suspicious of my boyfriend

[Anonymous]

He sounds incredibly immature. Strippers in bed? Those are called prostitutes.
Even if these things aren't him, it's a reflection of him. Trust your gut and dump him.

[Anonymous]

Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The most worrisome part for me if it is him then that means he had a woman in his apartment. We are exclusive and he would be cheating. I'm very worried to say the least.

I wouldn't necessarily think he's talking about himself. You probably wouldn't be suspicious unless he has given you other reasons to believe he's not trustworthy (unless you are typically jealous or insecure in relationships, which you haven't indicated).

I remember your post a while back about how you were out of town and your BF sent you a text asking you to come over...and it really seemed like he texted you by accident and it was meant for a FWB. That DID seem suspicious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

I didn't understand the part about leaving strippers in the bed to book flights. I mean, they cavort with strippers, I get it, but leaving them to book flights...huh? What am I missing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

I didn't understand the part about leaving strippers in the bed to book flights. I mean, they cavort with strippers, I get it, but leaving them to book flights...huh? What am I missing.

You misread what I said. His " friend" left a stripper in his bed because he had a flight to catch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

I didn't understand the part about leaving strippers in the bed to book flights. I mean, they cavort with strippers, I get it, but leaving them to book flights...huh? What am I missing.

That was the first indication a few weeks back but now with these stories, I think it is him. His friends are all players, cheaters, and manipulators. He has known them since childhood. I really hoped he was different but I guess not. He acts like he is a church boy compared to these men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

Actually, as written, it doesn't. (especially about the woman in the apartment at 2 am). Someone can piece it together and get the gist if they are so inclined, I did, but no, a lot of the writing really isn't clear.

[Anonymous]

If he tells this kind of stuff about his friends, he can't be trusted. Guys trust other guys with these things. They are not cool with running to your GF to repeat.

He is shady. Drop him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

I didn't understand the part about leaving strippers in the bed to book flights. I mean, they cavort with strippers, I get it, but leaving them to book flights...huh? What am I missing.

That was the first indication a few weeks back but now with these stories, I think it is him. His friends are all players, cheaters, and manipulators. He has known them since childhood. I really hoped he was different but I guess not. He acts like he is a church boy compared to these men.

Lots of people hold on to childhood friends because they are childhood friends- not necessarily because they still have so much in common but because of nostalgia. How old are you all? Does he have other friends who aren't so shady as well?

I didn't see your earlier post, but his text asking you to come over when you were out of town almost certainly was not meant for you. Trust your gut, you don't need to build an air tight case to leave someone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my 20s, I dated a guy with friends like that. I'm sure he did some of it, too. He didn't see much wrong with it, either. However, the immature and misogynistic atmosphere of that type of crowd gets old fast. That relationship ended quickly. I got really tired, really fast, of hearing stupid stories of bachelor parties and the such where the groom to be had to sing the Star Spangled Banner into the stripper's vagina and all that.

Yes, OP, you're worrying too much about whether your boyfriend really did these things. The point is that he hangs out with people who do these things and it seems not to bother him. That's the red flag you should be paying attention to instead of worrying about whether he is talking about himself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

I didn't understand the part about leaving strippers in the bed to book flights. I mean, they cavort with strippers, I get it, but leaving them to book flights...huh? What am I missing.

You misread what I said. His " friend" left a stripper in his bed because he had a flight to catch.

NP, but no, you mis-wrote what you intended to convey. You wrote "book" instead of "catch". That, combined with "but swears he doesn't do that" (do what? Have strippers in his bed? Or leave strippers in his bed while he "books" a flight?) created confusion. It was difficult to determine what the example you were trying to convey was supposed to indicate.

That aside, I agree with PPs that this situation seems to call for trusting your gut. It doesn't feel right to you, and that's reason enough to end this relationship. You're not married; you're under no obligation to try to work through your discomfort or determine whether there are truly any bad behaviors on your boyfriend's part.

[Anonymous]

Even if there's nothing going on, he shows extremely poor judgment by telling you this stuff. I'd dump him just for that.

And that text is very suspicious - why on earth would he write that to you knowing you are away?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post doesn't make sense. I'm not going to spend any more time on it.

Clearly you can't read. OPs post makes sense.

I didn't understand the part about leaving strippers in the bed to book flights. I mean, they cavort with strippers, I get it, but leaving them to book flights...huh? What am I missing.

You misread what I said. His " friend" left a stripper in his bed because he had a flight to catch.

(different poster here) Ohhh, I see now. I thought he was getting out of bed to go to his laptop to book a flight on kayak.com and I couldn't understand why he didn't just go back to bed with his stripper. But you meant actually leaving to go to the airport to catch a flight. Makes sense now.

[Anonymous]

Trust your gut OP.

If you want to talk to him be direct. "I have the feeling that many of these things you tell me about your "friends" reflect things you have said or done. And I have a hunch that the "come over and see me" text was sent accidentally to me so you were cheating on me.

I don't think we're a good fit BF - I wish you all the best but I'm done."

Trust that you deserve better and act in your own best interests accordingly OP.