Invitation somehow an insult

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]You said they never met your children but then said they asked your older child questions about you.[/b]

Why would you want them to come to your house of they are so intrusive?

Must be a troll. Great catch!

I think OP was married b/f.

[Anonymous]

Don't let you husband use your parents as his "pet project" because of a grandparent fantasy.

If they hate him, then he should get over it. Fortunately, your mom isn't falling for the invite anyway, which would most likely be a disaster in waiting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My awful parents have never met my children. I invited them since our basement will be vacant for a few months. She doesn't work and neither does my dad. They've never met my youngest (1 year old), despite being invited numerous times. My mom deemed this invite as an insult because she has occupational therapy for a minor outpatient procedure once a month. She sent crazy photos of her hand (she had carpal tunnel surgery) and then said that I "wouldn't understand since I've never had surgery" (I guess c sections don't count?). They're young (50s) and have the financial resources to come, but I offered to pay for their tickets too. My dad is more than capable of rolling a suitcase along for my mom if she doesn't feel comfortable using her other hand.

My parents seem to discover new lows every single time. By the way, they don't live far away (they can drive) or they can take a quick flight. they've never visited my house once, and the many times I've come to them they've done something horrible like break into my email account on my phone, or ask my older children how often we fight and how much money we make etc.

Why do I want them to come? I don't. But my husband really thinks its unfair to not have my kids know their grandparents. Sorry for the vent.

OP, why, why WHY would your DH want your kids to get to know your toxic parents? You have invited them numerous times. Just try to LET IT GO and remind your DH that it is your and his job to protect your children from toxic people, even if they are their grandparents.

Protect your kids from this craziness!!!!!

[Anonymous]

Cut them off now. They sound horrid.

[Anonymous]

How did they ask your kids anything if they've never met them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]You said they never met your children but then said they asked your older child questions about you.[/b]

Why would you want them to come to your house of they are so intrusive?

Must be a troll. Great catch!

I think OP was married b/f.

She said never met my kids she didn't qualify you making up your own story now

[Anonymous]

I understand where you're coming from, OP. My FIL has never met our child (his only grandchild). We have invited him a few times and he always says no. At first he said it was because he just had knee replacement surgery, however that didn't prevent him from taking several expensive vacations instead of meeting our child. My husband has pretty much given up on any kind of relationship with his father, and we don't really have any relationship. He calls about 5 times a year and that's it. I wish things were different but I have to accept that the reality that FIL has no interest in a relationship with us. It's sad when grandparents don't act the way you hope, but it is what it is I guess.

[Anonymous]

You invite and they accept or decline. When you invite, specify for three d as us, a week, whatever, but a definite beginning and end of visit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You said they never met your children but then said they asked your older child questions about you.

Why would you want them to come to your house of they are so intrusive?

They've never met my youngest. My oldest hates them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]You said they never met your children but then said they asked your older child questions about you.[/b]

Why would you want them to come to your house of they are so intrusive?

Must be a troll. Great catch!

I think OP was married b/f.

Haha no. I'm sorry if this is confusing. My parents met my oldest who hates them. That's why we won't visit them- they seriously broke into our email the last time we were there and asked my poor kid stuff like "does your mommy sleep with your daddy in the same room?". " do they fight?". "does mommy cry?"

The weird thing is that we have great marriage, but if we got divorced my parents would not be there for me at all.

Thank you to the commentator in particular who said we shouldn't worry about fulfilling my husbands's grandparents fantasy. I already let mine die a long time ago.

And yes I agree. Someone is watching over me to have a perfect excuse for my parents not to visit. They are so awful!

Thanks again.

Op

[Anonymous]

I just re-read my original post and see where I wrote "my parents have never met my children".

I bet you that was a Freudian slip because they don't know my kids, even though they met my oldest. They're the worst.

Op

[Anonymous]

May I ask why they hate your husband?

i feel for you. My parents are horrible people as well. Nothing will ever change them. Thank God my DH parents are great. OP it's probably a good idea not to invite them again. You would be very stressed out the entire time. Maybe ask them if they want to stay at a hotel and you'll meet them out for dinner? Start slowly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:May I ask why they hate your husband?

i feel for you. My parents are horrible people as well. Nothing will ever change them. Thank God my DH parents are great. OP it's probably a good idea not to invite them again. You would be very stressed out the entire time. Maybe ask them if they want to stay at a hotel and you'll meet them out for dinner? Start slowly.

They hate all their inlaws. I have no idea why. They say my husband is stuck up or something. I have asked but never got an answer. my mom has told dh he could do better than me. They're just mentally ill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May I ask why they hate your husband?

i feel for you. My parents are horrible people as well. Nothing will ever change them. Thank God my DH parents are great. OP it's probably a good idea not to invite them again. You would be very stressed out the entire time. Maybe ask them if they want to stay at a hotel and you'll meet them out for dinner? Start slowly.

They hate all their inlaws. I have no idea why. They say my husband is stuck up or something. I have asked but never got an answer. my mom has told dh he could do better than me. They're just mentally ill.

This is op btw.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:May I ask why they hate your husband?

i feel for you. My parents are horrible people as well. Nothing will ever change them. Thank God my DH parents are great. OP it's probably a good idea not to invite them again. You would be very stressed out the entire time. Maybe ask them if they want to stay at a hotel and you'll meet them out for dinner? Start slowly.

They hate all their inlaws. I have no idea why. They say my husband is stuck up or something. I have asked but never got an answer. my mom has told dh he could do better than me. They're just mentally ill.

This is op btw.

So sorry OP. Ask yourself and your spouse what is FAIR about MAKING your children meet your parents. They sound like they could do nothing but harm them.

Take the cue from your older child, who figured them out right away. There is nothing to be gained from this forced introduction.

So sorry again. Dreadful stuff.