Married foreign wives take kids for summer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leaving your husband alone for three months is not very smart. They might go to Happy Hour and find more than booze to be happy about.

You're projecting again.

[Anonymous]

I know wealthy Americans who do this--go to grandparents huge southern beach house and spend a couple months in the summer; husbands fly in on the weekends to see them and then fly back to work.

[Anonymous]

I would love to do this! I'm American but my husband is foreign-born. I'd love to take my kid to his dad's home country for the summer. But I can't afford not working that long. My husband wouldn't take our son himself for that long, though, and I'd miss my kid too much to let them go without me anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's very common among expat wives as well -- including Americans -- for all of the same reasons listed. We were planning to move to the ME and part of the deal was that the kids and I came home for the summer to see family and friends and also to GTFO of the extreme heat.

No kidding. This place is a sauna.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know wealthy Americans who do this--go to grandparents huge southern beach house and spend a couple months in the summer; husbands fly in on the weekends to see them and then fly back to work.

Who in their right mind flies *south* for the summer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a few male acquaintances who have wives from Europe (some of the males are too, but not all). It seems that many (not all) of these European wives take their children to their hometowns for the summer, effectively leaving the husband for 3 months or so and living with their parents. I have also met a woman from Jordan who does this as well. They are all still married to their husbands. I haven't met Americans who do this.

Just wondering if this is a common occurrence to foreign women. Not trying to be judgmental, just curious about the reasons people would make this choice.

I am from Europe and I take my kids 5 weeks there every summer (I telework for half of the time). the reasons: only time I see my family and friends, kids get to spend 5 weeks split between Alps and mediterranean beaches instead of in hot and humid DC
in a $$$$$$ summer camp, they can practice my language, at about $4500 for three tickets, the airfare is so high that going for two weeks (and then having to add the summer camp in DC for the remaining time) would not be worthwhile.

one thing you get wrong is that this is not common for Americans. my former boss in Italy is married to an American and every year she takes the kids to the US for at least two months (schools in Italy start in mid September). in my hometown there are a lot of American expats and it is common for the non working wives to go back to the US in the summer. you just don't see it because you do not live abroad

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know wealthy Americans who do this--go to grandparents huge southern beach house and spend a couple months in the summer; husbands fly in on the weekends to see them and then fly back to work.

You have some very rich friends! I don't know anyone who lives this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Probably some or all of the following:

1 - they don't get to see their families much since they live overseas;

2 - it takes a long time (comparatively) to get overseas so you might as well stay for while when you get there;

3 - the grandparents/relatives like to spend time with the children;

4 - they want their children to experience life in a country/culture other than the US, and perhaps even learn the language as well;

5 - the kids are on summer break, so it's a good time to take an extended vacation.

And so on.

+1, especially to #4.
I know somebody who plans to do this this summer.. She really misses her family and doesn't see them very often at all, not even yearly. The cost of the flight is astronomical, so when she visits, she likes to stay a while (as she won't be back any time soon). When I asked her if her mom would like to visit for a couple of weeks, she seemed to think visiting for just a couple of weeks would be very unusual.

[Anonymous]

This is common ex-pat tradition no matter what country the person is from. Europeans, Asians, South Americans, Africans, Australians AND Americans do this regularly. It is often built into a work contract to provide airfare "home" for the family members when working overseas. You don't realize that Americans do the exact same thing (in reverse) because you are not living overseas with them. If you did then you would understand the need to keep connected with your family and culture, especially when you have children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Leaving your husband alone for three months is not very smart. They might go to Happy Hour and find more than booze to be happy about.

You're projecting again.

I had a "same time next year" for several years with a man whose wife spent every August in another country visiting her parents. We spent one long weekend in Augudt on a friend's boat on Chesapeake Bay
Can't remember why it ended but it was a lot of fun and fond memories. So, it does happen.

[Anonymous]

As mentioned above, i also know several expat american living overseas who bring their kids home to the US for summers.

Also know Americans living in the US where the wife and kids live in the vacation home (think Hamptons or florida). The husbands make it down maybe a few times a summer.

Having a stay-at-home wife in the family opens up these possibilities .

[Anonymous]

I've found it to be very common for kids and mom to be gone most of the summer.
Dad usually flies with them and stays two or three weeks.

Many women like it because, depending on their culture, they are not the ones who chose to come over here and would prefer to be back in their home country.

[Anonymous]

It's common in my culture do much do that my mom would take us to beach for the whole summer just a short trip away. Assuming I am able, I hope to do the same with my children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Leaving your husband alone for three months is not very smart. They might go to Happy Hour and find more than booze to be happy about.

You're projecting again.

I had a "same time next year" for several years with a man whose wife spent every August in another country visiting her parents. We spent one long weekend in Augudt on a friend's boat on Chesapeake Bay
Can't remember why it ended but it was a lot of fun and fond memories. So, it does happen.

Good for you. No way I'm sitting around hoping that if I stay near home my husband won't cheat. A cheater will find a way to cheat regardless of my vacation plans.

[Anonymous]

Why would an American take their child to Europe for 3 mos. I'm sure it happens in other countries where ex-pats take their kids here for the summer. There are plenty of families in the U.S. where the wife takes the kids to the beach for the summer. Dad comes to visit once a month for the weekend.