What is wrong with me that people see me this way?

[Anonymous]

I agree you should just stop sharing personal details. My guess is that you talk about your childhood a lot and/or dramatically, which is why they think you are lying in the first place. You aren't at work to tell personal stories. Just get your work done.

[Anonymous]

Are you a one upper? Think honestly. For instance, if someone says something interesting or weird about their childhood, do you feel the need to chime in with something from yours that's even MORE weird? People who do this are the ones who strike me as liars because they always have SOMETHING that tops everyone else and it is attention seeking. One uppers can never just let anyone have the moment, they have to show how everything they've done was scarier/cooler/weirder. I would bet that even if you don't recognize it, you are the One Upper in conversation and so everything you say, even if true, appears to be made up so as to force the conversation back to you.

[Anonymous]

I can't see anything good to come from addressing it. I'm in the "stop sharing and just do your job" camp.

[Anonymous]

Sorry, OP. I've been there too. I was the one that posted a while back about being raised in a barn with a cult. Even DCUM questioned, "If this is true..." I remember the first time I became truly aware that sharing my experiences was going to be a long road. I was 19 on a date, telling the man about my past, and he said, "No way! I don't believe it." At that moment, I became more discriminating when sharing my experiences and I only share if I can tell the whole story. It has to makes sense to people. When you share bits and pieces and it doesn't add up, people don't trust you.

[Anonymous]

This is weird. Concentrate on work at work and just forget about all of this. Stop sharing so much. You are causing your own problems.

[Anonymous]

First of all that coworkeris full of shit and stirring the pot.

I absolutely would not discuss this with anyone else because in all likelihood this is a setup designed to make you look crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you a one upper? Think honestly. For instance, if someone says something interesting or weird about their childhood, do you feel the need to chime in with something from yours that's even MORE weird? People who do this are the ones who strike me as liars because they always have SOMETHING that tops everyone else and it is attention seeking. One uppers can never just let anyone have the moment, they have to show how everything they've done was scarier/cooler/weirder. I would bet that even if you don't recognize it, you are the One Upper in conversation and so everything you say, even if true, appears to be made up so as to force the conversation back to you.

+1. I wondered about this too. OP, google the "Penelope" skits from SNL starring Kristen Wiig. It's an exaggeration of the type, but it'll give you an idea of the sort of serial exaggerator/one-upper who gets everyone rolling their eyes and thinking someone is full of it.

Also possible that there's just one person stirring the pot, as another PP said, and is just one of those toxic frenemies trying to get you off-balance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP. I've been there too. I was the one that posted a while back about being raised in a barn with a cult. Even DCUM questioned, "If this is true..." I remember the first time I became truly aware that sharing my experiences was going to be a long road. I was 19 on a date, telling the man about my past, and he said, "No way! I don't believe it." At that moment, I became more discriminating when sharing my experiences and I only share if I can tell the whole story. It has to makes sense to people. When you share bits and pieces and it doesn't add up, people don't trust you.

Also grew up in a cult under some extremely non-normal circumstances and never shared it wih anyone until I met my now husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP. I've been there too. I was the one that posted a while back about being raised in a barn with a cult. Even DCUM questioned, "If this is true..." I remember the first time I became truly aware that sharing my experiences was going to be a long road. I was 19 on a date, telling the man about my past, and he said, "No way! I don't believe it." At that moment, I became more discriminating when sharing my experiences and I only share if I can tell the whole story. It has to makes sense to people. When you share bits and pieces and it doesn't add up, people don't trust you.

I find it so strange that people automatically assume others are lying about such things. I assume truth unless given a real reason not to. I have noticed though, that here in the DC area, people have a bit of a cruel streak

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP. I've been there too. I was the one that posted a while back about being raised in a barn with a cult. Even DCUM questioned, "If this is true..." I remember the first time I became truly aware that sharing my experiences was going to be a long road. I was 19 on a date, telling the man about my past, and he said, "No way! I don't believe it." At that moment, I became more discriminating when sharing my experiences and I only share if I can tell the whole story. It has to makes sense to people. When you share bits and pieces and it doesn't add up, people don't trust you.

I find it so strange that people automatically assume others are lying about such things. I assume truth unless given a real reason not to. I have noticed though, that here in the DC area, people have a bit of a cruel streak

I am the pp who wondered if she is a one upper. I say that because like you, I typically accept most things people tell me as truth UNLESS they are delivered in a weird way. Like the one upmanship. I totally believe OP that what she's saying is true, I'm just wondering if the way she is presenting it is off putting and making people question her. I have had people tell me commonplace things I don't believe because the way they presented it was so bullshitty. But I have also accepted some bizarre info as pure truth if it is delivered earnestly and in an normal conversational way.

[Anonymous]

I'm a diplomat kid and I've lived all over the world and have met countless celebrities and heads of state. I don't tell people anything, because no one would ever believe my childhood. Hugs, op.

[Anonymous]

Never over-share personal information with people at work.

Yes, I agree with the boss who said that the work environment is not the place to be popular or make friends. The latter may happen but keeping the focus on business in an amicable environment is the best approach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP. I've been there too. I was the one that posted a while back about being raised in a barn with a cult. Even DCUM questioned, "If this is true..." I remember the first time I became truly aware that sharing my experiences was going to be a long road. I was 19 on a date, telling the man about my past, and he said, "No way! I don't believe it." At that moment, I became more discriminating when sharing my experiences and I only share if I can tell the whole story. It has to makes sense to people. When you share bits and pieces and it doesn't add up, people don't trust you.

Also grew up in a cult under some extremely non-normal circumstances and never shared it wih anyone until I met my now husband.

Smart (barn cult kid).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, OP. I've been there too. I was the one that posted a while back about being raised in a barn with a cult. Even DCUM questioned, "If this is true..." I remember the first time I became truly aware that sharing my experiences was going to be a long road. I was 19 on a date, telling the man about my past, and he said, "No way! I don't believe it." At that moment, I became more discriminating when sharing my experiences and I only share if I can tell the whole story. It has to makes sense to people. When you share bits and pieces and it doesn't add up, people don't trust you.

I find it so strange that people automatically assume others are lying about such things. I assume truth unless given a real reason not to. I have noticed though, that here in the DC area, people have a bit of a cruel streak

Barn cult kid here I agree, which is why I believe almost any crazy story I hear, unless proven otherwise. For this reason, I also attract a lot of friends with "stuff." I have a colorful group of friends. LOL.

[Anonymous]

I'm going to echo a pp and say I bet you are doing a lot of one upmanship and talking about your childhood all the time.

Coworker: I'm so excited to go to London over Christmas.
You: oh I love London! I lived there when I was 8 and we lived in this gorgeous apartment overlooking tower bridge and attended a party where the queen was at!

Coworker: can't wait to go to Disney world but little Larla is afraid of flying for the first time
You: oh yeah. I remember being afraid of flying when I took my first flight at 3 years old but by the time I was 9 I had flown so many times around the world I was a seasoned pro!

I know someone like this and while I know her stories are true, I also know many people think she's a pathalogical liar. After she rudely responded to me when I told her to cool down the one upmanship, I no longer tell people she's actually being truthful.